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tw death

just found out that a teacher at my school died. her son's been in my class for the last like five years. i don't know what to do. i feel sick.


i didn't know her well but i did see her around a lot and have her as a sub sometimes. she was so lovely. fuck.


messaged a friend who i know was close to her, and i want to message her son too but idk what to say. words seem inadequate.

Re: tw death

Hi @roseisnotaplant, this sounds like an incredibly difficult situation, and I’m sorry that you’re going through this.


Lots of emotions can be thrown up when we grieve - just going to attach a couple of RO resources to look at - Working through griefCommon reactions to death and Give grief time (story). With regards to messaging her son, perhaps mention something about being there for him, as I think a support network would be very helpful.


Speaking of support networks, it’s also important that you look after yourself during this time. Since it’s someone at school, it sounds like some of your friends may be going through something similar. This can be a good thing because it means that you can empathise with one another. Is your school organising counselling or something similar? Please also remember KHL (1800 55 1800) if you need to speak to someone in the meantime. I would also suggest that self care would become a priority during this time - what are some things you can do tonight to incorporate self care into your routine?


Please keep us updated, and remember that we’re always here for you. ❤️

Re: tw death

@roseisnotaplant that is so hard, you must be experiencing some grief, and it is so beautiful you want to reach out to her son. Do you feel comfortable doing that once you figure out what to say? That is really lovely. I am so sorry for your loss. We are here to listen.

Re: tw death

hey @roseisnotaplant
wow that is so so tough! im sorry to hear this. perhaps if you wanted to send a msg a simple 'im sorry for your loss, thinking of you at this time' would suffice..?
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: tw death

Yeah I'll send something simple like that tonight @scared01. Thanks @BreeRO @mrmusic - just been doing some art and stuff. Our school's really good with counselling, it's there if i need it.

Re: tw death

Hi @roseisnotaplant


Death is always hard to deal. Even though you didn't know the teacher very well, it is can still be very difficult to deal with. 


I experienced something similar. They were a big part of your life but you feel the loss nevertheless. That empty filling and it's filled with sadness. I don't know what to do in your situation as well, death is a hard subject to deal with. 

Re: tw death

@roseisnotaplant I'm so sorry to hear this news. As @LeoTheLion and other have said - grief is complex and tough, and never easy for anyone to deal with. 

If there are any thoughts or feelings you need to get off your chest, we are here.

Remember to look after yourself, and give yourself time to process in whatever way you need.  . Others in your school that knew the teacher are probably feeling a lot of complex things as well - although everyone experiences  grief differently - it could be really helpful to talk together, and share how you're all feeling. 
Reach out to those around you for support, and put your self care into full swing. Heart Thinking of you 

Re: tw death

I'm sorry for your loss @roseisnotaplant, it sounds very shocking. It's very kind that you want to reach out to your friend and to your teacher's son. I'm sure they'd both appreciate the compassion. How have you been lately? Heart

Re: tw death

@roseisnotaplant Heart
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: tw death

Yeah I've been okay @DruidChild @scared01 - I think tomorrow will be the hardest because it'll be the first time we'll all be at school together since it happened.