cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 
Highlighted

stressed about coming home from my holiday

I'm having a good time but I'm starting to get stressed about what's going to happen when I get home for many reasons.

Firstly when I get home I'm going into full time study, I haven't studied or worked or done anything significant in years. I'm worried I won't cope, I'm worried about hospital admissions, I'm worried about failing, I'm worried no one in my class would like me. I also miss the first week due to my holiday, which means I will be behind and everyone will already be starting to get to know each other, after all it is only a small tafe class.

Secondly when I get home I'll beat my record for self harm free. I'm scared I'll slip up or something. I haven't ven this long without self harm in years and tbh it scares me, it feels weird coping without self harm

Next I'm stressed about therapy, it's been over a month since I've seen my therapist due to her going on holiday then me going on holiday, and it's going to be hard getting back into the routine. And to make things worse my new classes clash with therapy times so I don't know what to do, plus I won't have time to see her twice weekly.

Lastly I'm worried that things will go back to how they were before my holiday, I'm feeling so good right now and I'm scared it's not going to last. I don't want to be so unstable and depressed anymore. I want to live my life and not let my mental health ruin everything like it has in the past.
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire
Highlighted

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

That's a lot of things to worry about @redhead! You know we can't control what happens to us, but we can manage our reaction to those events when they occur. These are all things you have dealt with before - you have studied before, you have been to therapy, you have beaten previous records for being self-harm free. And when those things happened, you managed it - and from everything you've written in previous threads you managed it like a boss!

I won't say 'stop worrying about it' (because honestly, when has that ever been a realistic suggestion?) but I do think the WorryTime app might come in handy here so you can schedule a short period to be stressed and then get back to enjoying the awesomeness of being in Europe on holiday!

Highlighted

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

Sorry to hear you're getting stressed about what's going to happen when you get home. ElleBelle makes a good point – it is our reactions to situations that we can control, not the situations themselves. Your post also made me think about the problem solving tips on RO, especially these steps:

 

  • Step 1. Define the problem.
  • Step 2. Work out goals for each problem.
  • Step 3. Brainstorm lots of possible solutions.
  • Step 4: Rule out any obvious poor options.
  • Step 5. Examine the consequences of different options.
  • Step 6. Identify your best options.

Looking at the things causing you to stress, is there one that you could control with these steps? Maybe reestablishing the therapy routine?

Highlighted

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

@Kit I don't even know where to start to problem solve.
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire
Highlighted

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

Hey @redhead , I'm super glad you're having an amazing holiday right now and that you're in a good place with yourself at the moment! That's such good news!  (I'm also super jelly of your holiday to be honest!). I think it's amazingly awesome that you've gone for such a period without self harm, you should be really proud of yourself!

 

Coming back from a holiday can be a pretty lousy experience and it can be really hard to readjust to life back in "the real world" (as opposed to the super awesome holiday world you get to experience). Coming back from holidays and getting thrown into full time study and having to go through a lot of other changes, like not being able to visit your therapist twice a week would make that adjustment even harder.

 

Are you able to email your therapist while you're on holidays and talk to her about your fears when you come back? There are also apps like Viber (basically as long as you have a net connection you can text + call using the app for free) that make it a lot easier to talk to someone who is in another country. Perhaps by talking to your therapist before you come home might help alleviate some of that stress for you.

 

p.s Way to go about the TAFE study! Can I ask what you're studying ?

Highlighted

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

Hey @redhead, just wanted to start by saying that I'm so happy for you for breaking your record for the amount of time you've been self harm free! You should be really proud of this accomplishment and the strength you've shown.

 

Awesome to hear that you've chosen to start studying again too! Even though you'll miss the first week, you'll still be meeting your new classmates in that "breaking the ice" stage, where everyone is still just getting to know each other. So I'm sure you'll hit it off with some of them!

 


Because it's been so long since your last therapy session, does the thought of going back make you feel like you'll slip back into the way you were feeling before your holiday? 
You've made so much positive progress over the past couple of months and have managed to persevere through things that troubled you in the past, which to me says that you're not the same person as you were earlier this year and you've become stronger!

 

Also very keen on finding out which TAFE class you're starting!

 

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

hey @redhead so glad to hear you are having fun on your holiday and congrats on breaking your record for time without self harming that is awesome! Try and see it as a positive rather than a negative that you are worried about messing up with. You have done so well to achieve this goal, you should at least get to enjoy what the goal brings you Smiley Happy

 

It sucks going back into routine and i suppose starting studying it will be a little bit of a different routine even from before your holidays but if you think of it, your therapist went on holiday, and then you went on holidays and you havent seen them for a little while... and you are good!? Maybe just see how you go with one session a week and then if its not enough you can rearrange some things to make another session possible.. but maybe that will be one of those cross-that-bridge-when-you-get-to-it momentsSmiley Happy Dont stress about it now - be proud of the fact that you have gone a while and are stil good!

 

I know its scary when things are good because it means they can go back down again but honestly you have come so far and I am so proud of you. You are off seeing the freakin world!!!! Do you know how cool that is and how much guts that actually takes to go out of your comfort zone to different cities and countries where they speak different languages and eat different foods and everything is all different and new?!!!!!

 

Have you taken the time to give yourself a massive high five pat on the back chocolate croissont yum yum europe food treat reflection moment about that!???!!Smiley Very Happy

Highlighted

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

Hi @redhead, I've experienced a similar situation to yourself (coming back from a holiday and trying to get back into a routine after going so long without working or school) and it was really intimidating and stressful. Some ways that I coped with it was trying to see my city through the eyes of a tourist. It made me feel more appreciative of my city, I took more notice of things, and felt more adventerous like I did on holiday. Also when I was feeling down I thought about my happiest moments travelling to cheer myself up.

In regards to being afraid of failing, I get that. I'm still terrified of any kind of failure but as long as you want to pass your TAFE course, I'm sure you will. In my experience with TAFE the people in the course wanted to be there and do the work so they were very happy to be helpful and inspire you to work hard as well. TAFE is a much more relaxed environment than Univeristy. So as long as you do all the work and make sure you talk with your teachers if you need any help, you will pass. A week isn't long enough for people to form cliques you won't be able to break into. Coming in a week late may even be in advantage to you making friends! It will give you an excuse to ask your fellow classmates for some help catching up, and to talk about the amazing experience you had that made you a week late.

You can do this! you've already accomplished so much Smiley Happy

Highlighted

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

I will be studying community service.

Worry time app has helped a bit. I need to learn to be more in the present and not get so anxious about everything.

Thanks for all the advice everyone
===========================
Trying to make my misery
just a piece of my history
A little less victim a little more victory
-Icon for Hire
Highlighted

Re: stressed about coming home from my holiday

Good to hear RH - keep at it! glad worrytime helped a bit...

Online Community Manager

ReachOut.com