Oh @Eden1717 ,   That's a horrible thing to experience  .  Why are you in trouble and not allowed to tell the crisis team anything anymore?    ... View more

Hey @SomeoneNADJS ,   Hey R, I'm sorry to read this.  That doesn't sound that helpful advice.  I want to check-in on your safety R.  Can you confirm that you're safe?   It's a lot of pressure for you to control the body with so much going on.  Is there any way you can let another member do some of the work such as Ma? One of the members who works hard and looks out for your well-being?   Thoughts are with you  ... View more

Hey @Tiny_leaf ,   I'm sorry to read that you didn't sleep well.  Did you have a lot on your mind?  Anything you want to talk about?   .   Lol, totally!  I need to watch it again. I can't believe they made six of those movies. ... View more

Hey @scared01,   That's tough  .  I can relate a wee bit.  I moved to Australia from Ireland 10 years ago.  I knew no-one here.  I joined meetup style groups such as 'board game' 'cinema going' groups etc.  The first 4-5 times I went I met no-one I connected with.   It wasn't easy to keep going back as I had insecurities (e.g., 'maybe I'm boring!') but I thought 'sod it, what do I have to lose? I may as well practice being social'.  I think just being part of the group and not putting pressure on myself to make friends or be interesting, gradually made me more comfortable being in those situations.   When I became more comfortable, I was able to converse better as I wasn't so nervous.  On the 6th occasion I did meet someone, who I am still friends with today.  Thus, it might be worth considering to keep going to those groups?  Another potential option is volunteering.  Have you tried that before?  I think it's a good way to practice as people come to you for help.  Apologies if you've tried these multiple times before.   Perhaps most importantly is to be comfortable by yourself first.   You mentioned arts/crafts and baking.  Those are cool interests    I'd love to learn how to knit and bake.  I reckon it's quite therapeutic?  Do you have any simple baking recipes for cookies or muffins you want to share?  .  By focusing on doing the things we like, we become better versions of ourselves and hopefully well-being improves.  When that happens, we become more relaxed and can engage better with others.      I'm not sure if any of this helps, I'm just sharing what helped me.  What I know for certain is that you are a valued member in this community and we are here for you.  I know it's not the same, but I hope it's something    ... View more

Hey @Itsonlyme ,   That's great news  . I love that you woke up feeling emotional and implemented a strategy (i.e., driving) to help pull yourself together.  What are you up to today?   ... View more

Hey @SomeoneNADJS ,   I'm glad you got some rest but sorry to hear you're still not going well  .  I caught up on your thread.  There's so much happening for you right now, it's no wonder you're finding it hard to calm down. You mentioned homework before?  Is that still on your mind?  If so, by completing it do you think you would feel any calmer?   ... View more

haha! ... View more

Hey @xXLexi_Lou122Xx    Good morning , how are you feeling today?  Just wanted to check-in on your pain (hope it's a bit better) and how you are travelling with the assignment etc.     Sending you good vibes  ... View more

Hey @Itsonlyme ,   Just wanted to check-in and see if you managed to push through last night?  That's a really good effort to make it past midnight.  The first day can be so difficult.   ... View more

Hey @scared01    That really sucks  .  I know it may not help but a lot of people struggle with friendships, both initiating and maintaining.  We can end up thinking we are boring and uninteresting etc.  However, sometimes it's just about finding people you connect with.  It can definitely take a while for this to happen.   Have you tried making friendships online via groups etc? Certainly, during my brief interactions with you I've found you thoughtful, caring, reflective, interesting, and genuine.  These are really nice traits to have.   I didn't know you ride horses  I love horse riding as it is so much fun and they are such beautiful creatures. What else are you into? ... View more

Hey @Tiny_leaf    You made me laugh with Sharknado, I forgot how bad that movie was  .  Bad horrors can be really funny I find because the acting is just so so terrible.     How are you feeling today?  Is your head any better?   ... View more

Hey @Charlie-29-1999 ,   Nice to make your acquaintance.  Perfectionism has a lot of positives.  It drives you to put in the work and perform well, as evidenced by your top grades at university.  As such, it can be a real strength.  However, the flip side is that it can bound you to standards that you either struggle to meet, or cannot meet every time.  That's where you have to find the balance, as difficult as it sounds.   CBT, ACT, DBT are all good treatment modalities.  However, have you done Schema work?  You've mentioned that you've had perfectionism traits since childhood.  As such, it's a strong part of you.  Schema Therapy looks into some of our traits developed during early childhood.  It may not work but it might be worth investigating .  Another thing to consider is that because it is such as strong part of you, it can take time to shift.  You may never completely get rid of perfectionism, but hopefully you can modify it a bit so you're getting the good parts (e.g., hard work and drive) and less of the bad parts (e.g., unrelenting standards). Hope this helps    Finally, often the most important part of therapy is the relationship you build with the therapist.  So take your time and find someone you feel you can really connect with.  After that, afford your self some patience (as counterintuitive as that may sound)      ... View more

Hey @Eden1717    Just checking in to see if the meds helped you get some rest last night  .   ... View more

Hey @SomeoneNADJS    Just checking in to see the system and your brain got some rest last night?  With so much activity going on, it's important to try and rest when you can (I know that can be difficult sometimes).  Let us know how you're going.   ... View more

Aw @Bananatime04 ,   I can't imagine what it must be like to live there without Eddie  . I am super impressed by your persuading skills though.  Keep us posted!  ... View more

Hey @scared01    Ah jeez, that's really bad form for your GP not to inform you  .  Hopefully you can find someone else you can connect with, and feel like you can open up to.  Have you ever had a psychologist or mental health worker you found helpful?  Have you other online or phone counselling before?   Certainly when I feel bad physically my mood suffers.  I may not even be aware of it until someone points it out.  It's funny how we can miss the most obvious things sometimes.  If we are feeling a bit sick/injured/off, no wonder we're a bit down/irritable?!  I hope you feel better physically soon.   You are more than welcome to talk about your emotions or feelings on here.  We are really glad to have you back and want to support you if/when you need      ... View more

Hey @Bananatime04 ,   That documentary sounds so heartbreaking but like you said, it delivers an important message.  I will have to watch it    OMG it's mother's day?! I best now out and get something this evening.  Thank you for reminding me!       ... View more

Hey @Eden1717    They still haven't called?!  Jeepers, that's not good at all.  I'm not surprised you're feeling jumpy given you have no clarity about when they're coming.  I know you mentioned not wanting to call because of the rude lady.  I'm wondering whether calling just to get a timeframe (e.g., 1-2 hours) of their arrival might help you feel a little less jumpy despite the difficulty in calling?  I know it's a tough one  ... View more

Hey @scared01 ,   I know you said you feel you don't deserve it.  We at the team and community really feel that you do.  We've seen how you've been there for others in times of need so now we are here for you.   ... View more

Hey @SomeoneNADJS    Hey R.  I've just caught up too.  Sounds like it was a productive session with KHL.  Did you send through the email?  How have you been going recently?  ... View more

Hey @scared01,   I'm so sorry to read this  .  The times are challenging enough at the moment with feelings of isolation etc., so I'd imagine that your GP unexpectedly taking leave would certainly and understandably incur some feelings of abandonment.  How have you found the male GP (I know it's for diffferent issues)?  You mentioned physical health, is it possible that there's some physical things that may be contributing to your low feeling?   I know you feel like shutting down rather than asking for help, so I'm really glad that you managed to convey your feelings here  .  You definitely deserve help and we are all here for you. Would you like to talk about the emotions you're feeling?     ... View more

Hey @Bananatime04 ,   I know you're a gymnast  .  Hmm, it's a fine balance between enjoying something for fun and then transferring any negative parts of yourself to it (e.g., comparing yourself to others).  I did a lot of martial arts in my teens and played heaps of competitive soccer (I still play soccer).  It was often during tough times (e.g., being injured) that I reminded myself to really just appreciate being able to play.  Certainly the Covid-19 has elicited this feeling.  Can't wait to play again!  Are you looking forward to going back to gymnastics?   I'm slightly older than my mid-20s haha, but not too much  . It's really trial and error and having the patience to discover yourself.  As cheesy as it sounds, I learned via failure and mistakes.  Through learning in lessons in mistakes (e.g., 'what I did I do wrong to result in that outcome?') and emotionally maturing I learned what I really value and enjoy.  When I focus on living by those values I'm much happier and like myself more.  However, it's a step-by-step process that's not linear.  There'll be ups and downs.  It's part of the process      I am the same person in some ways (I'm still too competitive when I play soccer and I'm childish sometimes) but I definitely think I've gradually become a better person over time .  Hopefully when I'm older I'll be a better person then than I am now  ... View more

Hey @Bananatime04    No wonder you're feeling so blue today    3 years of hating yourself in a long time.  I know it's not the same as everyone's experience of self-loathing is different but I certainly had self-loathing feelings during my teens for a multitude of reasons including feeling pressured to fit in with peers even though I knew I didn't, thinking I was ugly, boring, and dumb, and not really knowing who I was.   Being a teenager and young adult can be a really, really difficult time.  It's a period of trying to figure out who we are and how we exist in this world, and we're preparing for adulthood when we may not feel even close to ready. That's before you even consider the other difficulties life can throw at you.  It took my until my mid-20s to really figure out who I was.   Undoubtedly, we all have good and bad parts of ourselves.  However, when we are feeling low we cannot see any good.  I say this because you mentioned that even when you achieve something you pick out any piece of negativity.  This is because when you feel low you can begin viewing everything about yourself via a negative lens.  This lens is not objective as you've said you filter out any positives from achievement    You've hit on an important observation.  Your days are better when you focus on helping others, but it's only distracting you from the self-loathing and thus a temporary fix.  I understand that.  However, might this caring side of you be a part of you that you don't hate? Personally, I definitely like myself more when I'm kind to others.  I don't see it as a distraction but rather as a practice.  As a metaphor, it's like filling cups.  When I practice kindness, compassion, hard work, self-care etc, I fill the positive cups.  When I'm a little more self-destructive such as being selfish, not sleeping properly, not eating right etc., I fill the negative cups.  Filling the positive at least helps me like myself more.  It's not a permanent thing.  There are days when we do something wrong and think negatively of ourselves.  This is all part of the process.  We are humans, we make errors, and we try to learn from them.  Sometimes it takes us a long time to learn them, and sometimes it can take a long time to like ourselves.   You've said that you want to change but don't know how.  That shows there's a part of you that does want to get better.  Given this, I wanted to ask have their been periods when you didn't hate yourself over these three years and if so what was different?  What were you doing?   This might be a difficult task given how you're feeling so it might take some time to think about this.     I'm no expert on eating restrictions but I know the Butterfly Foundation specialise in this area.  Have you tried them and if so has it helped?  Apologises if you have and it hasn't.     Thoughts are with you  ... View more

Hey @bretaincrab3,   Hmmm, I'm not sure how to help as I use a PS4 to game.  I can imagine aiming with a mouse to be much quicker though.  Hopefully a member of the community can help you so you can sort out your aim   ... View more

Hey @Bananatime04 ,   Of course you can  .  You seem a bit down today.  What's been going on for you if you don't mind me asking? ... View more

Hey @Tiny_leaf    Glad you hear you're feeling a bit better .  What do you have on today?   ... View more

Hey @Bananatime04 ,   How are you doing this morning?    I will gently disagree with you if you don't mind.  You offered @xXLexi_Lou122Xx some potential strategies for the knee pain.  Even if they don't alleviate the pain, you still offered them because you shared some things that helped you (I hope your knee is better btw).  This is a caring gesture and you know, it even made me think about my hip pain I get when I play too much soccer.  Resting it has helped.  I'll try the deep heat too  .  These gestures are what I mean when I say you have so much to offer  ... View more

Hey @Itsonlyme    Sorry to read about what you're going through.  Recovering from addiction can be difficult and lengthy.  There may be bumps along the way and it's normal to have lapses.  It's important to know that a lapse is not a relapse, it's just a little bump, so if you notice even small improvements (i.e., less weed) then that is still progress .   Have you looked at any alcohol and drug services in your area?   ... View more

Hey @Eden1717 ,   Just checking in to see how you're going this morning.  I'm a bit concerned regarding what the voices are asking from you.  Have you asked you to suicide or hurt yourself in any way? ... View more