I hope everyone's challenges are going well! I love this, I feel like it really gives an overall goal/focus for each day.   I'm hoping my next 3 days will look like this: Day 1: take notice – be more present in the conversations I'm having and the tasks I'm completing Day 2: connect – I will reach out to some friends and my grandparents who I haven't seen in a while and check in on them to see if they need anything Day 3: give – I will ask my family members if there's anything I can do to help them e.g. any chores or things to do to prepare for the week ... View more

@priyaaaa maybe you could try to find the audiobook or find it online and get your laptop to play it out loud through speech to hear it? I'm also really trying to get into reading again, but I haven't found the right book yet. It's okay that it takes years to be fluent, small steps still help, like when I'm learning Italian I listen to Italian songs and watch Italian movies or English ones and put subtitles on. You could even get your friend to teach you some to start you off? But yeah especially going into Year 12, I can understand why you might leave language classes for now. From my experience, no one put me on the spot and asked me about myself like that, there were more little questions here and there that they used to get to know me, so I think your friends would do that too. I'm sorry that you feel like you don't know who you are, but it's okay, I feel like this too. I went on a date last week and my date literally asked me that exact question and I was like lol what do I like, what type of person am I, I have no idea. I like to ask my friends and family or do personality quizzes to help me understand myself or when little thoughts come into my head like 'ooh I really enjoyed doing ...' or 'I didn't do that so well but did that better' I write it down so I don't have to think of it on the spot. I'm not sure if that will help you, but I think it's okay that you don't know 100% who you are. From our conversations, you seem very considerate, and thoughtful and openminded. You ask me questions back and read carefully what I've written and ask me about it which shows you're caring and an active listener. I love that you said you deserve strong connections with mutual interest and passion. You go girl, manifest those positive vibes and those friendships because you do deserve that and I'm so happy you recognise that! And it is totally understandable that you don't want to feel sad and want a good group of friends around, I feel the same. That sounds like a lovely New Years. Mine was good, my friends' sister had a small party maybe 25 people so we were hanging out with them, it was fun. ... View more

@priyaaaa I'm sorry I took so long to respond. I hope your week has gone well! Ooooh I had to read the crucible for my year 12 English, but I've never heard of the other ones, are they good? I've always wanted to learn spanish, are you doing it through a course or on your own? They also sound like really good social media boundaries, I'm glad they're working for you! Of course, we can talk about anything that's on your mind. When I approached the group I definitely had a period of loneliness and apprehension, I think I felt a bit lonely because I was losing my old friends who I had been in a group with for so many years, but my new friends were very welcoming so I think it helped the loneliness pass relatively quickly, but as for the apprehension I think that lasted a bit longer because I was thinking about the fact I had just approached them and whether they would like me and what if it didn't work out, lots of worst case scenarios, especially because they were already close. I remember the first few weeks I would write down what I could talk to them about that day but in the end I never needed to worry sometimes the conversation would be a little awkward but I feel like that often happens with new friends, we started doing more together, we found things we had in common and the great thing about school is you can always talk about school. Also the thing about being in a group is you can sit and listen and observe and get to know them as well as them getting to know you. I think there was a bit of time where I didn't feel like I fit 100% in straight away because the group already existed, but that feeling eased after a while too. But I think it's important to remember different people open up to new people at different rates, so it's okay if it feels awkward at first, some friendships happen fast and others happen a bit more gradually. I'm so happy you had such a wonderful Christmas!! How was your New Years? ... View more

I hope everyone has a wonderful new year! Thank you for tonight, it was honestly a great chat! ... View more

@WheresMySquishy honestly preach this whole post, that is so inspirational to me, especially the oath to yourself and being true to who you are <3 ... View more

And for our final question this evening (and for the year eeeee)   How will you look after yourself and people you care about in the coming year? (This could be what you will do, who you surround yourself with, how you manage challenges, etc).    ... View more

@WheresMySquishy oooh they all sound like such fun things, I want to do a few of those myself! I have a massive booklist as well, going to try to get through as many as I can next year. @lost_Space_Explorer5 good luck with your psych, I know it can be scary but you can do it, I believe in you! ... View more

Next year I really want to change a few things, but most of all I especially want to focus on myself and the things that bring me joy, I feel like I didn't do that at all this year and it became quite stressful to keep up - I want to read more like I used to  - I want to put more energy into things that give me confidence and make me feel good and reduce/stop doing the things that don't - I want to exercise at least 3 times a week - I want to live a bit more of a minimalist life style - I want to educate myself more about the world, especially about privacy and being secure online - I want to try to go to bed early and wake up early ... View more

@WheresMySquishy they sound like some great goals for the new year! What are some of the things on your list that you would like to try/are there any specific things would you like to see? ... View more

@WheresMySquishy I'm sorry to hear about your worries for you and your family's health, I know how tough that can be, sending love <3 On the other hand, good luck for those postgraduate positions, fingers crossed for you! That sounds like a great mindset and great capabilities to have, you should be very proud of yourself for being so flexible and accepting, having a growth/open mindset. ... View more

@lost_Space_Explorer5 I have a lot of the same fears as you, during the year, if you figure out anything that works, let me know! I think next year I'm going to return to doing things that I did in my first years of high school, I just remember being really happy in those times so I'm going to try to return to some of those habits like reading more, less time on my phone and see how I go, but I definitely want to try to be more present. I'm sorry I don't have any tips for how you could see it differently. ... View more

For our next question...   What are some things in 2021 you’re looking forward to or wanting to achieve? Is there something you’re not looking forward to or worried about? How might you apply any lessons you learnt in 2020 to approach these hopes and fears?   ... View more

No it's never too late to join @musicfan_xo, welcome!! ... View more

What are some good things that happened for you in 2020, or what’s something you are proud of achieving? What were some challenges for you or people you care about? 2 things I'm proud of this year are, I got my first job which was pretty exciting and I did well at uni. At the beginning of the year I was really nervous for how to study and if I could manage the workload because I struggled in the first few weeks to keep on top of everything, but I think having time to focus was 1 positive of isolation! As for challenges, I know almost everyone would feel this way, but not being able to see the people I care about all the time, especially my grandparents, was difficult, but really made me appreciate the times I could see them. ... View more

@Lost_Space_Explorer5 I know sometimes it can be really hard to commit to resolutions, I like to physically write mine down and look at them often or keep them in a place I can see them and I find that usually helps me stay on track.   @WheresMySquishy they sound like fun New Years plans, I hope your fireworks don't get cancelled!!   @featuringme I really like that mindset you have, I feel like we all need a bit of optimism and positivity right now, I know I do hahaha ... View more

To me, the new year is a bit like a fresh start, I try to use it to refresh mentally. I like to write a list of things that I would like to do during the year and specific goals I have. Next year, I really want to focus on participating in things that genuinely contribute to my life and positive mental health and saying no if I feel like it will do the opposite, just really getting that balance of uni, work, friends/family and my own time and trying to reduce my stress. ... View more

Thanks @Lost_Space_Explorer5 so keen for this GR to start!!  ... View more

@priyaaaa I'm glad you've been feeling better since we last spoke. I also love reading and languages. What are you currently reading and what language are you learning?   I'm sorry to hear about your previous friend situations, I also hope one day that cycle breaks, hopefully with your future year 12/uni friends you will be able to see them more outside of school!   I definitely think I'm going to set some social media boundaries, I already have put in a few, like turning my active status/notifications/location off, unfollowing people that don't have the kind of energies/content I want to see but I kind of just want to cold turkey log off on all my accounts and not use them at all, I did that a few months ago, it was so refreshing.   I'm glad to hear journalling and talking to others has helped you in the past. Would you ever do journalling daily? Have you tried any other strategies that have been helpful?   That sounds lovely, I hope you had a great Christmas! Yes I do celebrate, my Christmas was also small just my immediate family and my grandparents and I think we ate for 6 hours but the food was delicious.  ... View more

hi @Sunnybear I just wanted to check in and see how you're going? I also just wanted to let you know that you are not alone, so many people I have spoken to this year have said something similar or the same to what you have and I have also felt the same at stages during the year. I think the most important take away I've gotten from this year is when the opportunity to do something you've always wanted to do/try (even just a little) arises, you should take it, because you don't know when the opportunity will arise again, or even making opportunities for yourself to do things you've wanted to do, even if it means doing them by yourself. But I totally understand the anxiety about the future, have you found anything that has helped you with this? ... View more

@priyaaaa I think that's a really good mindset to have about the situation, good on you for trying to be positive. I'm sorry you're still feeling down though. What are your interests and hobbies? Is there someone you do these with who could help motivate you or do them alongside you? I know after a busy/weird year, sometimes I just need some time to rest, I love watching trashy movies/reading trashy books in my bed all day (especially Christmas ones), or just doing something mindless. You mentioned you just wanted to rest for the summer, and that is totally okay, try not to feel the pressure to have this jam-packed summer, especially going into year 12, you will need your energy so it is totally okay to veg out and take a time out from socialising if that is what your gut is telling you.    As for your three friends, I totally get the situation with your third friend, I think it's happening to me right now too, I find losing friendships sad but there's that saying, we have three types of friends in life, friends for a reason, friends for a season and friends for a lifetime. Maybe you haven't met your lifetime friends yet, maybe they aren't your people for life but were your people for a bit during school. I know so many people say they meet their lifetime friends at uni or work.    I think it's important to take time out from social media, lately it's been making me feel so stressed I never used to understand that before why people got so anxious because I always thought of it as connecting, but now I see the pressure, so I think that's great that you understood your boundaries, knew it was getting too much and took a time out for your mental health! Have you ever thought about journalling or speaking to someone to help you understand your emotions or what's going through your head? I find that it helps me.    Thank you my summer is going okay, to be honest it has been a bit stressful with work etc. I feel like I haven't even had a break yet but at the same time that I'm also running out of time to do stuff I really want to do. But hopefully in the next couple weeks things will slow down and I can also veg out.    Do you have any plans for Christmas? I hope you had a great day  ... View more

@MB95 omg I love this thread idea!   I just made this recipe (linked below) and I'm literally the worst cook but my friends and family really liked them so I'm thinking it's one to keep. I would definitely try them out!! https://www.taste.com.au/recipes/gingerbread-men/3a04ab1d-a84a-424f-800a-7ebcbe92fa09   On Christmas Day I really want to try these:   And this was my inspiration for Christmas this year!   Wishing everyone a very Merry Christmas, I hope you all have a beautiful day with your family and friends  ... View more

@A_Friendsorry it took so long for me to respond. I don't think it's social media that's making me feel pressured, or my friends/family/myself either, I haven't really explored it very much to be honest, New Years has just never been my favourite holiday celebration, I like thinking and planning for the new year but in terms of execution of the actual night, yeah just not my fave. Trying to change my mindset about it though, because I don't like to have set negative mindsets about anything. Thank you for your advice!   I'm glad you're feeling a little more in the Christmas spirit, I saw you also put up some little decorations in your bedroom, that's very cute. Have you done any other shopping/baking/celebrating since we last spoke? ... View more

hi @Kinkin I just wanted to check in and see how you're going a few weeks later. I'm so sorry to hear it's been tough for you lately, but even though you went through something traumatic, the fact you are still offering love, support and an open ear to others is really a testament to your character! Car accidents can be really scary though, I had one at the beginning of the year and even though it was only small I thought about it a lot afterwards. You mentioned overthinking and crying when you're driving, does driving make you anxious? Is there anyone you have spoken to/could speak to about this? I know I find driving really stressful and have to work myself up to do it, you are not alone in your feelings. I hope you're going well!  ... View more

hi @priyaaaa how are you going? I'm sorry it's been a little while! I'm glad my own experiences showed you you aren't alone. I know that can be super scary when you don't really know them and have to approach them, it truly does take a big leap of faith, but like I said before you can do this! I feel like everyone always wonders how they are going to make friends or imagines how they are going to approach them and what they are going to say and kind of do a little role play in their head (I know I definitely do this too) but trust me making friends will come to you like riding a bike, and especially if you have classes together you'll automatically have that in common and can talk about the teacher, the homework, assignments etc. and things will grow from there. But no I completely understand how stressful it is, I'm sorry to hear you have been feeling down over the summer, is there anything that you really love doing that can cheer you up? Also I know you mentioned that being alone/self-sufficient isn't really for you, but something I've recently learnt/am still learning is just because you are spending time by yourself doesn't mean you're alone. Having alone time can really help some people to rejuvenate, like just yesterday I went to the city by myself, did a little shopping, went into the state library and had a look at the exhibitions and it was actually really nice to spend time with myself. Now that's totally okay if that's not for you, but one way of looking at this is kind of like a blessing in disguise, a bit of me-time to mentally rejuvenate before a busy final year of high school! I hope you're going okay  ... View more

@WheresMySquishy wow you sound like you have some amazing experiences and memories from your cruises!   @Kaylee-RO I'm a bit worried about COVID at the moment especially in Sydney and NSW, I would definitely love to but will just have to see how everything goes over the next few months. Thank you for these recommendations though, I will definitely write them all down and keep them in mind for when I (hopefully) do go! ... View more

@priyaaaa I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this, feeling alone and a bit scared. But I'm here to tell you I have been there before. A few years ago, one day my friend said she didn't want to be in the group anymore and she brought all our other friends with her into this bigger group and whilst I still had my best friend in the end she moved into the bigger group too. One day at lunch I literally had to go up to this girl who I sat next to in 1 class but she was really nice and say I'm sorry I don't really have any friends right now, do you mind if I sit with you and your friends and 4 years later they are still my group now! I think it was honestly one of the scariest things I've ever done because I was worried she would say no or that I'd go through the rest of high school with no friends, but once I did it was so proud of myself. I also found when I was in Year 12 friendship groups changed a bit anyway as people became friends with those in their sports/classes, plus I'm sure people would be open and welcoming to a new member in their group! For me it was important to have a support system of friends in Year 12 because it can get a bit stressful, so if it were me I would take the leap and approach this group of girls you've thought might make a nice group of friends for you. I know it's scary, but if you feel as though that's what you would like to do, I believe in you, you can do it!  ... View more

@A_Friend I'm sorry to hear you're struggling right now to get into it, but a little bit at a time all adds up! For me, I love Christmas but New Years not so much. I love celebrating/thinking about the meaning and history of Christmas, the way different cultures celebrate Christmas and the way people become more conscious about spreading love and kindness during Christmas. I love the beautiful music and decorations and I say this but know at some stages during the Christmas season I'm a hypocrite, but I try to remind myself to be a conscious shopper and not get too caught up in the commercialisation of it all. I feel like there's so much pressure on 'new year new me' to have the best New Years on social media and do everything right in the new year. But it makes me sad that many families will not be able to be together this year but I think it reminds us not to friends, family and celebration for granted when we have it. ... View more

@Anonymous That's great that you feel you can tell one of your friends, it's important to have support from those you trust/are close to. I'm not sure if you've come out to your friend already, if you have, how did it go? If you haven't good luck! I think what @James99 said could be helpful telling them you have something important on your mind that you've wanted to share for a while so they know to take it seriously or maybe finding conversations that sort of lead to the topic e.g. maybe relationships or dating or putting yourself out there to date I'm not sure if you and your friend talk about these things. Let us know how everything goes  ... View more

@WheresMySquishy Such an awesome thread, there are so many beautiful places in the world I wish we could see them all. I'm so jealous you've been to Egypt that's literally my #1 place to visit, I hope I make it there one day. I would also love to go on a tropical holiday to somewhere like the Maldives or a ski trip in Japan, I honestly am not fussy any travel is amazing to me. Oh there are also the places I went when I was a lot younger with my family, I wish I had more memories, from trips like New Zealand when I was 4 years old, so I hope to visit those places again one day too!   @WheresMySquishy @Kaylee-RO @sunnygirl606 those places sound amazing, I just added them to my to visit list hehe      @WheresMySquishy where did you go on a cruise? @sunnygirl606 I've also been to London I loved it one of my favourite places ever, what did you do when you were over there? @Kaylee-RO my friends are looking into going to Byron Bay, any recommendations?  ... View more

@discontinued_kate I don't know if you intended this but this is so poetic, you are a beautiful writer and it really spoke to me. Forgetting to remember, replying to friends seeming monolithic, friendships in 3s, I feel like these are things (among others that you wrote) that many people can relate to. Are you sad right now? Are you okay? ... View more