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Hey @Back2TheWall I'm sorry to hear that you're in this situation, I can only imagine how confusing and hard it must feel to not be in control of your mind and behaviour during these moments. I want to start off by saying well done on recognising that you're in this cycle and that you want to change it, that is so huge and i think it definitely needs to acknowledged! BPD can be really tough as there are a number of symptoms and everyone experience them differently. So I think its really good to see that you have considered talking to a health professional about this suspected diagnosis. You mentioned that to him, you probably seem like a really bad person, I was just wondering if you have had a chance to talk to him about this and discussed how it makes each of you feel?
I also just want to remind you that you're not alone 💜 If you would like to talk to someone about this, Kidshelpline can be really helpful as they have the option to chat via webchat or phone