Hey @heyitsbea, Sorry to hear you're feeling overwhelmed by your expectations. It's good that you seem to be doing well in school by most people's standards, but sometimes we and others can hold ourselves to an unfair standard that we feel we can't keep to, which is hurtful. You say your parents and teachers are all counting on you to do well. Could you please tell us if that's something they've said to you directly, or if it's more of a vibe you get from them? Regardless, do you think it might help if you could speak to them about how the expectations you're feeling are hurting you? It's okay if that sounds too intimidating or that it otherwise wouldn't help; perhaps there's a school counsellor you could talk to about how you're feeling. Also, do you think you know why you get these feelings of emptiness if you aren't doing something 'productive'? Maybe it could help you work through these feelings if you can identify why you get this feeling, as you could then start to work on addressing the cause. At any rate, it sounds like you're a very conscientious person (which is a good thing), but we don't want you to feel bad if you're not being productive all the time, especially if it's taking a toll on your wellbeing. Hopefully, you can get to a place where you can feel good about your hard work, rather than feeling you haven't done enough. I hope your first day went well, and good luck this term.
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