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Re: relationship stress

Hey @meesha, thanks for jumping back on the forums!

 

Seems like you've got a lot going on right now, not just the relationship stuff. I'm thinking the academic/financial stuff might be a bit easier to address. e.g. what aspects of the academic side are stressing you, and how do you think you could try to tackle those?

// Spiral outward, keep going. //

Re: relationship stress

hi @letitgo Thank you. Yes its pretty tough at the moment. but yes I've been thinking about this a lot and even though my academic issues has been there for a while I am trying everything I could to see what is wrong and why it hasn't been going well and what should I do going forward. That's what I am thinking all the time these days. Its a tricky situation. As for financial problem, its all about finding a permanent job which I am struggling to find and it has been the case for a long time now. I am running out of the money so its a dire situation to be in. So its so hard to think/handle all these by myself. like I know its my life but its so overwhelming you know.. 

Re: relationship stress

Yeah, @meesha, I can totally see how that must be overwhelming for you.

Academically, maybe you could identify one subject/area you most want to work on and focus on that, maybe devising a study plan/schedule?

// Spiral outward, keep going. //

Re: relationship stress

Thanks @letitgo ,
Yes I think I have identified that.. I am not entirely sure whether academically everything will work out.. but I guess I can only try.. given the fact that this is probably my last chance before things get worse, I'll try my best to overcome this. It will be hard though. but I will try Smiley Happy

In the meantime this relationship thing really bothers me, mainly because I am in a zone where if I take some action like approach her again on this(which one could even say pointless), things could get worse and it'll probably ruin the friendship. while if I don't do anything at all I won't be moving on(which I am adamant of) which means this will keep bothering my mind..

Re: relationship stress

Hey @meesha, this relationship stuff is definitely a tricky and I'm thinking it probably feels a bit like a 'damned if you do, damned if you don't [talk to her about it]...' kind of situation, am I right? Do you think there are other things you could do - apart from talking to her about it again - that would help you move on? Perhaps you could try writing down exactly how you feel, a bit like a letter to her, but not actually give it to her, just to help you process how you're feeling about it all? Have you tried anything like this before?

Re: relationship stress

Hey @Autumn23
Exactly! that's exactly how I feels. Yeah the obvious thing would be to remove her from social media and avoid seeing her again. this would be the most direct path of moving on. and I know it is by experience. but I just can't do that Smiley Sad like idk I don't want to do that. I mean sure she didn't love me back or like me back or whatever, but like she didn't do anything wrong you know.  Smiley Sad

Yeah writing down how I feel sounds good, I haven't tried something like that before. but I will give it a go, thanks Smiley Happy 

at the end of the day we all like having some hope you know. It may be false hope but having her this way(in social media, seeing around and knowing she is around) gives me some hope since I have feelings towards her. its better than having no hope at all. I know its not the best way forward. but I expect absolutely nothing either. hmm this whole thing sucks though.. 

 

Re: relationship stress

How'd you go with @Autumn23's suggestion of writing it all down @meesha?

// Spiral outward, keep going. //

Re: relationship stress

hey @letitgo

Yes I wrote down what I wanted to say but didn't actually say that to her. I did actually felt better about things than before..
As for moving on, I am not sure. :/ I mean I feel like I may just have to go with the flow than taking it too seriously.. like just keep working on my life and improving myself and getting my other stuff sorted out and who knows while doing so my relationship side of things might change. Its easier said than done though. but still, I have to try this at least I guess