The new year hasn't started well with me, my mother's having a go at me for apparently not trying hard to live independently, get a job and find friends which hurts because i have been trying my hardest and i'm just unlucky right now. Since i don't have any friends, professionals and other family to talk to about how empty and worthless i feel i don't know what to do 😢😢, i honestly feel like running away living on the streets or just die. It's hell and i don't know how to get out of it ... View more

I know it's early but want to wish everyone on here a merry christmas and a happy new year, i want to say thank you all for being welcoming and caring since i signed up it's been so wonderful having people on here that listens and understands me for a change. Some of your suppport has left me overwhelmed and sometimes made me cry because it helped me out 😢, because joining up to these forums was the best highlight for me this year i'm sending over lots of virtual hugs and presents to you all 🤗🎁❤. What's been your highlight of 2020? ... View more

Only just found out about this wonderful thing today i was originally a boy, from an young age i was very unhappy about my identity and lived with it til earlier this year when i woke up one morning and said to myself "i don't want to be a male any longer" "i don't want to be unhappy anymore". I started my journey as a non-binary with buying genderless clothes, makeup, got my ears pierced (getting my septum pierced soon) and now currently in the process of getting my name changed legally, i've never been happier and am very proud of who i am. This awareness week means a lot to me as i'm part of a wonderful community that doesn't judge and loves me for who i am which makes me so happy, i would love to hear from other  non-binary, transgender etc users on here how you started your journey and what this awareness week means to you. Love you all ❤️ ... View more

I've been recently out of a mental institution due to another suicide attempt, i'm all good now currently on meds but since i got out i lost the last of my friends as my attempt pissed them off that much that they don't want anything to do with me anymore which hurt even today. The only people i have closest to mates are from my cricket  team who are very social and are drinkers, everytime i'm with them i use a different personality and drink with em sometimes heavily just so i can fit in with em. At the end of the day i'm not happy with being someone completely different instead of being myself which my teammates will find any opportunity to target me, i don't have anyone in my life to talk to about my problems or similar which makes me really upset 😢 i wish that someone could just give me a big hug and tell me positive things such as "you're an amazing human being" etc ... View more

Today's my birthday but i'm very lonely since i've got no people in my life to celebrate the occassion with me or even wish me one, what could i do to make my occasion happy and a worthwhile one? ... View more

Hi again just giving an update on my last post, i was doing really good for a period of time but things have rapidly slipped downwards. Since my relationships with friends and family have pretty much disintegrated lately i've been going out trying to find new people but it's been no success mainly due to no one really understanding why i'm agender and that i'm a lot happier than say compared to my original identity as a boy, the attempts beat me up badly mentally and became really depressed. The last time i talked to my psychiatrist (a while back) regarding my depression he recommended me to start with anti-depressants if they worked he would let me continue with em depending on my mood, if they didn't work the only other solution was to go to a local mental health inpatient unit for a couple to few weeks. I honestly don't want to go on anti-depressants or anything similar at all whether it's good or bad due to my past overdosing problem which left me with a traumatic effect where everytime i see pills/drugs from chemists i get a sick sometimes nauseating feeling, and i too don't want to stay in a mental health unit either. Ever since i told my old psychiatrist i was suicidal i've been getting calls from mental health hotlines pretty much everyday which sometimes i pick up but most of the time i refuse to answer, i'm really scared that out of nowhere during my day i could have a mental health team that will come to my place and escort me possibly to that mental health unit cause i mostly don't pick up the helpline calls.    ... View more