hey gorgeous! @IsabellasRecovery   honestly urges are so hard !! many of the community like @gina-RO say ride the wave which is easier said than done ! have you made a self-love playlist ? the beautiful @Bee has a thread over here of self-love songs :)    im going to tag some of the community who can give you some lovely advice and support  @scared01 @annabethxchase @DruidChild @Bee  @letitgo @lokifish @Jess1-RO @gina-RO ... View more

1. played the nintendo switch:) 2. have watched a lot of netflix  3. bought a new shirt !! 4. almost got squashed by a refrigerator, great timessss😬 ... View more

thank you  mum gave me some medication last night and i went to bed early @queenP   @TOM-RO i was safe. all my mind is thinking is about suicide. im safe but fuck my thoughts  ... View more

thanks, just i don’t know what to do anymore. all i can think of is suicide, suicide, suicide and repeat all over again ! @Eden1717 ... View more

thanks @Eden1717 khl almost called an ambulance on me :( i am safe it’s just the thoughts are so intense and im just really over this ... View more

im really struggling tonight :( ... View more

he wants me to start off with the one on one stuff and wait till i get a bit older since there isn’t really any groups around my age @Eden1717 ... View more

so he thinks i have bdp and so do i but because im too young he won’t diagnose me with a personality disorder. so i have emerging bpd, i honestly match bdp perfectly but of course im not a psych @Eden1717 he is also getting me to start DBT and he wants me to connect to a new crisis team in a different suburb but he isn’t sure if they’ll accept me !  ... View more

1. saw my psychiatrist:) 2. got a really good hot chocolate !  3. watched some netflix 4. ate a bit too much chocolate because i was a a very low point during the day :( but the chocolate was good haha 5. spoke to a supervisor from khl and it went well :) ... View more

yep :( @gina-RO   just spoke to a supervisor from khl and that went really well. she was really sorry about what had happened and she said she knows my counsellor really well and knows she would never intend to upset me. i got into a bit of trouble though for some threats i made but i told them i didn’t mean it and it was just in the moment of frustration.  ... View more

mum and i aren’t on speaking terms so i can’t go to ED, im too scared anyways to say im not okay @gina-RO ... View more

well i needed to talk to khl about how they’ve been treating me and have been requesting to speak to their supervisors for quite sometime @gina-RO thankfully they should be calling me sometime today.    i saw my psychiatrist today and he said i have emerging bdp so at least that helps to know why i have these sudden episodes of rage ! mum and i are in a fight now because im frustrated with life and now she is slamming everything ERGHH fucking trigger. now im having very intense thoughts of killing myself or hurting someone else. i just want to go to ED ffs. im safe ffs ... View more

1. played with maggie for a long time and she was very cute ! 2. ate chocolate  3. watched big little lies  ... View more

haha yeah ! @letitgo   i just can’t bare look at them expect for @gina-RO‘s, the others is my khl counsellor and i hate her. and the other one is @annabethxchase and i miss her so much :( ill write out more tomorrow, like the nice message you wrote above :)   so i spoke to khl and it didn’t turn out great. i was being super aggressive and swearing a lot to this poor counsellor. i was also bitching about my counsellor to her oops. i than started asking to talk to her supervisor, so they are going to call me tomorrow. i also started to threaten to hurt them and myself. i just can’t handle situations like these well. they are too emotional and distressing for me so my defence is to be aggressive whether that’s to them or myself. i am safe unfortunately erghhhhh ... View more

definitely have messy hair right now ! @gina-RO ive been hurting since yesterday at 4 :( it’s more than a wave. i just keep beating up (mentally not physically) myself about triggering situations. im just over this and at the last straw to be honest :( ... View more

erghhh i don’t want to be safe at all, i want to be dead !! im not sure how much longer im going to last :( i feel the need to say im safe but ergh idk fine ill be safe. but the whole question “are you safe?” drives my head in and makes me feel worse @Jay-RO   well you can believe that but in my fucking daily life I am NOTHING !    i don’t want to look at any of them. my khl counsellor is one of them and ERGHHH i wish i could ********. and the other one is annabeth and she isn’t around any more so i don’t want to think about that. i can’t be fucked, positivity is shit ... View more

you have no need to be sorry, im sorry if i has upset you @Bananatime04   but im nothing and nobody gives a shit about me ... View more

it’s the fucking truth !! i mean NOTHING, I am NOBODY @Bananatime04 ... View more

please don’t kill yourself - Clayton Jennings  ... View more

it’s too much 😭😭😭 i don’t mean anything to anyone, i want to die ... View more

sorry it wasn’t directed at you, im just feeling really horrible @Eden1717   @Jay-RO my GP knows i don’t like my psych but she doesn’t know about the specialist GP.   ive just been watching big little lies and eating chocolate ... View more

im not talking to my psych about it. she is a shit psych and she doesn’t care about me. she isn’t the one okay ffs @Eden1717 idk sleep ... View more

i sent them an email last week, im fucking done with them okay @Jay-RO   yeah i hate this specialist GP, the whole time i was thinking of ways to kill myself. i hate her so much she made me feel awful and so ANGRY ! i know feel awful, im safe i guess but i just wanna die ... View more

thank you   @linkinpark13   im currently waiting to see some specialist GP and she is running late ergh. just not in a great place and wanna sleep and eat chocolate  ... View more

im not even gonna bother explaining the khl situation because nobody seems to understand @Eden1717   i was with a local crisis team similar to CAMHS but Mum doesn’t like me being with the public mental health system so i don’t think CAMHS is an option.    my psych was just being super triggering and making me super angry so i kinda just bursted  ... View more