Hey guys this is my first post here, sorry if I posted this on the wrong section or anything. Basically, I just feel like there's nothing good about me. Whenever I try to improve myself by going outside my comfort zone, exercising, trying new things, etc, it never goes well and I always end up giving up. I use to think all I have is my looks and my fitness, but now I don't even have those. I'm pretty stupid, socially awkward and can be unnecessarily hostile, emotionless and submissive in many situations. Most of my friends never reach out to me anymore (except one) and some even completely ignore my texts and calls now. Whenever I tell my parents my problems (or at least try to, because It's very hard for me to open up), they just tell me that their life was 100x tougher, I'm extremely lucky, I'm just being a bitch/pussy, etc. They discouraged me from following my dream of becoming a sport star, explaining that I simply don't have what it takes (I've accepted this now) and are pressuring me to go to university and get a corporate job even though I'm not passionate about any of the courses and I'm almost flunking arguably the easiest course. At this point, I'm not exactly suicidal, but I'm considering running away from home because I feel like an utter disgrace to my family (I almost did yesterday). I'm tempted to start living completely carelessly and see where it takes me because I'm really losing control of myself.
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