1. I own 4 ducks :) 2. I know how to Latin dance 3. I've run a half marathon 4. I've read over 200 books 5. My next travel destination is: Melbourne! ... View more

forest morning or evening? ... View more

food ... View more

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Hey @ILikeCake, thanks for taking the time to write about your experiences. I totally understand how it feels to be concerned over the consequences of your past behaviour and to struggle with feelings of regret. It's not a great feeling and I think it's such an awesome step that you've chose to reach out and talk about how it's making you feel. That's a super brave step for you to take :-)   You mentioned that you started watching porn from about 12 and then stopped when you were 14 because you heard of porn addiction. Is that correct? Something that stuck out to me when reading your story was that you are concerned that you might have had a porn addiction, but aren't sure (though either way, it's stopping you from exploring your sexuality currently) - does that sound about right?   I did some research on porn addiction and here's what I could find in the way of definitions:   Pornography addiction  is an addiction model of  compulsive  sexual activity or use of  pornographic  material, despite negative consequences to one's physical, mental, social, or financial well-being.   ^ does this sound like something similar to what you experienced? I feel like one of the defining characteristics was that it had a negative impact on other areas of your life (such as mental, social, etc.). Was this something that you were noticing when you were watching it?   I think it's also important to bear in mind that arousal, watching porn and masturbation are also very normal experiences for teenagers to go through (and even 12 year olds!) Growing into sexual maturity often involves a lot of hormones that can really peak your interest in content like porn, and in most cases, this is totally normal and okay! You might find that it settles down in time, but some people also just have super high sex drives. I think exploring how you feel about sex is totally okay, but still today there's a lot of stigma around people (particularly women's) freedom to do so, which can lead to feelings of self-disgust and shame. Which I don't think is particularly fair, because it's also a normal experience for women to have as well as boys!   So while I think you should definitely have a look at whether or not you feel like you fit the description for 'porn addiction', it's worth bearing in mind that developing a sex drive is nothing to be ashamed of. There's nothing wrong with wanting to explore your sexuality, and getting aroused is a completely normal part of development.    Do you feel like you have people in your social circle who you can talk to about these things (such as sex?). They may also be able to answer some of the questions you might have around it.   Let me know if you think I'm on the right (or wrong) track with anything :)   ... View more

Hey there @skyfireinferno99, I imagine that it must be really hard to open yourself up to the idea of seeing another psychologist after your past experiences. I think that it's great that you have found such a compassionate doctor who really seems to be engaging in your mental health journey. My best advice would probably be to remind you that everyone is different (even psychologists!) and that keeping an open mind will give you the best opportunity to establish a strong connection with someone else. Do you feel like this is something that you feel prepared to do? It's always something that you could bring up with your new psyc as something that you feel like you are struggling with - maybe that can be something that you approach together and could help create a stronger level of trust :-) Let me know what you think! ... View more

Hey @annabethxchase, sorry to hear that you had such a bad experience with your psychologist. I think relationships with psychologists can be really emotional sometimes, because we do give them a lot of trust when we open up to them, and it's very easy to feel vulnerable in those situations. So when they go against the trust that we gave them, it can hurt a lot more than we'd expect it to. Do you think that because they don't see you too often, they were just really worried that you needed someone to be in on the loop who could watch you more closely? I'm not saying that lying to you was acceptable, but their primary concern will always be your safety, and I do think that unfortunately that means that sometimes, they have to prioritise your safety over your comfort. From what you said it definitely sounds like your psychologist could have done it in a more considerate and respectful way, but this concern may have also been a driving factor. Do you think that this is a possibility? ... View more

Today, I'm going to open up a bank account that is separate from my family accounts, so that I can start being more in control of my own finances. I'm also (((((super))))) close to having paid off my car. I'm proud of myself for starting to step into fully-fledged adulthood and beginning to direct my future :) ... View more

Hey @Eden1717, feel free to touch base with us about how your appointment went, we'd love to hear from you :) ... View more

Hey @BunnyWalks, that's a great idea! Do you know of any services that you think you want to use? I'm happy to give you some suggestions for helplines and online services if you want :) Hope you have a great day today :) ... View more

Ooh probably ages ago! Haven't met too many new people of late :) Last book you read ... View more

A book cover! silver ... View more

Hogwarts!! action movies or romance? ... View more

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apple, mandarin and passion-fruit juice :) ... View more

Hey @saltwaterdreamtime, that's totally unfair if they are going to report you to the police if you haven't done something, but it's unlikely that the police will be able to do anything if you've not done anything wrong. Why do they think that you have something to do with what happened? ... View more

1. I managed to take some time to read some of my book today 2. I've organised my uni schedule and my books, stationary etc and I'm getting excited to start uni!! 3. It looks like I have a good week at work lined up for me, so that'll be really neat. ... View more

What a good idea for a chat! I've still got a month before I'm back at uni but I reckon it still counts - it's just school for old people ;) ... View more

Hey @rainbowpotato, I'm so impressed at how you managed to turn around a grim situation and are still looking at the positive side. It's great that you have such a supportive circle of friends, and that you are seeing the positives that can come out of difficult situations. Good luck for starting grade 10 also! How are you feeling about that? ... View more

Hey @Eden1717, I'm sorry to hear that you're going through such a rough time with your meds at the moment. I know that starting/stopping/changing meds can also be a super stressful process, especially when you add in other factors like moving house. I'm sorry that it's such a hard time for you right now, sending all my positive vibes your way. What are your plans for tomorrow? ... View more

Hey @Saltwaterdreamtime, why do you think you're going to get in huge trouble? I don't think I fully understand what situation you're describing. How are you doing at the moment?  ... View more

Hey @BunnyWalks, I'm just checking to see how you're going at the moment :) I think with globalisation happening at the rate that it is now, it's normal to experience a bit of cultural confusion and, particularly with parent-generations, get into conflicts about different cultures (as this is not an issue that they have had to deal with as head-on). It's definitely okay to feel like your parents aren't treating your fairly, especially if they are trying to confine your behaviour and aren't letting you be the person that you want to be. That being said I'm not an expert on any cultures,so can't really recommend what discussion is the best to have with them about it. Do you feel like talking to them frankly about the issue may help to alleviate some of the tension? ... View more

Hey @XxnxX, just checking in and seeing how you're going! I hope you're doing well - sending lots of positive vibes your way :)  ... View more

Hey @scared01, studying with a mental illness is such an important topic and I'm so glad you brought it up!   In terms of workload, I definitely agree with all of the things that @Puppies026 mentioned. I do believe that even studying online, you should be able to give your uni/TAFE a call, or have a meeting and will be able to get extra support. I know that my uni will give extensions on assignments, waive public speaking assignments and let you sit less tutorials if you are going through a mental illness. I'm sure TAFE should have similar abilities too! Have you tried giving them a call to find out? As for the motivation factor, I suppose that's a bit difficult to predict until you're fully in your course. I know that studying with a mental illness can be so hard, especially if you're going through a bad patch and don't want to do much. Perhaps this can also be helped with the services that I mentioned before, as in, perhaps you can extend some assignments if this is something that you end up experiencing? ... View more

Hey @BunnyWalks! Thanks so much for taking the time to write about how you are feeling. From what I understand, your parents have a predominantly Asian background, and they aren't being supporting of you wanting to move toward a more 'Australian' way of life. Does that sound correct? I think an issue like this can be very complicated, as it's very normal to be proud of your culture and to want to pass on your cultural traditions to your children. It's likely that you parents were raised in such a way that they have these values that they think are really important, and they're worried that you don't seem to be prioritising the same things. And it's totally okay for you to have your own identity, and if you want to value other things in your life then that's fine! I think what could be happening is that your parents could just be worried that you will lose your connection to a culture that's very important to them, and that this could make them less close to you in general. Have you tried having a talk with them and seeing if you can let them know that you're not completely giving up your background, but you are just in a different place that has different customs? I'm not sure if that makes complete sense :-)   I think there are definitely some differences between Asian and Australian culture, like you said about Asian culture prioritising academics, whereas Australians are more focused on having a good time with mates. I know that you were looking for suggestions to 'make life more about you rather than the people around you', so I just want to remind you that you are totally free to choose your own identity. What cultural traditions you choose to take on are completely up to you. If you prefer living a life that is more traditionally 'Australian', then you're free to do that! But I would also remember that it's just possible that your parents are wanting to keep you close and pass on the way that they were raised, and that they could just be worried that you are aligning with a culture that they don't know a lot about. Do you feel like if you have a talk to them with that perspective in mind, that it may help with the issue a bit? You could tell them some more about Australian culture and perhaps let them see that it's not all that bad? Again, I could be totally off the mark with the type of parents you have (if so - let me know)! But that's what came to mind when reading your message :) Let me know how it goes! ... View more

Hey @unnamed_, thanks for sharing your story and I'm really sorry to hear about what's been going on in your house. That sounds really difficult to live with, and I think that problems under your own roof are that much harder because you can never catch a break from them.   You mentioned that your parents are really busy and that there's 4 of you as siblings. Is it possible that they don't understand the severity of the issue that you are describing? As in, they might know that Drake has an issue with you, but they might think that you both fight each other rather than it being one-sided, or they might not understand how bad it really is. Have you tried to have a discussion with them about how it makes you feel and how upset it makes you?   I'm sorry to hear that it's so rough for you to catch some peace and quiet in your own house. i think in larger families, it can often be the case that there's more of an 'every man for himself' mentality as it's harder to keep track of everyone's behaviour. And that definitely doesn't make it okay - your parents should still protect you, even if the issue is your own sibling. But I definitely think that issues within the family are harder to spot the bigger the family is. Do you feel like that may be part of the issue? That they're just not noticing the extent to which it's happening? In terms of something that can be done about the issue, do you have a friend who you could stay with from time to time when things get rough? Or is it worth talking to a relative about the issue so that you can crash at theirs if you can't stand being at home? Let me know how everything goes - we are all here for you :) ... View more

Hey @XxnxX,wow, that really does seem like a lot is going on for you and I'm sorry to hear that you're not getting the support that you need from your parents. Especially at a time where you have such a young child, I imagine that it must be really hard to feel like you also need to care for your sister and that you don't have any support from your parents either. I think it's amazing that you've come as far as you have, and I also think it's commendable that you've chosen to reach out and talk about your experiences.    On a positive note, I think these experiences have the opportunity to shape you into a really understanding and caring mother, as you understand what it's like to feel like you have been defending yourself from such a young age. What you have been through sounds really hard, and I don't want to downplay that, but I think there will eventually be a silver lining in the amount of wisdom that you can take from it and apply to your own parenting :)   How is your sister feeling about the whole situation now that she's living with you? I notice that you said that you are organising all the doctor's appointments for her - does she not also want to help herself? I also completely understand what you mean when you talk about some of the issues you've had with your mother. I've definitely had experiences where people close to me have a bad relationship with alcohol and it makes them lash out. And it can be really hard to always hold them accountable for it, because a bit in you wants to say that it's not them, it's just the alcohol. But I think at the end of the day, if the alcohol is something that they choose to go back to, and they don't see anything wrong with their behaviour, then that will be a part of them until they see the need for change. So I feel like they are still accountable for the actions that they do. But that's just my opinion and it's certainly not one that you have to agree with wholeheartedly. I can just say that I definitely understand where you are coming from .   Let me know how everything goes, we are all here for you and if you ever need a good vent, then feel free to pop on here and talk about it :)  -BasketOfMonkeys ... View more

I love the idea of having a 'word of the year' or an idea of the year @letitgo! That way it's not a specific goal, but it's a way of directing your overall behaviour, which can knock down many goals at once That's such a smart idea, I love it :) ... View more