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I crave attention but push people away and I feel so alone

Nothing really makes me excited or is fun to me apart from talking to people (mostly getting attention from guys) and/or watching a show or youtube. Apart from that, nothing is exciting or interesting to me. I feel like theirs something wrong with me.
Also, I don't know why but I push people away, and thats problematic when most of my enjoyment comes from talking to people, wether its online or face to face (mostly online). I'm somewhat in a ditch right now because my friend started talking to a guy that I was talking to first and they are becoming really close and starting to have a thing. I think I might be jealous but I don't know why, or I don't want to admit that I am because its ridiculous as I never had feelings for him or even thought of him in that way, I just enjoyed talking to him randomly. I think I may be annoyed at them because of my constant need for attention from people and the fact that both my close friend and the guy I enjoyed chatting to are now talking less to me and more to each other, I feel very alone.
I probably wouldn't feel this alone either if I had other friends that I clicked with that I could talk to but about a month and a bit ago I turned down my guy friend who I was very close to and he hasn't messaged me much ever since, or when he does it is a very flat conversation and I get the idea he doesn't want to be friends anymore. Which I do respect him for as it might make him feel better but also hurts me a lot because its hard to say goodbye to such a great friend of 4 years.
Their are also friends who have gone off studying more and I understand when they say they are too busy to see me for a while but its been like that all year and I'm beginning to think that I'm just not good enough to be making time for. They don't even have to make time for me, I would be fine with the occasional message or online convo every month asking how I've been to show that at least they care a little? I feel like I could disappear from the face of the earth and no one would notice. Until maybe a week or 2 as they'll see I haven't been online since then. 

Anyway I feel like this might be similar to another post I've done, I apologise for all my posts on this site as they're much more like complaining rather than seeking help. Like I've said before, it just feels better to type up and I don't mind if people ignore the posts or not. 

Re: I crave attention but push people away and I feel so alone

hi there @anonymousgirl101  - the forum is a great place to express all of these thoughts and feelings, and I'm glad to hear that it helps you to do so Heart


That's quite a conundrum.. I can relate to feeling like talking and connecting with other people is my main source of excitement and joy - but it can be complex when you also feel like you're pushing people away. If you're a naturally empathetic person, then you connect well with other people - but pushing people away can be a response to feeling overwhelmed with others emotions and complexities.. do you think this could be something to do with it? 

Learning to prioritise yourself, and your own needs is a really important way to help this  -working on giving yourself the attention and love you crave, can help to curb the need for attention from others (of course we're all human, and all need others - that's perfectly normal!)

We have a new article out with 5 tips on how to do this if you're interested . 


The situation you talk about with your friend and the boy makes a lot of sense - I think anyone would be feeling similarly. It's really hard to feel excluded, or pushed out by anyone in your life. 

We're here to listen more if you need Heart

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