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TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

Hey guys,

 

I’m just making a new thread because my old one was getting quite long. Anyway the things I usually talk about or the things I’m struggling with are in the title Smiley Indifferent

 

Well my main problem right now is grief.. I’m not coping with my recent loss of my counsellor from 2 years Smiley Sad does anyone have any tips for dealing with grief?

 

 

Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

Hey @Bananatime04 , 

 

I'm really glad that you started this thread - I think grief and loss are something that a lot of us can really relate to, and this may sound weird but I think it's really good that you're recognising that what you're going through is a kind of grieving process for Macy. 

 

I have experienced different types of loss in my life, and I think the biggest take-away for me was to try and get rid of any expectations I had about how i "should" be feeling at any point in time, the grieving process looks different for all of us, and sometimes we can be really hard on ourselves when we're grieving, for example feeling like we 'should' be at a different point than what we are at. Does that make sense? So being kind to yourself is probably my biggest take away, and learning to honour that person's memory. 

 

I also really liked the tips in this ReachOut article about grief here and thought I'd copy them here for you in case you find them helpful: 

 

Things you can do that may help you in your grief

How you feel about what’s happened will change over time, so some of these things will work better at different times during the grieving process.

Grief time

Allow yourself 15 to 20 minutes each day to grieve. Make sure you’re in a space where you can be alone. Switch off your phone. This time is a safety valve – it’s an opportunity to allow yourself to deal with any feelings you’ve stored up. How you use it is up to you. Think, cry, pray, meditate, write or draw.

Keep a diary

Write down your feelings about your loss, as well as your memories of the person who has passed away. This is a great way to track how your grief is changing as the weeks and months pass, and can help reassure you, during difficult patches, that you’re making progress.

Let yourself cry (if you can)

Tears are often a sign of strength and show that you’re prepared to work through your grief. So, if you feel like crying, don’t hold yourself back. If you want to cry and can’t, though, don’t worry. A lot of people find it hard to cry, and express their grief in other ways.

Talk to someone you trust

Grieving can feel very lonely, and it’s a long process, so find someone you can talk to, such as a friend or family member. A lot of people find it helpful to talk to people who have been through similar experiences. If you think this might work for you, consider joining a support group.

Give it time

It can take a really long time to work through your lowest moments when someone has died, and it’s normal to feel like your life has been turned upside down for a while. It won’t always be this hard. Time will help to heal the emotional pain.

 

@Bananatime04  I think you're stronger than you know, and you will get through this, but it's okay to need time to grieve. Macy was a huge part of your life. 

 

 

Grief is not a place to stay - Open to Hope Foundation | Facebook

 

 

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Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

How're you going today @Bananatime04 

Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

Thanks @Janine-RO

Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

@Tiny_leaf I want to die

Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

@Bananatime04 Are you safe at the moment?

Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

Yep

Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

That's good @Bananatime04 

Can you think of anything that might help?

We could talk about what's going on, or about something random, or something else?

Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

I am sorry to hear that you are feeling that way @Bananatime04, it is good to hear that you are safe. Just want to quickly echo what Tiny_leaf has mentioned by asking what you can do today to help yourself feel better? Would it be helpful to spend some time cuddling Eddie? Heart

Re: TW: Grief, Depression, Anxiety, Self Harm & Suicide

No I’m spending the day laughing at myself, hating myself, insulting myself and just making myself my enemy

I just saw the stupid doctor and she wouldn’t stop talking about herself and her nervous diarrhoea that she gets and she wouldn’t stop clearing her throat and she went through a whole bottle of hand sanitizer (it was a big one too) and ugh she was so unhelpful
I’m also having a transfusion which will be fun

Yea I deserve all this pain so I’m just thinking of it as self harm