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Guys help idk what to do
So I’m bi and a guy I like asked me out, but it was like in a joking sort of way so idk if he was serious. I kind of got flustered and just deflected it… I know that he’s bi as well but I’m way too awkward to ask him out. We’re currently friends and I don’t want to make things awkward if he doesn’t like me. Idk what to do. Like idk if he was joking, or flirting or something else.
Comments
OK OK I GOTCHU I GOTCHU. So... sounds like if he jokingly asked you out it could be serious it might not. Maybe try making a casual side remark over text and use the tone tag /hjk to kinda hint your a little serious? I know I'm friends with someone who confessed they had feelings for me but i just said hey its sweet you like me but i dont really feel the same and we were fine. Just saying that for if he doesnt feel the same but maybe just test it out by making a little casual side comment joke flirting to see if he reciprocates
Hey @Fern_Herring , thanks for being brave and reaching out!
It sounds like you're going through a bit of a tough situation, and you might be feeling confused and conflicted. Navigating feelings can be tricky for sure, especially when we don't know how the other person might be feeling.
Would you like to talk a bit more about the situation? If you don't mind me asking, what has given you the impression that he might be joking?
There's no right or wrong answer here, I know it's easier said than done but try not to put too much pressure on yourself to make the 'right choice', and give yourself the time you need to sit and think through your feelings! I'd love to hear more about the choices of action that you're debating between, if you'd like to share 🙂
Thanks for responding! I think he might have been joking because it wasn't like 'do you want to go out' or anything like that, we were talking and he said he had had 2 boyfriends and 2 girlfriends, and then was like (in a joking tone) 'it could be three' and did that thing (you know when someone says 'your shoes are untied' or 'look over there' and then they pull your face back and are like 'haha I rizzed you up'?) anyway, he did that, and then just kind of didn't address it for the rest of the hour or so we were hanging out.
People usually don't say things like that unless they're really comfortable with you or nervous to ask you out and try and judge your reaction by flirting. I'd say talk to him about it, it's always better to try than to miss out on having any chance by not doing anything, if he was joking it wouldn't get awkward for more than a few days max if he's a good friend. If he wasn't joking then it is up to you.
Ok, thank you. That helps. I went to send him a message asking if he was serious, but I lost my nerve every time before sending it lol.
I was about to send a text message yesterday evening but I kinda lost my nerve but also decided to do it idk. Then I went to ask him idk… and lost my nerve again lol. Might take a while before I actually build up the nerve XD
You've got this! Take as much time as you need, but remember this isn't just for you it might make him feel a lot better too so maybe see it as a favour.