ive been feeling really lost.
havent posted in a while, had a rough time, i currently feel sorta lost, i dont find anything fun anymore, i keep trying but i cant put any effort into my work at school, i cant put any time aside for my friends, all ive been doing is sitting down and just watching youtube (i dont want to but i need something to distract me form being so bord), sleeping or just wanding from room to room. i know i should get over it but ive had such a bad run these last few months, late last year i found out my bf at the time only dated me for my money and to show off to his friends, broke up obv, then a month later i had a fight with one of my closest friends (we mad up but it really hurt what was said), then about 3 months ago i started seeing a therapist, and while it went well to start with, i dunno i just kind of gave up, i lost the neregy i was using to go there, to talk to practice my mental wellbeing activitys, and that just makes me feel so lazy, along with everything else i just felt so damn lazy for a while and still do, then earlier this month it just hit me randomly, i keep trying to get better but each time i do i give up because something goes wrong, ive got such a fragile work ethic if a single thing goes wrong when im trying to get better i foucs on that and just give up trying to be happy again, and now im just stuck feeling like the only reason im like this is because i want to be and prefer being lazy, but i still get such a nawing feeling whenever i ignore another thing i need to do.
i dunno, i just find myself so confused these days, and they feel so fast yet painfuly slow at the same time, like each day is a sludge but the weeks fly by, my mind keeps thinking in these confusing loops, like ill think on how bad my life is then on how good it is and how im just being down for no reason and being anoyying to everyone around me then feel worse by thinking that and it starts again, i feel so sorry for my friends and family who have to put up with me even though i try my hardest not to be down around them, hey, at least i got a few assinments in on time this term. i really need to work more this year, need to get a high atar. (also hi guys hope your all doing well!)
Comments
Hi @Spring_Mink 
It sounds like you're going through a tough time, so it's great that you've decided to reach out and acknowledge that this is something you'd like some help with. I'm sorry that you're feeling unmotivated, lost and confused, it is definitely something that happens to a lot of people.
I think that "watering your own garden" which includes focusing on yourself and your mental wellbeing is the start to enjoying life again, as you've mentioned. Are there some skills/ self-care activities that you enjoy that will make you feel a little bit better? This may be hanging with friends/ family, reading, drawing or playing sport.
Even though you don't feel as though you are being productive, it is a tough job balancing your final year of school, friendships, family and anything else you may have going on. You're doing an awesome job!
It might be a good idea to start a daily journal of documenting your moods for the day and a rose and a thorn. A rose refers to something good from the day, and a thorn refers to something that may not have been great. Then, you can look back on your days and remind yourself of the good things that happen instead of being stuck in a loop of only focusing on the positives or negatives.
Also, if you are ready to take that step again, it may be worth seeing your therapist again (if you found them helpful the first time), but I definitely know how difficult it can be to make the first step so it's great you've decided to reach out to the community for support!
I hope this is helpful, please reach out again if you ever need to 🙂
Hey @Spring_Mink,
That sounds like such a tough place to be in, and I’m really sorry you’re feeling this way. It makes complete sense that after everything you’ve been through with regards to losing trust in someone you cared about, going through a rough patch with a close friend, and feeling like you keep hitting walls with therapy and school.
It’s really frustrating when you’re trying to get back on track, but even small setbacks feel like they knock you all the way back down. That doesn’t mean you’re not trying or that you’re not strong, it just means you’ve been dealing with more than anyone should have to at once. And even though it doesn’t feel like it, you are making progress, even in small ways, like getting those assignments in. That’s something.
I know it’s easy to get caught in that cycle of overthinking, where you start questioning whether things are actually bad or if you’re just making a big deal out of them, but your feelings are real. You’re not being annoying, and you’re definitely not a burden to the people around you. They care about you because you matter to them, not because you have to be "happy" all the time.
Maybe instead of focusing on fixing everything at once, it would be helpful to take things one step at a time. Even something small, like setting a tiny goal for the day (even if it's just getting out of bed at a certain time or listening to music you like), could help break up that feeling of being stuck. Here's an awesome article about self-care tips and the Peer Chat service provided by ReachOut, in case you'd find either of them helpful.
Please know the ReachOut community will always be here to listen and support you. 💛
Hi @Spring_Mink,
Welcome back to the community and thank you for opening up about what’s been going on for you at the moment, we are here to support you 😊
It sounds like it’s been a challenging and intense couple of months and it’s understandable if you might be feeling drained and overwhelmed with managing everything. Experiencing a relationship breakup and friendship conflict can be heavy and I can hear how painful it has been to go through these.
I’m sorry to hear that you’re feeling lost and can’t seem to find anything fun or fulfilling, I can imagine that being hard to experience while also trying to look after your mental wellbeing. It can be tough to find the motivation we need and it’s okay if this has been extra hard lately, it sounds like you’re managing and balancing a lot at once. Feeling like time is going so slow but fast at the same time can be confronting and unsettling to experience and it’s absolutely valid if you’re feeling stuck in this cycle, this is a lot for anyone to feel.
I’m wondering what has helped you cope through this or is there any self-care that has helped alleviate some of these low feelings?
I also want to acknowledge the strength and resilience you have in looking after yourself and wanting to feel better. Mental health recovery can feel like an exhausting journey but it’s amazing to see how much self-insight you have and the courage to get some support. It sounds like you try and hold a lot of hope and put a brave face in front of everyone, but these feelings are all valid and you deserve to feel supported through this.
This can be challenging to experience alone, have you been able to open up and get support from your friends or family about how you’re feeling?
You might be interested in checking out this resource about getting and staying motivated and this other resource about coping strategies during tough times.
Thank you again for opening up and sharing with the community, it’s great to have you back 😊
