Fitting in nowhere
Hi everyone, This is my first time here and I decided to try my luck posting what that is feeling not right in my current life! I am an international student who is depressed sometimes over friends. So I was surrounded by international students, mostly from China, Indonesia etc and I am the only one from my home country. I speak English, Malay, Chinese and Japanese pretty well so it never is a problem communicating. However due to different cultural background they sometimes do not understand why I treat something or do something the way I did. They treat and see things so differently that I feel isolated. So most of the time I keep opinions and comments to myself and just try to blend in. But I feel exhausted doing this and start missing my friends back home. I feel like if I do this any longer I will start to lose my own personality and will only be someone that they expect me to be (eg act/talk like a Chinese). I do not have any chance to make friends outside college but I cannot seem to find someone that I can open my mind or be honest with. Also since I do not have anyone close, I do not even have the chance to hang out with anyone this holiday. Only books and internet. I guess. I am not sure what advice I am seeking here but I guess I just want to talk about my issue here. Thanks for reading 😃
Comments
Hi Shino,
I'm sorry to hear you're feeling this way. I am only new here too. I never went to college/uni nor am I asian. I grew up with some asian friends, 1 of whom is now married to my step brother. You guys can really cook. I love asian food.
I hate reading about people having no friends or fitting in because I know how that feels. I've been there. I spent the 1st 16 yrs of my life not fitting in. It sucks. People can be very judgemental & outwardly critical or arrogant. It's quite rude in my opinion.
I wish I could just say "hey come & hang out with us". We're a very hospitible, friendly bunch. But that would be a bit weird. I just wanted you to know that there are people out there who would give you the time of day. We're not all stuck in our own little universe. You deserve some friends, true friends.
I also think you need to get out & away from campus & make some friends. I know it's hard & you don't know who to trust ect It's a very daunting thing. I wish you all the best & I hope you find a true friend soon.
First of all that is sooooo cool that you're able to speak 4 languages! I'm taking up Chinese (Mando) and Japanese next semester. Can't wait. I'm very excited. It's something I've wanted to do for a while now. I hear Chinese is heaps difficult. But we'll see. 🙂
By college you mean uni yeah? Have you thought about joining a few of the clubs or societies they have on/off campus? That's where I managed to meet lots of interesting people who I get to see frequently as well. Made lots of good friends from those. Or what about a sport? 🙂 I've always liked table tennis personally.
I almost forgot! WELCOME! hahaha I hope you do post more often on here as well. Whatever works for you.
