I am not going to say that I wasn't gullible because I believe that I was very gullible at the time. I was in my 3rd relationship and this one actually was with someone who was really nice... or so I thought. He kept asking when we could have sex though (which I had refrained from because of my religion) and at that point I started to think that if I had sex with him maybe he would stay maybe he wouldn't get bored and just leave me like the rest. I started to think that if I didn't have sex with him that he would just leave too and I didn't want that to happen but I didn't want to loose my virginity either. The first time he came over it seemed all he wanted to do was kiss me and I just make myself be okay with it. The first time I went to his house we were making out a bit and he really wanted to have sex so I agreed but started having really strong second thoughts and told him to wait and I was going to say no but he started getting all annoyed at me and I was worried that it would just happen anyway so I said okay.. not really sure if that counts. I was shaking and was scared that it actually was happening I felt trapped and tried to tell myself that if I did this then he would stay he would keep loving me that is was okay. It didn't feel okay. first I actually pushed him out I guess as a reflex but then he tried going back in a couple times and gave up. Later he would bring it up and seem very annoyed that I pushed him out. Sometimes when we were kissing he would force me back on the bed and wouldn't let me up again making me feel trapped again and scared of what could happen. He pressured me for oral sex and I gave in because he just got annoyed at me otherwise but I never said yes. We broke up and I felt very used and violated in some cases and I hated myself for not saying no. So I am not really sure if I have been sexually taken advantage of since I kinda agreed to keep him happy and was pressured a lot into other stuff like oral and he was trying to pressure me into anal but I kept saying no which is why I think he left in the end or he just got bored of me who knows. I feel so used and I don't know if this counts as being taken advantage of or not but it feels like it to me? Thoughts?
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