Re: Study Tips From ADHDers - ReachOut Forums

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

Hey everyone, welcome!

Tonight we're going to chat to a couple of awesome ADHDers - Laura & Shay - about the ups and downs of studying as someone who has ADHD, along with some tips that help them minimise their executive dysfunction, focus struggles, and rejection sensitive dysphoria.

If you'd like to read a bit more about ADHD you might like to check out our articles here:

Ask A Therapist : Everything you need to know about ADHD

5 ways ADHD affects your life in ways you may not expect

Learning to love ADHD

ADHD : Everything you need to know

But for now, let's get into it! Please feel welcome to ask any questions you have, share any of your own experiences, or add some tips that have helped you study as an ADHDer too!

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

Laura : My name is Laura (she/her) and I'm a design manager and illustrator. I have ADHD and Bipolar. I love cycling, hiking with my partner and my pup Lemmy, baking and cooking, and making art in my studio.

Shay : Howdy I'm Shay! (she/they). I'm a visual artist and performer, who dabbles in comedy. This year I've started taking burlesque classes, which means I'm alongside the dance aspect, I'm really into costume making especially using rhinestones.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

What did you study/are you studying?

Laura : I studied illustration!

Shay : I have two degrees in Gender Studies & Media, as well as a Cert III in arts administration. I'm currently studying a Diploma of Graphic Design at TAFE.

I have also previously tried to study/ gotten partially through a Visual Arts degree and a Cert IV in Community Service work, which was a pathway to studying Social work.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

Tell us a little bit about what ADHD is like for you?

Laura : ADHD is like being on a boat in the ocean. You think you're sitting still, in one spot, but in just a matter of moments you've drifted a mile from where you've started. This can make neurotypical activities difficult, but it makes creative pursuits incredibly interesting.

Shay : It's been the cause of ongoing identity crises. It wasn't until March of this year that I was formally diagnosed with ADHD. Prior to this, I spent about 2 and half years bouncing back and forth between 'this seems like something I might have, but I'm probably just making it up' to 'I am convinced and I just need to find a medical professional who will agree with me, and hopefully, with medication, I won't feel overwhelmed all the time'.

Prior to diagnosis, or self-diagnosis, I found it extremely confusing to make sense of where I fit in the world, within friendships, relationships, a housemate, a co-worker or a student. I feel like it has made me very inconsistent in every part of my life and I've been exhausting myself trying to appear like I'm coping all of the time. Constantly flustered, trying to work out:

Am I an introvert or an extrovert? Why do I feel warm, funny and charismatic in some social settings, and then like a shy loser imposter in others?
Am I an impulsive person? or someone who struggles to make decisions?
Am I a good friend? Do I have good enough boundaries? Am I a people pleaser?
Do I have a strong sense of self and my values? am I a proud firestarter 'difficult' woman and feminist? Or a coward, with no spine, because I find it extremely difficult when people I cared about, or people in positions of authority disapprove in some way?

Self-diagnosis, and then getting a formal diagnosis, has felt like it's given me permission to reframe my identity from - a hot mess or 'bad person who's bad at being a person, despite trying her best,

to - I am a disabled person who's trying my best, despite being misunderstood and living in an ableist world. It has helped me access genuine self-compassion, whereas before being told that 'I need to be more kind to myself' felt like I was a villain enabling myself to continue being toxic.

Trying to eradicate the negative self-talk as 'cognitive distortions', 'undeserved criticism' or a 'trait of low self-esteem' felt disingenuous when I felt like I was always looking at a trail of evidence supporting the facts. How can I not be a flakey bad friend, when I forget birthdays, have so many unanswered texts, and details from conversations that we've had before?? In hindsight, I think my baseline has always included a disproportionate sense of guilt, and like I was always an imposter.

But unlearning internalized ableism, is like trying to unlearn your first language and adapt to only speaking a whole new language.

Unmasking Mental Health GIF by Unpopular Cartoonist

On some level, it's so enraging that the things that have been constant struggles I'm learning through hearing more from other's lived experience is textbook ADHD struggles. Feeling like I'm the bad housemate for having so much stuff from chasing so many different hobbies, having doom piles, and constantly forgetting to do the dishes. Being very present, generous as a friend, being fantastic at helping someone else in crisis, but also withdrawing, disappearing, not responding to messages, not attending things I said yes to, and ghosting at social gatherings.

I'm still very much in a raw state of processing feelings of anger that I've been disabled this whole time, and no one noticed or enquired. As well as waves of grief - grief for the life i missed out on having, had been able to receive support sooner or at all. The realization of how gaslit I felt, being told I need to try harder to get better, but there is no getting better if I am trying to benchmark myself on productivity-obsessed neurotypical standards and without neurodivergent affirming support and care.

In this new era I am however finding comfort in the idea that prioritising novelty and joy, is important to my wellbeing. Making the effort o have a cute pink waterbotle is worth it if it helps me drink more water!

I’m learning to take my sensory needs seriously. I am learning to do hard things. I am working on re-building my skills as I feel like i've had some skill regressions. Most days I feel like I am a good person, and when the negative self talk kicks in, I tell myself 'thats not helpful' and I need to start where I am using the tools that I have. I’m a beautiful work-in-progress.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

What was/is your biggest challenge with studying as an ADHDer?

Laura : Focus, anxiety and keeping my interest. If I'm not interested in the content there's little chance I'm going to retain it. And then I start to panic because I know I'm not retaining the information or I'm running out of time to study or complete a task.

Shay : Identifying one single aspect as the biggest is really difficult haha. Falling behind in any way triggers Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) and shame which then become some of the biggest blocks for procrastination, communication and general engagement in study. An example of this is with in-person classes I was always running late, and feeling like I can't cope with walking into a room where I feel like the uni lecturer and classmates all hate me for consistently being late.

I think feeling misunderstood was and is really hard, especially when I also didn't understand why I was so inconsistent. One minute I am smashing my organising, I've got highlighters, I've put the due dates in my calendar, I've created a whole color-coded complex system, I've got ideas for essays. Next minute, I've lost momentum, I feel overwhelmed and don't know how to start.

On the outside, it looks like me being late to class, then being extremely engaged in discussion, and then handing work in 5 days late (with and without extensions), and getting feedback that the assignment would have been an HD had I submitted it on time. Or the times that I would hand things in on time, would also get marked down because of spelling mistakes, grammar issues, and improper technique with referencing.

I would be told that I need to 'apply myself' and 'pay more attention to detail'. But this was me applying myself, and I felt frustrated by the fact that it doesn't matter how deep or advanced my understanding of key concepts was, if I can't get through the boring or ableist aspects surrounding spelling or grammar, I would always lose marks.

The RSD aspect can feel really embarrassing to talk about, like explaining to another person I don't think I can go to this class anymore because I think everyone hates me, sounds so self-centered, self-involved and silly. But I could absolutely tell there were moments, especially in first year when my lecturers felt frustrated by me. I felt like they didn't start to respect me until they saw me rocking up to gender studies conferences where they were presenting or finding out that I already had jobs working for peak feminist organisations. They started taking me more seriously then, as while I sucked at doing academia according to elitist standards, I was out there contributing to the feminist movement and eager to learn.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

What kind of support did you get from your school/college/uni? Or if you didn’t get any, how would you have liked to have been supported?

Laura : At the time none, though I was undiagnosed at that point. I think art school is structured in a way that's good for ADHD brains in many ways, but I struggled with the art history classes pretty significantly. If it had been presented in a more hands-on, interact way rather than showing slides in a giant auditorium, I think I definitely would have retained a lot more.

Shay : I didn't have any kind of support in my first attempts at uni and TAFE. I consequently failed courses, had a GPA so bad I couldn’t use it to get into another degree, so I sat the stat test later to claw my way back in.

I didn't know there was support, or have the insight, organising skills or self-advocacy skills to enquire into the possibility of support. And for a long time, I internalised this as me not being smart, organised or disciplined enough to ever engage in higher education. I sincerely felt like I was doomed, and it was my fault because I couldn't work out a way to 'try harder'.

In my third successful attempt at higher education I had more resources, a smartphone that could help me navigate public transport to get to uni, keep my uni timetable, see due dates or send emails. Having a laptop, so I could work on assignments at home but also take it with me to uni, so I could actually take notes in class, or even work on assignments. Also having sound-cancelling headphones made it much easier to not get overwhelmed by the environment around me and find myself in the deep focus zone. It wasn't until the second year that I became aware of access plans, and that was something I could access because I was seeing a psychologist for what I thought was 'anxiety'. I was under the impression that access plans were for disabilities and I didn’t realise that mental health conditions counted as a disability. It was semi helpful, but I found that the process of needing to have the plan reviewed and renewed every semester to be inaccessible. This meant that some semesters I didn’t get a access plan until it was almost too late to use it or I didn’t have any some semesters. The access plan basically told the lecturers sometimes I would be late and that’s okay, or if I couldn’t get to a tute, I was allowed to email them and go to a different class to participate, and being able to get extensions without providing extensive proof of illness or extreme adversity.

At uni I also worked out that the counselling service had staff that had a wide range of qualifications in social work, counselling and psychology. So I could see a bonafide psychologist for free who could provide tangible skills, & a trauma informed informed approach. This was particularly helpful when I was experiencing grief, two friends passed away while I was studying my at uni. During my first attempt at uni studying a different degree, I had a friend pass away, this trauma became a catalyst of not coping, which led to me failing and dropping out. So on round three, I was very freaked out about the same thing happening again, but having a support system is what made a world of difference.

I also started making use of the writers centre, which is basically like having a tutor help you with assignments in terms of planning essays, having someone to bounce ideas off of and to provide resources on essay structure and referencing styles. While this was great I wish they funded it more so that you could access this out of business hours and on weekends, and have more appointments open in general.

I have an access plan for tafe, and it’s very different to uni with much longer extensions but there isn’t anywhere near the same amount of support for specific skills relating to what I’m studying, which I think is also a funding issue.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

Are there any ways you think having an ADHD brain has actually helped you with studying?

Laura : Yes! I think my brain comes up with weird, creative ways to remember things that make sense to no one but me.

Shay : I have intentionally only ever chosen to study fields about things that I'm already interested in. So often when I'm in lectures there aren't concepts or ideas that are completely new, because this is an extension of me following my passions which is essentially following the dopamine trail. So allowing myself to make a decision on what to study based on passion rather than “what do I think will actually lead to employment” has helped.

I don't consider my disability to be a superpower, I find that sentiment to be a form of toxic positivity and very patronising. Having either very high levels of focus or no focus, has meant that I only get the work done in hyper focus mode. It’s helpful in the sense that I’m getting work done, but not in the sense that it’s not really a sustainable way to study and leads to burn out. I also reject the idea that having adhd means that I can somehow get 8 hours of work done in 2 hours, that feels too much like an exaggeration and overcompensating for me personally.

I think the areas where it might help is being highly creative and curious. I’m fast to brainstorm, excitable and naturally have a knack of trying to find fun or humour in everything. Whether that be including memes in what could be a very dry oral and slideshow presentation on human rights & environmental law (I got a HD for this group presso).

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

What tips do you have for combating executive dysfunction?

Laura :

Being kind to yourself
Give yourself grace
Allow your mind the space to wander (I think it's healthy)
Taking a break
Being realistic with the chunks of time you can dedicate to studying (smaller chunks are better)

Shay : Starting off doing some other task like cleaning or checking your personal emails is a way of gaining momentum.

I always need an emotional support candle, 3 beverages and a tv show or movie I’ve watched before in order to focus. Basically all of my major assignments were done with the hunger games movies playing in the background.

Take dance breaks when you’re pulling all-nighters, I would also work on these assignments at uni, when I didn’t have the flexibility to get caught procrasi-cleaning. Side note, it is funny to me that maybe someone in security was watching me do the Single Ladies dance in a empty computer lab inbetween long stints of stillness.

Done is better than perfect, when you can actually start doing things you don’t need to overcompensate. That being said if you’re handing something in 5 days late and losing a % of marks each day, taking the time to try to catch any spelling errors to try to avoid losing unnecessary marks is worthwhile.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

Do you have any favourite apps that help you study?

Laura : Pomodoro timer! Doing things in 25 minute increments really helps.

Shay :

The Netflix app - for playing young adult distopian future movies in the background.

YouTube - for playing rainy sounds or coconut mall music or video game soundtracks.

Google calendar - where I mark out every single week of the term, due dates, and weekly reminders with a count down from each due date “one week until X due” “two weeks until X due”.

Among us & royal match - these are games and good for study breaks. I try to give myself only one or two types of activities I can do while taking a break. These are good because it’s doesn’t take long until they get boring. Otherwise I will lose myself down a rabbit hole researching something I’ve never been interested before. When I was in year 12 I became hyper fixated on watching terrible horror films directed by Ed Wood, after exams were done I never came back to it ever again.

I have downloaded lots of apps that’s supposed to be good for adhd but I haven’t opened them and my phone is likely to be out of storage at any given moment hahahahha.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

Have you found anything that helps minimise leaving assessments to the last minute?

Laura : Allowing myself to do something fun first.

time tick GIF by Stephen Maurice Graham

Shay : Not really.

The best thing that has helped was booking appointments with the writing centre, where you would have a tutor that would meet with you or zoom with you, where you had someone else to talk to about the assignment, and could help proofread or talk about “how to structure an essay”.

It was basically a way of creating smaller deadlines to get some work done, with bonus body doubling.

Body doubling is basically a way of regulating yourself with the presence of another person. It’s the reason why it’s easier to clean the house while on the phone or when you have a friend over and they are doing their own thing.

The other aspect I found helpful is that I’ve learnt that I process information, and find it easier to make decisions when I explain it to someone else. Communication with another person requires a level of structure, whereas being left to my own devices with my gremlin brain, everything is much less linear. It’s like detangling a necklace of thoughts and ideas via talking, whereas thinking about it internally just feels like shaking the knotted necklace and hoping it will unravel.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

What has been your proudest moment in regards to your studies?

Shay : It’s cliche but the graduation ceremony, and being able to take photos with my 2 parchments, little hat and cape. Handing in my last assignment felt extremely anti-climatic and I think I actually felt bad about myself pressing submit.

But being included in a bubble of excited people felt good. Having a friend tell me that their grandparents were very impressed with how I’d completed two degrees. It was nice to hear that’s how I was being perceived, when I was focused on how awkward I felt trying to hold both parchments, with my little crab claws while walking across a stage. It’s really easy to get caught up in stressing about the smaller stuff, and not taking a moment to zoom out and to appreciate how far you’ve come.

Im also really proud of the amount of times that I tried again, failing a subject and having to repeat it. Failing, dropping out, applying to studying again, finding the next one too hard, failing, dropping out. Finding the courage to try again. Making the decision that “it’s my hecs debt, so I’ll attend class late, because if I don’t then I won’t be going at all. It’s my money, and I’ll find a way to be unapologetically annoying with how I approach my education”. Deciding to not torture myself over not doing things the right way, or against the grain of social norms, made me massively proud.

Iona_RO · ‎15-06-2023

A huuuge thank you again to Laura and Shay for sharing with us tonight, couple of ADHD legends!

Although the event is over, please feel free to add any questions, thoughts, tips whenever you'd like to - the event will stay here so you can read or interact whenever you like 😊

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