Following a suggestion from @Ben-RO I've created a new thread because I'm struggling somewhat.
I want to be able to help people mentally or physically because no one should feel like they deserve to be sad but I feel like I can't, won't ever be able to achieve that. Like it's some silly idea that comes from reading too many comics or too many shows.
I got back almost two weeks ago and when it came to beginning uni, I completely flipped out. I can't handle things that I can't control, things that are hard so I just don't bother and I can't bring myself to trying so that I don't get disappointed.
Overseas my last hostparents always asked what I would do when I got back to Oz, what I would study. I'm studying to be a primary teacher but I don't know what I want.
Basically, I just feel like a failure; overwhelmed, lazy, hopeless, like everything I ever hope to do is just a fantasy. And that I'm just being overdramatic or melodramatic. But whether I am or not, I... would still like help.
I'm really glad you started a thread about this @N1ghtW1ng. You are a rock for so many people here, and it's ok to stick your hand up sometimes to get a bit of that help back.
I know you know this, but it bears repeating - this is a huge period of adjustment for you. I remember that you found it quite diffiicult when you first arrived overseas dealing with the loneliness and unfamiliarity. Now you have returned home, and it's a very similar process. Change can be really exciting and filled with opportunity, but that doesn't mean it's easy! You don't have to decide right away what you want to do. Take your time, you have a whole lifetime to decide what happens next. But please keep in mind that you can do this, because you've done it before! You might have flipped out and struggled to cope initially, but you got through it and you can get through it again.
Onto the other part, about getting help.. what sort of support system do you have in Oz? And if you don't have one, how can we start to build one? A counsellor at uni perhaps, or an arsenal of coping strategies we can create?
As for support strageties... I usually just deal with it. I used to write in my book but that is proving to be less helpful with current issues. There might be a counsellor at uni I can turn to but I won't know for another month until I start.
Hi @N1ghtW1ng thank you so much for sharing this with us all. I am sure there are many others reading who may also be feeling similarly and will value this discussion.
In fact, next week the GR session is going to be on transitions, especially between school and uni - so finding changes in circumstances difficult is so normal! Yet that doesnt make the experience any easier!
It is sooo unfair that society expects us to know what to do when we have to choose degrees or courses or jobs to start a career!!! It is impossible to know whether one thing will really work well for you until you try it! Most people I have spoken to (including myself) changed around courses a few times before finding something they settled on. And even then many changed again as soon as they completed uni and started work! Remember you are not tethered to any decision.
It sounds like starting out with primary teaching is a great start.
It is really valuable to look into support at your university. Often there are lots of services in place that can help a lot but they get missed. Some uni's have an "inclusion" type service where they act a bit like a case worker to help ensure through tough times you are not disadvataged with your academic work by making "reasonable adjustments" (a.k.a helping you request extensions from your lecturers or whatever else you may need). Make use of these sorts of supports if your uni has them!!!
What is something you could do in the mean time until you start that might help? Would a brain storm be useful?
[Edit - spelling and a few words]
I think I'll wait until I start uni and go there before I look into the support that they have. It'd be easier when I'm actually going to figure them all out.
I'm not sure what I can do while I wait. I have a month's holidays and I still haven't gotten a job because I need to do up a resume but I'm finding even that simple task difficult.
What do you mean by brainstorm?
Seen something fantastic on the forums?