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TW: My dead Nanna

Hi everyone,

 

6 years ago, my Nanna passed away from lung cancer. Tonight, I really miss her, and I want to be with her again. Can you give some advice. 

Lavender_Shrew
Lavender_ShrewPosted 30-08-2024 01:31 AM

Comments

 
Green_Ghost
Green_GhostPosted 04-09-2024 05:53 PM

Hi there @Lavender_Shrew

 

I'm so sorry that you're feeling this way recently, I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing a loved one is never easy, is it? It can take a long time to come to terms with grief, and grief can often re-emerge after quite some time; especially when we are reminded of our loved ones.

 

I would really suggest talking to friends and family about your feelings and letting it all out. These trusted people can help you to navigate your feelings around it and how to approach this grief. You could also try journalling your feelings if you don't feel comfortable talking to others, just to get it off your chest. There's also nothing wrong with a good cry too, I find that it helps me and can be quite cathartic 💜 I like to remember all the good things about them, and appreciate them.

 

Alternatively, there is also Kids Helpline and Griefline (if you are over 18) for over the phone counselling support.

 

Please be kind to yourself during this time and take it easy 💜

 
LittlePisces
LittlePiscesPosted 03-09-2024 06:43 PM

Hi @Lavender_Shrew

 

Firstly, I am sorry for your loss. Losing someone you love is never easy. During this time it is important to confide in those closest to you and seek comfort in your family. It is ok to express and discuss your thoughts as you have shared with the community - if those closest to you have created a safe and open space for you to communicate these heavy feelings, I encourage you to do so. Speaking with your closest family or friends can help you navigate this difficult time and learn how to manage your grief. That being said, please be gentle with yourself as you embark on a journey of healing. Recovery is not linear, it can feel a lot like going ten steps forward and ten steps back. There is no set timeline in grieving 🤗

 

I see that your Nanna was a special person who you love dearly. It is helpful to remember your Nanna for who she was, what she meant to you and others around you. Remember the happy moments you shared with her and how she made you feel. Grief can be thought of as expressing the love you have for your Nanna 💜 

 

The community is here to support you. We are all thinking of you during this difficult time. Please don't hesitate to reach out again 🤗💜

 
dewgong
dewgongPosted 03-09-2024 12:30 PM

Hi @Lavender_Shrew

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your Nanna. My grandma passed away about 8 years ago now from cancer and I still have moments where the grief comes back. It will just take one thing - like a bracelet that looked like hers or seeing someone who looks like she did to set me off. @Scarlet_Locust is right that there is no timeline for grief. Sometimes it leaves for a long time and sometimes it's there every day. For me, it always helps to share my grief with someone else, even if they didn't know my grandma. Sometimes you just need to let it all out and cry and tell someone how unfair it all is. Is there someone you feel comfortable doing that with like a friend or family member or counsellor? If not, sometimes just talking to yourself can work too. Just know that you are allowed to feel this way and sit in your grief as long as you need. It's okay to miss her as much as you need to and think about your memories together ❤️

 
Scarlet_Locust
Scarlet_LocustPosted 02-09-2024 09:52 PM

Hi @Lavender_Shrew , i'm so sorry to hear about your loss.

 

I know that you posted this a couple days ago now, but i'm so sorry to hear that you're really missing your Nanna at the moment. Grief is so incredibly complex, and often causes so many different difficult emotions too. Grief is ongoing and has no timeline, and there's no correct way to grieve someone. I think this can become especially complicated too when a loved one dies of illness, or in an unexpected way, rather than of natural causes.

 

I'm lucky enough to still have 3 of my grandparents with me, but i did lose my grandfather about 6 years ago too to illness. I still really miss him too, some times more than others. I really feel for you. Is there anyone in your life who knew your Nanna, and who you might be able to talk to about her. I think it can be really nice to talk about your grief, but sometimes it's also really nice to actually talk about the person you're grieving, and all the things you loved about them. It's a really nice reminder I think that your loved one still exists in your heart, and that you're keeping them alive in memory.

 

Please know that you're not alone, i'm thinking of you during this time 💗

 
Lapis_Anteater
Lapis_AnteaterPosted 30-08-2024 11:32 AM

Hey @Lavender_Shrew

 

I’m sorry for your loss. It’s completely understandable and expected to miss her. Lossing someone you love is really difficult. No matter how much time passes, grief tends to remain. I think the grief you feel demonstrates just how much you loved your Nanna.

 

Is there anything that makes you feel closer to her? I tend to look at pictures of my dad when I miss him. It helps me remember the moments I had with him. It doesn’t bring him back, but at least he doesn’t feel as far away. Do you have a favourite memory with her? Sometimes thinking about the good times can be helpful.

 

Although you may not be able to be with her, she will always be a part of you. I’m sure you have some of her mannerisms and quirks. The relationship you have with her will always exist, it’s just in a different form.

 
Bel_RO
Bel_ROPosted 30-08-2024 10:03 AM

Hey @Lavender_Shrew

I’m sorry to hear that your nanna passed away from lung cancer. Grief can be so difficult to navigate and I can see that you’re really missing her. This is really normal to experience, so you’re definitely not alone with what you’re going through. I’d like to also thank you for sharing how you’re feeling with the community. Reaching out for support can be so tough, so you should be really proud of yourself! 

 

While it can be really sad and lonely thinking about a loved one who’s passed away, It can be helpful to reminisce on the good memories you may have with your nanna. This can bring happiness and comfort, knowing they were loved and spent time with you before they passed. Can you think of some good memories you had with your nanna? It can also be helpful to speak to family and friends about how you’re feeling, and share some memories you each might have with your loved one. 

 

I encourage you to explore this topic on Grief and Loss. Many of the articles explore the different ways we might work through grief, stories from others, as well as tips on how you can manage feelings of grief and loss. 

 

It’s also important to remember to do some self-care activities while you take this journey through grief and loss. I am wondering what you have been doing to take care of yourself during this time? In case you are interested in receiving additional support, I encourage you to connect with Kids Helpline. They are a free 24/7 phone and online counselling service for young people aged 5 to 25.

 

An email has also been sent to you to check in with you offline, so please keep an eye out for that!

 

 I hope this is helpful for you and look forward to hearing from you soon. 

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