Hi @Bookworm2004,   I know some experts recommend not to listen to music but I always listen to Lofi HipHop without lyrics on youtube (chilledcow is my favourite) while I study and I just headphones cause it helps me to zone out other distractions. When I'm feeling really emotional and can't setting into study I try and go for a walk for 5 minutes without my phone and take some deep breaths. Other than that, I found the best thing to do when I have exams coming up is to section my study days. I write a schedule of when I'm going to take breaks and when I'm going to study and I try to make it realistic. If I can only sit for 20 minutes I do 20 minute chunks with a 5 minute break or something like that, and I make sure to add in longer breaks for lunch and dinner etc. I schedule everything including waking up, showering, eating breakfast. Then when I stick to it I can cross it off and keep track of how long I've been studying for and I feel a sense of acheivement. Usually that helps me to feel calmer.    I also use the app Study Bunny which has a cute bunny that helps me keep on track when I'm studying (and tracks my study chunks) and I use apps to block distracting websites on my phone and computer.   ... View more

Hey @hellofriend,   That does sound like you've had some negative experiences. From what you've said, it seems that the most important things to you might be having someone who shows that they actually understand what is going on for you, and not having suggestions quickly offered. Maybe the KHL counsellor felt better for you because they were a counsellor and their role was primarily to listen and support rather than do therapy?   I'm getting that vibe from this sentence you wrote here: "Over a long period they became someone who really understood what was happening, definitely cared, were happy to pretty endlessly talk things through, and having that support on an ongoing basis made me feel less alone."   That sounds amazing. How positive to have someone who was supportive and wanted to listen. That counsellor sounds like were really good.   I always feel better when I have someone supporting me who doesn't make me feel like they're the expert and I'm the novice, but rather that we're on equal footing and that I actually know more about my life and what will work and what won't. Sounds like that hasn't been happening when you've seen some psychs and I hope that maybe you will be able to find someone who is like that, 'cause mental health professionals like that are out there.    You've done so much and come so far already, I know it can be really exhausting to deal with the system <3 ... View more

That sounds like my idea of heaven @Janine-RO! Podcasts, pasta and rain! ... View more

Hey everyone,   I'm so glad this is a thread, I've been needing this in my life. As someone who already experiences quite a lot of worry and stress in my everyday life, I've felt pretty crap about this coronavirus stuff. It hit me like a tonne of bricks on Saturday when I realised my work may have to shut down at some point, and that my uni might shut down. Operative word here is "might" but it's still a bit scary.   So what have I been doing about it? 1. Resisted the urge to panic buy a tonne of items by going supermarket shopping with my friend and partner. That way, we could reassure each other that we don't need to buy 47 packets of pasta just because everyone else seems to be doing that. Thankfully the supermarkets now have signs up letting people know they can only buy a limited amount of things, but seeing bare shelves is a bit confronting. Also recognising my priviledge that I don't have to deal with scarcity in my every day life and that I usually don't even have to think about whether there will be food on the shelves at the supermarket. We are SO lucky in Australia.    2. Taking a break from constantly consuming news and social media.    3. Completing my uni work and trying (as much as possible) to go about my everyday activities as normally as possible, without putting myself in danger. This meant going to the doctor even though I was afraid of doing so, because I had to get a renewal on my mental health plan and results from a screening I did. I was worried but the doctor was completely fine, I didn't have to wait long and I sanitised when I left.    4. Got some sunshine and played with my pet. Pets are awesome! SELF CARE!   I hope you all are doing okay. I feel for anyone with mental health problems or who is going through a time time with the coronavirus stuff. It absolutely sucks but also there are things we can try and do to help us feel a bit better.  ... View more

Hey @Eden1717,   Sounds like it was a really big thing for you to tell your sisters and mum. I'm sorry your mum said some triggering things about your eating. I'm so sorry that she isn't supportive. Family can really f*** with our body image and self image. It might be helpful to remember that no matter what any member of your family thinks, you are more than any labels others may attach to you. People use labels and categories because it helps them to "easily understand" (even if they're not understanding you at all). You are you and you are worthy of love.    I think it's amazing that you told your family about how you were feeling about your sexuality. I firmly believe that labels can be helpful, but not always. I don't really identify with the whole straight label, although everyone else in my life calls me that because I am a female dating a male...and that's how the world chooses to categorise me so they can put me in a box so I'm easy to understand. But...life just isn't like that. Sexuality isn't like that for a lot of people. I just want to tell you that you're completely normal. It's okay to feel however you want to feel. You are a worthy person regardless of your sexuality, weight or anything else. We value you on RO .   ... View more

Hey everyone,    I really like the idea of this thread because sometimes you can feel a bit 'dramatic' for want of a better word in sharing what's going on for you in your own separate thread. That way you can just let it out and if someone wants to respond that's cool, but if they don't want to that's also fine?   Anyway, today I'm having a tough time because I'm feeling worried that my workplace is going to shut down because of COVID-19 and that I'll be left without an income. This is totally out of my control but it still stresses me out a bit.  ... View more

Hey @hellofriend,   I'm sorry you're going through this. It's really hard to maintain boundaries with our family sometimes. When people operate from a place of hurt, or they are unhealed themselves, they can really hurt the people around them too. I'm interested in hearing about your experiences with past mental health professionals. I'm wondering what you have tried, what in particular was unhelpful and what was helpful? I know you said you found the KHL counsellor helpful in some way, what was helpful about that?   ... View more

Hey @Leviathan,   I can tell it took a lot to write that message. I think you're really brave for sharing what's going on for you. Family is really tough. Sometimes I think the things our family do to us hurt a lot more as we get older, because we're able to fully understand that what they're doing is wrong. It can also hurt to realise that they may never change. All we can do is work on ourselves, and encourage other people to work on themselves, but we can't change other people.    I think there are so many positives in what you've shared. First of all, you are in touch with how you're feeling and able to speak your mind (even if it's online in a safe space like RO). You have your girlfriend who seems to be able to understand some of what you're going through, and you're able to help each other through the tough times. You're also able to see that the way that you've been treated in the past is wrong, and that you don't deserve to be treated like that in the future. You have such bravery to talk about the sexual assault. I'm glad that there were people supporting you through that, it sounds like it would have been really hard to go through something so difficult.    Coming on RO is an awesome first step. The others have shared many amazing resources. Take it one small step at a time. Sending you all the good thoughts!   ... View more

Hi @Bookworm2004,   Sounds like you're dealing with a lot at the moment. Year 11 and 12 can be hugely stressful years, and it doesn't help that parents and teachers can pile on the pressure even more. I remember when I was in 11/12 I felt really stressed a lot of the time. I wish I could go back and talk to past self and let me know that everything was going to be okay. It sounds like you've been really diligent in letting your teachers know how you're feeling. I'm wondering if you could tell me a bit more about the other complications if they're important to how you're feeling? It's hard to give you advice on what to do because I don't know exactly the situation you're in, but I can definitely link to a few resources here on RO if that's helpful to you? Ultimately, you are the expert on your own stress levels, so I'm wondering if there's anything you've done in the past that's helped you to feel less stressed? ... View more

Yes, I have a really huge mug (we're talking the size of my head) that has my initial on it in gold. I looooove it! ... View more

Hi everyone, I love this topic! I often lack the motivation to do very small tasks like get out of bed or get off my phone and talk to someone in real life. I also often cancel appointments or extend deadlines on things because I want to avoid 'feeling bad' which is crap but also it's something I'm working on. To be honest I try to pair something unenjoyable such as cleaning with something enjoyable such as listening to a podcast. That's a hack that I used for most of my housework and it definitely is more motivating that way. ... View more

Today I practised self-care by making myself a cup of tea when I was feeling really down. ... View more

Hey everyone, I really like this activity because I'm starting a new course at a new uni this week so can definitely relate!   What are some reasons that you have for wanting to meet someone new? I really want to meet new people because I think you can learn a lot from different people. It's good also to have different groups of people you see at different times because sometimes you might not be on good terms with a friend or group of people for whatever reason, or you might need a break from them. It can take the pressure off needing one person or a group of friends to fulfil all your social/friendship needs.  What are some strategies you find help with meeting new people? Meeting new people can be quite intimidating if you're in a social situation where you know no one. I recently went to a uni O Day event where I knew no-one. I was really nervous on the day, but I forced myself to go up to some people who were waiting to go into the room and say "Are you here for the course introduction?". From then, I just asked them which stream they were doing in the course and then it sort of broke the ice. I think it's helpful to remember people are probably as nervous as you in that sort of situation, and that they aren't going to be rude or ignore you.  Another tip is to force yourself to go to social events, even if you don't really feel like it. It's super easy to stay isolated if you're a more introverted person, but sometimes it's important to get out of your comfort zone and go with a friend to a party or hangout, or sign up to a class or club so you can meet people with shared interests. If you can't think of anything to talk about with someone, a genuine compliment can be a good way to open a conversation.  What have you found to be most difficult with meeting new people? It's hard to meet new people if you live in a small town because there isn't a wide range of people, and it can feel like you're not ever going to find 'your people' sometimes. I've experienced this before and it's really hard. Again the most important thing is to try and push yourself a bit out of your comfort zone and go to events and meetups if you can. ... View more

One of my favourites is in my signature (is that what you call it haha?). It's from Turtles All the Way Down by John Green. In the book, the protagonist is living with OCD and reading it really was a) validating as someone who experiences differing levels of anxiety on a daily basis and b) helped me understand more about OCD and the experience of those who live with it. The author experiences OCD and elements of the book are drawn from his life. The quote is "Your now is not your forever". I think it's a really great quote in terms of thinking about mental health or life struggles. I say this quote to myself when I'm feeling depressed or anxious, because I know that there will be a time that I won't feel what I'm feeling now. It's also a good quote in terms of mindfulness and appreciating the moment you're in right now, because time keeps on moving. ... View more

Sounds like you have a lot of different things to manage @xXLexi_Lou122Xx. I can completely relate to finding Summer a bit boring because I'm not at uni, so I find that if my work isn't giving me that many shifts that I can feel quite bored or useless! I try to schedule in self-care stuff during this time though, because I feel like I need it more.    What things do you commit your time to? e.g. school work, family, hobbies. Do you find it easy or hard to manage your schedule? - Uni (doing my Masters this year) - Part time work - Spending time with my partner and friends - Spending time with family - Managing to do some self-care and relax - Looking after and spending time with my cat - Trying to get my thesis published    I'm quite a procrastinator so I try really hard to set out strict schedules for my days in order to be productive. I often get burnt out, but at the same time, I've achieved a lot over the years so I must be reasonably good at managing my time haha.  I feel like I could be better though, which is why I've taken up bullet journaling in order to schedule and plan more effectively.  ... View more

I'm proud of you @MB95, there is absolutely no shame in being on medication (I've been there and so many others have as well). I'm proud of you for recognising the challenges you're facing and doing the best thing for you.   ... View more

Hey @MB95,   I definitely understand feeling a bit dissapointed that you don't have any iron deficiencies etc and that the reason for your fatigue is your mental health. I think deep down many people feel that physical issues are easier to deal with (whether or not that is the case) because working on your mental health is such a huge undertaking. However, the fact that you've even checked in on your iron and B12 levels is a really great proactive step you've taken in helping yourself. You should be proud of that!   I can understand feeling daunted about tapering your medication. If you're having second thoughts, it's completely fine to stay on them for now and reassess later down the track. In medication can help us to feel a bit more stable and therapy can really help get to the root cause of what's happening and help you form better habits and understand your behaviour better. Sometimes we have really high expectations of what medication can do, but you've also got to put in the hard work too (which I know you've been doing). Whatever you decide, I know you'll do the right thing for you.  ... View more

Hey @BAILEY_, Sounds like you're feeling pretty worried about losing this person because they're really important to you. Are these mood swings normal for you, or is it a new thing?  ... View more

That sounds really tough @Tiny_leaf. My sister struggles with disordered eating. It's really difficult for her too so while I haven't been through exactly what you've been through, I can kind of relate. Is there anything that is even mildly appetising for you. Or maybe you could have some water just to stay hydrated? ... View more

Hey @Bee,   I'm so so sorry you're going through all this, sounds like a hell of a lot to deal with. You are a really strong person, I've seen that here on the forums. I think you've been able to really reflect well on what you're going through and the struggles you're currently facing. This is great because it will help you find the answers eventually. Is there anything you can do for yourself right now to help you unwind and feel safe and secure?  ... View more

Hey @xXLexi_Lou122Xx, that completely sucks. Did you get through the trip ok?  ... View more

Hey @Tiny_leaf,   Is there anything, in particular, that's going on right now for you, apart from the usual stuff?  ... View more

Hey @MB95,   It's always a good idea to have your iron and B12 etc checked. Good on you for being proactive and taking charge of your health with your GP, even if you don't have a great relationship with her.  Maybe you could ask your psychologist for a good recommendation for a GP, my psych actually recommended a great GP for me and often people in health fields know each other and share referrals.  ... View more

1. Made some tofu and black bean tacos and I'm very excited to eat them! 2. Got organised and accomplished some tasks I've been putting off today 3. Enjoyed some sunshine and painted outside! ... View more

Hey @MB95,   I'm so proud of you, being in nature can be so healing.   ... View more

Today I practised self-care by going to yoga in the morning. It felt good to move my body. ... View more

Hi @Jess1-RO,   I don't have a self-care kit yet. To be honest, I struggle a lot with self-care and don't have much spare income at the moment, so the kind of things I'd like to put in my self-care kit aren't really within my access/or things I struggle to believe that I deserve to have. Sorry to be negative, I'm not in the greatest headspace to think about this right now, but I'll come back when I'm feeling a bit better and have a good answer for you!  ... View more

Hi @MB95,   Thanks for acknowledging my post. I'm glad other users have also been able to help you. I'm just finding this thread really triggering at the moment and I think I need to take a step back. A lot of what you're writing about is just hitting way too close to home, which is not your fault at all but I don't think I can respond without becoming really distressed and I don't want to distress anyone else on here. I support you and know you will do the best thing for you. Stay strong :) ... View more

Hey @MB95,   I'm sorry things have been so tough for you. That really sucks and I wish there was more I could do for you, but I'll offer my words of support.   I completely get feeling like your psychologist has made things worse, I've definitely felt that way in the past. I'm wondering if I might be able to shed a bit of light onto some of her actions (obviously I don't know her and your situation intimately, but I have also seen psychologists on and off for many years. I have seen my current psychologist for 3 years now).   1) The trauma stuff. I can also completely get where you're coming from. If you're not ready to talk about it, the number one thing that I would do in your situation is to just be firm and say that you'd prefer to focus on x, y z (i.e. your current major issues). I think that unpacking trauma is important to get to the deeper causes or reasons for what you're feeling, but it needs to be something that's done when you feel ready to do it. That might not be for ages, but your psychologist may think you're ready for it because you haven't been fully transparent with her about how you're feeling. I know this might be tough to hear, but your psychologist won't know how you're feeling unless you're completely honest with her. That's not easy, and requires a lot of trust (which it seems like maybe you're not quite there yet and that's completely fine). It also takes time, I sometimes am not fully honest with my psych because I worry that telling her things may burden her. But you're actually paying for her to listen to you say whatever you need to say, and work through whatever you need to work through. As weird as it sounds, her feelings kind of don't matter. She will work through what she needs to work through in her own time, but she's there for you to tell everything you can't tell other people in your life. If you really feel like she's not the right fit for you, maybe you could ask for a referral to someone else who is better suited.    2) Cutting back sessions. Psychologists usually do this because they think you're getting better and therefore they aren't charging you for weekly sessions you don't need anymore. If you're struggling with stuff but not telling her, she may just think you're making a lot more improvement than you are. I know it seems like she's pulling away, and maybe she is (I don't know her as I said), but I would hazard a guess that she thinks you're doing a lot better and therefore she doesn't want to charge you for sessions you don't need (that would be considered unethical by the standards of practice as a psychologist). I went from weekly sessions to fortnightly sessions, to monthly sessions to now just calling and booking when I need a check in. I remember feeling kind of offended when my psych first suggested meeting less often. It's like you pour your heart out to someone and then it clicks that they're actually a professional who's helping you, because sometimes it can feel like talking to a friend. If you want to see her more frequently then you may need to let her know that you need more support than you're getting. I'm sorry because I know that's really hard, but I think this would be better than just stopping seeing her, but it's ultimately your life and your decision and I know you'll make the right one for you.    3) Please work with your doctor to come off your meds, if you decide to. It's really dangerous to try and come off them by yourself. Also, in my experience the times where I wanted to come off medication were usually the times where I actually needed it the most. I've seen many friends do the same thing and suffer for it. I took myself suddenly off anti-depressants and it was an awful, awful experience. Please consult with a doctor if you want to do it.   4) That's awesome that you're hoping to get some more family support, you deserve nothing but support and love. I'm sorry if this message seemed a bit tough love, I think you're such a great member of the RO community and I care a lot about you. I have so much empathy for your situation. I've been there, I've hit my rock bottom and it really sucked. I hope that you're able to do what's right for you, but also act cautiously. Sometimes we think we can do things alone, but in my experience, everything just gets harder. Humans need other humans, it's how we're hardwired. You deserve so much support and I hope that you get it.  ... View more

Ok so I'm a bit of a TV fiend. I love me a bit of telly. My favourite new show is called The Circle. It's a competitive reality show where people are in apartments by themselves but in the same building as their competitors and can only talk to each other via a voice-activated social media platform called The Circle. The aim is to become the most popular player but it's got a lot of twists and turns. One of the funniest things about it is that people can 'catfish' as other people they think would be more popular in The Circle. It's a really fun, funny show. I love competitive reality shows like Survivor as well because I'm fascinated by people and their behaviour. Honestly the way The Circle is filmed and edited is really fun too. I've watched the US version which is out on Netflix and the second season of the UK version (which is a lot better and is the original). I can also highly recommend Australian Survivor which starts back in February. As for non-reality shows, I've been enjoying the new season of Brooklyn Nine Nine! ... View more