Hi @xXLexi_Lou122Xx ,    I just wanted to say how beautiful I thought your words about ReachOut were, and to me it really summarises what I think is so unique and wonderful about this community, and everyone in it. We are so glad that this community is a useful and safe space for you     ... View more

Eggplant parmigiana!  ... View more

Hi @Eden1717 ,    I'm really sorry to hear that today is a rough one. Having a panic attack like that sounds distressing and exhausting - I hear that you are feeling drained and unsteady, you say that your family may be annoyed at you, but it does sounds like some rest could be really helpful. I think that a lot of us can relate to the frustration when we feel like a day has been ruined, especially when we're trying so hard - I have a friend that used to declare a day a "non-day", where they gave themself permission to just do what they needed to do to make it through, and be kind to themselves. I often remind myself of that, sometimes it is OK to just get through the day. You show so much reslience and strength here.    Do you think you would be able to take some time for yourself to rest and regroup today?      ... View more

Hi @xXLexi_Lou122Xx ,    I can totally understand feeling scared about school starting, it's always a pretty anxious time - I can sometimes take awhile to warm up to new people and places, so I really relate to what you say about feeling like you'll feel antisocial at first.     I think @Esperanza67 's idea of catching up (whether in person or online) with friends from your old school is great - can you plan out something nice for yourself, like trying out a new cafe after school or something, to have something to look forward to during the week? I'm also wondering if you know much about your new school - do they offer any activities that you may be interested in?   I remember not really knowing anyone when I started high school, and there were a lot of cliques from people who went to primary school together ( I was the only person from my primary school to go there) - I really found my tribe through music and the school band programs, other people I know found 'their people' through sport and stuff.    And the community here is always here if you want to have a chat ,or play a game! We are all here to support you, and know that you have a bunch of people who think you're awesome, and have your back   ... View more

Hi @Tiny_leaf ,    Thanks so much for taking the time to update us on everything that's going on for you, and thank you for confirming your safety. I hope it helped a bit to get it all out - we all care about you here, and hope we can support you as much as possible.    It sounds like you are carrying a heavy load at the moment - I'm sorry to hear that your dysphoria is so distressing at the moment, and that you're experiencing hallucinations and psychosis again. To share a bit of personal experience, I have also experienced a chronic pain disorder, and it would often flare up when I was unwell or stressed - thankfully I have now fully recovered but I really feel for you. It can be a long road, but there is hope.    It can often seem like there is a bit of a snowball effect when we're under stress - dealing with the grief of losing your Nana is also a lot to add to your plate. I hope you can be gentle with yourself, you are dealing with so much, and you give so much wonderful support to the community here too. You show so much insight, kindness and generosity in how much you're willing to share with the community members here - I hope that you're also able to take some support back from the community when you need it.    I hear your frustration about how difficult it can be to find the right help and support services - I'm wondering if you can share what services you have found the most helpful in the past? I know that more healthcare professionals are starting to offer telehealth services or eHealth, so that psychologists/ psychiatrists can offer help to people who may be a long way away. Do you think that this is something that you could be interested in?    We are all here for you.        ... View more

I love this idea, thanks for reviving it @Bre-RO !      I read this article last year, and decided to make an effort to check off a bunch of the walks around Sydney that I haven't done. The photo here is from one of my favourite walks in Sydney, and there's so many hidden gems out there. I always feel like a new person after I've been for a hike somewhere pretty.    I've never tried geocaching but have friends who got really into it, especially friends who have moved to new cities. It's a really cool way to get to know somewhere new.      ... View more

@xXLexi_Lou122Xx  from what I've seen of you here on the forums, you're an amazing, intelligent, compassionate person, and I hope you find "your tribe" at your new school. How are you feeling about starting somewhere new?  ... View more

@Anonymous  without ruining the movie with spoilers for you ,it did explore her powers a bit more in a way. I liked the way they fleshed out their back stories in a lot of ways - did you end up seeing it in the end?    I would really like to see the Aladdin movie after reading what you've written, I'm also pretty keen to see the version of Little Women that's out at the moment, everyone I know who has seen it has really loved it :) ... View more

I've been listening the Hamilton soundtrack. I've never seen it in person but a friend told me I'd love it, and she was right. So catchy!      ... View more

Hi @SomeoneNADJS ,    Thanks so much for taking the time to explain all of that, it's good to read the update from R, and thanks for clarifying that you don't want the rest of the system to go inactive. I really admire your honesty and strength in sharing here.    I'm sorry to hear that your appointment with the psychologist didn't go well. It sounds like you were experiencing a lot of dysphoria and felt triggered by a few things about the situation, is that right? It sounds like you've reflected with a lot of insight into what it was about the situation that you found triggering, I hope that your next appointment goes better for you     I hope that all goes well at your support group tomorrow - keep us updated on how you are going. I hope you managed to get a good night's sleep - I've gone through periods where I stayed up super late in holidays (I also used to work night shifts which was terrible for my body clock) - I hope that your sleep cycle gets into a good pattern for you soon :)  ... View more

1. Chatted to my best friend, and arranged to have a lunch and proper catch up over the weekend.  2. Found a super cheesy playlist full of movie soundtrack pieces and songs from musicals to listen to while I work this afternoon 3. Looking forward to walking home this afternoon to get some exercise and me-time, grateful it's not as smoky as it was.  ... View more

@Tiny_leaf  did you get your sushi? @xXLexi_Lou122Xx  sorry to hear you haven't been feeling great, I hope you're doing OK. What have you been drawing?  ... View more

Hi @goldilocks ,    It's nice to hear from you again, I'm sorry that you're having such a rough time at the moment.    Seeing a psychologist sounds like a really positive step for you, and it's great that you're being proactive managing your mental health - taking that step is a huge achievement.    I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling like your family and grandmother don't understand your mental health problems - I think it can often be hard for family members to understand, especially if they don't have any experience or understanding of mental illness themselves. I hear that you're feeling too depressed to work and study - that is a really hard place to be in, and I know other community members have lived through similar things. With the right support, I'm sure you can start to work towards your goals again - you've shown a lot of strength in posting here, and starting to see a psychologist for support.   If you have been experiencing thoughts of suicide, it's also important to discuss those with your psychologist, so that the two of you can help to come up with strategies to keep you safe I hope that this community can continue to support you through this journey, we are here for you.  ... View more

Hi @JDF12 ,    Thanks so much for posting here, we are really glad that you were able to come here for support. A lot of other people in the community here have experienced difficult and traumatic family circumstances, you're not alone. It sounds like it's been an incredibly tough time for you and your family, and I'm so sorry that you are going through this.   Dealing with your parents fighting all of the time, especially if it escalates to emotional abuse, can be incredibly hard to deal with and can take a toll on you. There's a really useful resource on our website and I just thought I'd share the infographic here - it's about ways to make sure you're caring for yourself while your family is going through this. The article that goes along with it is here https://au.reachout.com/articles/how-to-deal-with-your-parents-fighting-all-the-time     I hear you when you say that both your mum and your dad have been emotionally abusive, and your dad sometimes contemplates suicide. It's good to hear that your Dad has been for counselling, and I hope that he's able to seek more help if he needs it.    I'm sorry to hear that your mum hasn't wanted to engage with a counsellor. Do you think she would be open to using an online service or helpline?    You sound like a very caring sibling and son, and I'm sorry that you and your siblings are in this situation. Your safety and wellbeing are really important, and it's okay to need some help to get through this. Do you think that you might find it helpful to talk to a psychologist or a counsellor for support?    You're not alone, the community here has a lot of people who've been through tough times with their families, and I think you've shown a lot of courage in posting here.  ... View more

@Esperanza67  I'm so glad you found it useful, I think Turia Pitt is absolutely amazing. I read her book a couple of years ago and have followed her on instagram ever since. It's great to see her campaign take off so much, and I have heard from relatives that are in areas that were affected by the fires that it's really making a huge difference for local businesses there. I can't always afford to buy all of the pretty things I see posted there - but I have got a few things, and even sharing and liking posts helps a lot.    I have also been making a real effort to focus on the good news stories lately, and I really love the thread that's on the forums here with good news posts. Otherwise the news just feels so depressing, and it's easy to feel really sad and hopeless about the state of the world.  ... View more

Hi @Thisisnotmyname ,    Thank you so much for reaching out here, it takes a lot to have the courage to admit that you may have a problem with alcohol, and you're definitely not alone.    I'm not sure if you've had a chance to check them out, but there's some handy resources on the next steps to take if you're worried about your alcohol use . You say that you have to drink every day to cope, there are lot of services that can help you to reduce your drinking. It's easy to feel down on ourselves, and I hear you when you say you feel like you've ruined your own life - a lot of people have been where you are now, and have been able to transform their lives. There is hope, and there's a community here to support you while you take these next steps.    Do you think you would feel comfortable having a chat to your GP, or calling one of the services that I've listed as a next step?  ... View more

Hi @Esperanza67 ,    I hear you, it's been such a tough time, and my heart goes out to those communities that are having to rebuild, with no real end in sight to the threat of the fires. It's really heartbreaking.    I have some family and friends living in fire-affected areas, and one thing that they've really gotten behind is a few campaigns that have been created to help support small businesses recovering from the fires - even if you're not in a position to buy stuff at the moment, sharing the posts and increasing their reach does have a tangible benefit for those communities. Some of the tourist towns really rely heavily on the business over summer to sustain them through the year and losing that has been really tough.    Turia Pitt has started an amazing campaign called Spend With Them. There's a brief article about it here - she's from a small town on the south coast and also famously survived horrendous injuries from a fire herself.    I also know a lot of people have been knitting pouches for orphaned kangaroos etc, but I just heard that they have been so overwhelmed by the generosity of people making donations that they've actually asked people to pause for a bit.    And one thing I'm planning on doing as soon as I can is making a road trip to the South Coast here in NSW as soon as it's all safe again - I know that a lot of areas are really missing the tourist trade, and visiting them as soon as things are up and running again is great for the morale of those towns as well as a tangible way to help by supporting local businesses.    I hear you - I have been feeling pretty down about it all at times as well ,I think it's a natural response. It's been a terrible time for so many people - but I've also been really heartened by the amazing community spirit that has been shown in so many tiny, and huge, ways by Australians since this all started   ... View more

Hi @SomeoneNADJS ,   Thanks so much for the update. It's great to hear that your mum has been so supportive, but I'm hearing that it is also challenging for you when your mum has been telling people that you are trans and identify as binary female, when you perhaps feel that it isn't the most accurate label for you given that some of your system members identify as gender fluid. Is that right? I just wanted to reassure you that it's a very common experience to feel unsure about where exactly our gender identity 'fits', and there was some really amazing posts made on this topic that I'll link to here, in case you find them helpful. It's wonderful that your mum is being so supportive and accepting, but if you feel like you want to have a bit of space to sit with these things, I think it's also totally OK to set some boundaries with her around what she shares about your identity. Whatever makes you feel the most comfortable.    In regards to your system, you mention "I ’m also scared about our transition. I want to do all of these things, but at the same time they scare me. We still haven’t managed to organise individual roles yet. I also don’t want to be in control of the body as often as I am now, but I’m also scared to step down and be inactive more often. I know I’ve talked about wanting to go inactive before, but I meant that as long-term so I wouldn’t have to wake up for however long".   It sounds like you have had a huge amount to work through, and I can understand that it could feel overwhelming and exhausting.  You mention wanting part of your system to go inactive and not wake up for however long, and I just wanted to check, are you feeling safe at the moment?     I hear your concerns about C - when you're ready to talk about what is happening with her, we are here to listen.    I'm sorry that you are worried about the stigma and transphobia that unfortunately still exists in society. You have shown so much courage, honesty and bravery, and it sounds like you have come a really long way in the last few months in terms of opening up to your family and friends. We are here to support you in your journey.      ... View more

I'm really loving reading through this thread, so many good ideas!    @Milkninja222  that's really interesting what you say about needing to be warm, I find that I almost always have to sleep with the fan on low, even in winter - I find I sleep better when I'm slightly cool, but I like having a doona to snuggle up under. I'm pretty sure the white noise from the ceiling fan helps me as well.    Avoiding bright lights and screens has helped me massively - I always have my phone or tablet on night mode after 8pm, so there's less blue light which apparently is terrible for your circadian rhythms, I do read a lot of books on my phone at night, but always with the screen light on really low.    @statuscaring  will be interested to hear how you go with reading more slowly and mindfully at night - keep us posted on how it goes! I've always read at night, but I try and read books I've already read before, because I have made the mistake of reading a new book, getting carried away and suddenly realising it's 2am        ... View more

@Tiny_leaf  I'm sorry to hear that the conversation with your mum was made a bit trickier with your brother interjecting, that sounds pretty frustrating - but it's great that you were able to chat a bit about some of the health at every size principles, and it sounds like you were able to help her to see that there's some complexities there that she hasn't been aware of. I think that's really fantastic - hopefully it will plant a seed for her. Like you've said, unhelpful ideas about food/ dieting/ weight can be so deeply ingrained in us, so I think it's excellent that you were able to have a conversation with her that challenged those thoughts a bit.    I used to live near a pretty fancy Japanese restaurant, and their tempura was out of this world! The best I've had outside of Japan, and now I am craving it ;)    I think you show a lot of self-awareness about how researching this stuff can increase unhelpful anxiety around food - maybe mindful eating could be a good thing to check out when you have the chance :)  ... View more

Hi @goldilocks ,    Sorry if I wasn't clear - I just wanted to clarify that when he is threatening to report you to the police for being a threat to his marriage, that's definitely not something he can do. It sounds like he is the one that is breaking the law, you are definitely not breaking the law.    I am sorry that you didn't have success when you tried to report him, do you think you would feel comfortable calling 1800 RESPECT? They have specially trained counsellors who can also talk you through your rights in this situation and advise you on the best course of action to take.    I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling, you say "I understand that this is toxic, but it is addictive, and I cant help but go running back to him" -  you are worthy of being treated with respect. The community is here to support you   ... View more

English breakfast tea :) ... View more

Hi @Hozzles , just wanted to quickly check in with you-    It sounds like that was a pretty unhelpful experience with your job search provider, and I hope you're feeling OK. A lot of people take longer than they planned to at uni (I know I did!), and the fact that you've made so much progress with your own mental health shows what a strong, intelligent person you are. Your volunteer work and study at uni while also managing your own mental health is a testament to your strength and resilience.    I hear your frustration about not being able to afford to see a psychiatrist privately, it's unfortunately a common experience. Some psychiatrists are able to offer a sliding scale for students, this might be something that your GP could be able to look in to on your behalf if you're interested?    I really liked @ayrc_1904 's idea of working on small steps like making phone calls in a zero stress environment - from what you've written, it really does sounds like you've come through a lot. So even though it can be easy to beat ourselves up about not being able to do 'simple' things, it's also worth being kind to yourself and remembering how far you've come. The fact that you did the Grand Canyon by yourself shows that you have courage and strength - isn't it amazing!! I went there a few years ago and we were lucky enough to stay in a lodge that's right near the lip of the Canyon itself, I walked along the rim as the sun was setting and it was one of my favourite moments of the trip. Such an awesome place - and I'm sure when the time is right, you'll have many more adventures :)     ... View more

It's a tie, a really good mango, or raspberries.   Favourite animal at the zoo?  ... View more

My new keep cup :)   Turquoise?  ... View more

Hey @SomeoneNADJS , thanks A for updating us on everything.    I hear most of you have a lot on your mind at the moment, I think a lot of us can relate to feeling really sad, and anxious about the future with the current bushfire crisis. I think R's plan to donate money is a really great way to do something to help other people, I know that I have done the same (to Wires, the RFS and the Red Cross) and it helped me to feel that I was at least helping to do something positive - and I find it incredibly inspiring to see how much money Australian communities have raised. Every dollar counts and to me, it's a reminder that there's hope, and so much reslience, in communities. The everyday acts of kindness I've seen in the media over the last week have given me hope for the future, from little kids in my neighbourhood doing lemonade stands to raise money for our local fire brigade, to Elton John donating a million dollars to fire relief yesterday.    The bushfire coping thread also has some great ideas and shared experiences from the community, when you have time to check it out :)   Please don't worry about sounding crazy when you speak about system stuff here - it's a safe space for you, and the community has your back. I hope you managed to get some sleep :)  ... View more

Hi @Clementine75 , it sounds like you're being really proactive in looking for ways to cope with these thoughts, which is amazing. You've mentioned your psychologist is on holidays at the moment, do you think you'd be able to make an appointment for when they're back? It might be helpful to talk through ways to keep yourself safe and strategies you can use to ease your distress when things get really intense - it can be really hard to control feelings like these, it's important to remember that those feelings will pass eventually. It's great to hear that you do have some activities that can help to take your mind off them, what are your favourite things to try?  ... View more