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(TW) Struggling

I'm not feeling great at the moment. A bit numb. And lonely. 

 

I wish I could just sit down with someone and tell them everything and cry with them. 

 

Spoiler
And I've been having a few thoughts of self-harm but they're manageable and I'm safe. But I wish I could just so people would see I'm not ok.

In fact, I wish just two people would see. I just need to talk to people, because I can't do this by myself. 

 

Anyway, I'm safe. Doing some cleaning with my music playing.

 

If I need to, I will chat with Headspace or something like that.

Lemon_Dolphin
Lemon_DolphinPosted 08-03-2024 10:29 AM

Comments

 
Astra-RO
Astra-ROPosted 08-03-2024 11:20 AM

Hey @Lemon_Dolphin,

Thank you for letting us know how you've been going and that you are safe. It sounds like you're really struggling and I can hear that you're wanting someone to see you and acknowledge your pain. We see you, and this isn't something you have to go through alone. It sounds like the thoughts of self-harm are coming from this place of wanting to be seen and I'm wondering if it could be worth exploring if there is another way of being seen which doesn't involve hurting yourself? I wonder if this is something you have, or might like to explore with your counsellor? 

 

You mentioned that there are two people who you want to see you. Are these people you could talk to about what's been going on? We have an article here about talking to someone you trust, if that could be helpful? We also have some information on self-help for self harm as well. 

 

We'll be sending you an email soon so please keep an eye out!

 
 
Lemon_Dolphin
Lemon_DolphinPosted 08-03-2024 01:02 PM

Hey @Astra-RO 

Yeah, definitely something to discuss with my counselor.

 

I can only really talk to one of those people, but I always feel like a burden. And I feel like she doesn't give me the type of support I want. I mean, it's still good when I do talk to her. But I also only really message her and I want to talk in person by privately too, which doesn't really happen.

 

Thanks, I'll have a look at those sometime today.

 
 
 
PigeonPaige
PigeonPaigePosted 09-03-2024 01:53 AM

Hi, 


I know exactly what you mean by the burden part, it's not like there are multiple people that you can share the load with, which sucks too. I am in the same boat with that one. But, you can also remember that, just as much as you don't want to burden others, you shouldn't make it a burden for yourself either, and maybe between the two of you it can be less of a burden on you both, if you share it. If you want to talk to her in person, I'm sure you could, and I have learnt that mostly when people say that they are there for you, they do want to be there for you, especially if they have in the past. 

 

I hope you find all the happiness, and really I wish you the best. Take it minute by minute, the day by day thing never works, it's too much pressure, simply minute by minute. One breath at a time.

 

I find that getting outside and feeling the breeze, or sun, on your skin, or for me looking at the stars just allows me to somehow breathe a bit better. Maybe find your own version of that? Or if you have with the music, keep with it. There is no wrong solution, if it helps.

Sending love.

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