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over life

im really over life. these are the days i wish i had of been successful. 

ruined my self harm record of 8 weeks. 

sitting on that very fine line balancing, trying not to tip over the edge 

**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: over life

Hey @scared01, that sounds like a really scary place to be in Heart I imagine you must be feeling very overwhelmed. Does your self-harm need medical attention? Are you safe right now? What do you think is going to prevent you from tipping over the edge? I know it must be really tough for you with everything else that has been going on. You have been managing so well by reaching out for support Heart

Re: over life

hey @Taylor-RO
no it doesnt need medical attention, and i guess im safe even if its not something i really want to be.
honestly dont know whats going to stop this one, ive already been tryng the things that help but tonights tipped me so close to the edge that i dont know if im going to be able to stop myself
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: over life

Hey @scared01, from my experience, avoiding self-harm is way easier said than done and so every time I relapsed I would get so frustrated with myself, you know? But then I always think to myself that since I can avoid self-harm for a while, then surely I can do avoid doing self-harm again. What do you think of this? I agree with @Taylor-RO, you've been doing so well managing through your tough times and reaching out for support Smiley Happy

_________________________________________________________
Hope is just around the corner; you think it's not there when you first look straight ahead, but it actually is when you turn around

Re: over life

i am so tired of fighting. its not a tired that sleeo can fix either. its like a soul tiredness @Esperanza67
yeah ive been working on my self harm for nearly 2 yrs now. at least not doing it has lasted for 8 weeks this time
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: over life

That definitely sounds exhausting @scared01. It sounds like it would be great if you could have some time to recuperate. You have had such amazing progress Heart I agree with @Esperanza67 in that you should try not to give yourself a hard time about it but to remember how well you have done in the past... and can do again!

Re: over life

it is exhausting @Taylor-RO but my life roles and responsibilities and my anxiety doesnt let me stay still. ive had to sit for a while now though and get off my foot with a heat pack and hoping it helps along with pain meds.
its so upsetting and frustrating to be in this spot again. its tiring.
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: over life

lie it jsut so hard sometimes. i feel so trapped in where i am but without it im even more of a nothing then what i already am.
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**

Re: over life

Life is definitely difficult at times and it can be a rollercoaster. You have been through a lot and as you mentioned, it seems like you have to just keep going. You sound very selfless but this has also impacted the care that you put into yourself too. Is there anyway that you can have a tiny break or optimise the down time that you do have? Heart Good to hear you've been able to relax, has that been helping?

Re: over life

its always busy @Taylor-RO its a little busier since its holidays atm but its been quiet which is unusual. resting is helping abit. im watching a medical sho on the tv then a documentary on how hospitals work so im looking forward to that.
tomorrow might be a little quieter besides the drs which would be nice
**NEVER be afraid to ask for help because you're WORTH it!**