cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 
Main content skiplink
Join an event. Happening today.

i need advice

so for context: i was best friends with this girl for 1.5 years. when I started dating my boyfriend, she got super mad and was constantly upset at me. she used to say stuff like "i can tell you're thinking about him" and "you guys are not going to last" whenever we hung out and at the time i didnt think anything of it. we're no longer friends nor on talking terms and its been about 2 years since we broke off. she was definitely a super toxic friend as she wanted me to spend all my time with her and was not supportive of my relationship. now, she's doing the exact same thing that she got so upset at me for: got a boyfriend. this is weirdly affecting me a lot. i got trust issues, lost all my friends and developed anxiety and depression partly because of her and constantly seeing her just triggers me. seeing photos of her with her bf on instagram weirdly triggers me and has led to anxiety attacks idk why since i still have my bf and am so in love with him. the advice i need is: should i unfollow/block her on instagram? the only reason that i'm hesitant to do it is because i don't want her to think she has won. by unfollowing her does it make it obvious that she triggers me? it's been so long since our friendship broke off that i'm kinda embarrassed that it still affects me. i also don't want to be in the situation where one of our mutual friends asks me why i unfollowed her. so should i unfollow her?

Cinnamon_Bear
Cinnamon_BearPosted 09-06-2023 06:09 PM

Comments

 
Chloe-RO
Chloe-ROPosted 10-06-2023 11:25 AM

Hey @Cinnamon_Bear ,

 

I hear you have been thinking about this for a long time. It must have been very difficult when you first started dating your boyfriend, to have this friend tell you it wasn't going to last.

 

I read that you feel this friend is 'super toxic'. I'm curious to know whether you still want or value her friendship. It's play if you don't, as friendship (by nature) change. However, if you do value her friendship, it's probably a good idea to have a chat.

 

As for whether to block/unfollow her, that is entirely your choice. If you feel it is doing you more harm than good, and you really don't think your relationship with this friend is going to continue, then there's no harm in blocking/unfollowing her. After all, don't we all go through our phones after a while and 'clean it up' to delete and remove whatever is no longer important to us?

 

However, I hear you feel you may give her the satisfaction of 'winning'. At this point, what's more important? Your mental health and wellbeing, or not giving her the sense of 'winning'?

 

Be guided by what you feel is best for YOU. 

 

We support you in whatever you decide.

Related spaces

Welcome back!

Join the Community

ReachOut is confidential & anonymous.

8+ characters, 1 capital letter, 1 lower case letter and 1 number

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.