Stress headaches, night terrors and domestic violence and feeling a bit overwhelmed
Hi so I've never done anything like this before but I just needed to get this off my chest for a long time now and I finally decided to do it.
I'm a uni student and my home life has never been great. One of my parents has severe mental health issues, suffering from depression, anxiety and serious bipolar and I've had to cope with this from a young age. Sometimes I wouldn't understand why they'd stay all day in bed, or why they'd suddenly cry without a rational reason to. It took me until I was older to understand these things and I'm still trying to let go of the anger I held for them because sometimes I felt like they weren't being the supportive parent I needed... but they just couldn't. This has led to many breakdowns, alcoholism, verbal and emotional abuse, and overall tension in our household. My sibling also has depression and anxiety and we moved a lot when we were younger to care for his wellbeing. My other parent and I try and hold the family together, to do chores and keep the household running but it is really hard. There has also been a lot of tension between my parent's marriage, especially now. To cope with all of this when I was younger, I developed anorexia at around 8 years old and was submitted to hospital when it became close to deadly. However, I kept it hidden from my parents, friends and even doctors and therapists because I was ashamed and didn't want them to worry about me because there was so many other things going on. Since then, after suffering anorexia for 10 years and going in and out of hospital in my teens, I have recovered. But it wasn't until I recovered that I opened up about my condition.
Right now, I am a uni student and I am currently feeling very overwhelmed trying to balance work, my uni work, COVID19, and living with my family in this situation. Lately the mental health of my family members and marriage of my parents has becoming increasingly tense and spread thin. I am unsure of how to cope and have been getting repeated stress headaches, migraines and bad night terrors where I can barely sleep at night. I would really appreciate any support, or someone who understands what I'm going through. I just need someone. Thank you so much for reading this far and listening to me. I appreciate it.
Comments
Hello @chinupbuttercup, thank you for sharing your story, and welcome to the forums. I am sorry to hear about what has been happening for you. It sounds like a very difficult situation to be in. I can only imagine how overwhelming and stressful it must be to be balancing uni work, home life and adjusting to the current COVID situation. I can't imagine what it must be like to care for your family whilst having so much going on. It sounds like you are a very caring person 
I am sorry to hear that you have been experiencing stress headaches and have been unable to sleep. Have you had a chance to speak to a health professional (such as a GP or a Psychologist/Psychiatrist) about how you have been feeling?
You may also find it helpful calling a helpline and speaking to a trained counsellor. Some of these helplines include (but are not limited to): Kids Helpline, Lifeline, eHeadspace and Beyond Blue. Have you contacted a helpline before?
I am glad to hear that you are safe tonight. Do you have anything planned for the rest of the night?
That sounds so difficult...
You mentioned domestic violence, are you safe right now?
Just gonna remind you that if anyone is in danger, you can call 000.
1800respect might also be able to help with that.
I can see why you're struggling so much, it sounds like you're in a really difficult situation..
While I haven't experienced anything similar, I'm around if you need to talk.
I am safe for now. But thank you for the numbers, I might need to use them in the future.
Thank you for reaching out. It really means a lot.
That's no problem @chinupbuttercup
Do you have a safety plan for if things escalate?
When my brother was abusing me it was very helpful to have a safe place to run.
