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pointlessness

I dont know if everyone feels like this but I constantly feel like there is no point to me existing. I just cant see myself every achieving anyhting worthwhile in the scheme of things or being able to make anyhting of my life or anyone elses for that matter and it jsut doesnt seem like there is ever going to be any point to existing. There just doesnt seem to me like it would matter really at all if I didnt exist and what is the point of anything really. The only thing I look forward to is going to sleep each night so I wont have to think about things. I feel like all I have to do is fill in the days to make time go faster until I'm old.  

 

I just dont know if this is how life is supposed to feel like and I just need to come to terms with this. I just dont really know how to express how I generally feel about life, I couldnt really say this to anyone without sounding like a total cynic but it justdoesnt feel like this is the outlook I should really have nor is it particularly realistic or helpful I realise but I cant stop feeling this way? 

 

Thanks for any replies xxxx

Re: pointlessness

Hey @Charliex,

Welcome to RO Smiley Happy
Sorry to hear that you're struggling with things seeming pointless at the moment. How long have you been feeling like that?

I think lots of people do go through times where they feel that way, but it doesn't have to be like that forever and it's definitely not how it's "supposed to feel" or something that you just need to accept.

It sounds like you're looking at huge worthwhile things as something that you might not be able to achieve... But maybe you could try and think about some of the smaller things that still make a difference. For example, giving a smile or a complement to someone can make a person's day feel better - I'd argue that that is worthwhile even though it seems like a smallish thing. Can you think of any other examples where a small action might make a little impact to even just one person (including if that person is yourself)?

What sort of stuff do you spend your time doing?
____________________#iftoastershadfeelings____________________

Re: pointlessness

Hi @Bay52VU , thanks for your reply - I pretty much always feel this way and have for a couple of years. I pretty much go to bed every night hoping Iwont wake up or I'll just get a horrible disease and die (sorry if i am not supposed to post about this sort of stuff) and I just am not really sure why. I always try to get really involved in things because I know its the right thing to do and its what I'm supposed to do to feel better but in between these things I do so little because everything always makes me really anxious and so nothing is particularly enjoyable and when I do things I feel anxious and hate being there and just hate myself then I feel bad about feeling anxious and not enjoying things because I really feel like I should like doing things and seeing people but i never do and I just cant explain why but it just makes me feel like if I can never seem to enjoy anything and do anyhitng worthwhile or aciheve anything at all that there isnt really much point thats all. 

 

Sorry for the rant, I just need to vent I think and really want to stop feeling this way thats all, its just been so long and rather lonely.

 

 

Re: pointlessness

Hey @Charliex and welcome to ReachOut! Smiley Happy
I'm sorry that you've been feeling this way. You definitely aren't alone in how you're feeling.
Sometimes, life can have its down moments. Talking to someone can help you to turn things around. Have you ever spoken to a counsellor or maybe a close friend or family member about how you're feeling?
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Re: pointlessness

Hello @Charliex,

 

There will be times in life where it all seems bleak and the prospect of not achieving anything worthwhile is daunting, but you have to remember that in many books that you read, the immortals are always envious of us mortals precisely because of our short lives. It is amazing what we can achieve in this short period of time on Earth; men have conquered cities, women have saved lives and vice versa. "The virtue of angels is that they cannot deteriorate; their flaw is that they cannot improve. Man's flaw is that he can deteriorate; and his virtue is that he can improve".

 

Yes life is not always sunshine and roses, because if you do not have the rain and the thorns, you cannot fully appreciate the light and beauty you are given. Have a bit of hope, even if life seems monotonous, it is not. Each day brings something new, so look for that. There is a reason you have been given the chance to live above others, so treasure it. Look around you, there are people who are glad that you are alive, people who love you even if you do not always see it.

 

It is not wrong to be a cynic, because you do have to be wary of who you trust to protect yourself, but do not always view everything in a colour of grey or a cloud of suspicion. There are good people in this world, do not make the mistake of judging everyone or everything the same just by experience with one tiny fraction.

 

Work towards it slowly, read up about good things in the world and make a list of things you are appreciative about each day. Slowly build up your confidence in the world and soon your quality of life, and your outlook, will improve. Write in a diary, it will help you to express any feelings you have without being judged. Then, it can also be a source of inspiration when you look back on your journey of improvement, and also give you hope that despite of having thought of a certain day as the worst you have ever experienced, you were strong enough to get through it. Please tell me how you go.

 

Best of luck,

 

Winter Rain.

 

Re: pointlessness

@Charliex thanks for sharing.
Sounds like you're going through a really tough time.
Also going off how you mentioned the need to vent, it made me wonder do you have anyone in your life that are you able to vent to face-to-face? A good whing to a friend or relative can make a world of difference I've found. I always feels worse when I keep my blues to myself.
But not everyone has someone like that in their life.
If that's the case for you, do you think talking to a counsellor could help you at all?