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hi, i’m not sure what to do so i feel like i just need to ask for some advice. i am a 16 year old girl, and this year has been hard. i’m an extremely dedicated dancer and i unfortunately tore a ligament in my ankle a week before competitions and had to pull out of everything. this had been something i was working towards for 10 years so devastated is an under statement. due to this i was having loads of time off school as i couldn’t walk so school became a second important. i’m in yeae 11, and i want to become a physiotherapist so grades are very important to me. i then had some really bad friendship issues where a close friend of mine got really mad at me for asking for help with my injury, she sent me a long paragraph essentially telling me i was a terrible person. the worst thing was that all of my other friends sided with her even though i was the one deeply struggling. since then i’ve been going through hell. side note i realised i was a lesbian about 4 years ago, which is when i developed a crush ona friend of mine. this crush has been ongoing now for 4 years and i realised she was my first love. long story short, she doesn’t like me back and i finally learned to move on. for the past 4ish weeks i’ve been really struggling with this as i do care about her so much and we are extremely close friends. i was crying almost everyday about her. school has also been extremely hard, as i’ve just been putting a lot of pressure on myself even when I’m been struggling because of all of this I started to struggle with quite bad panic attacks that were quite frequent and I’ve tried to speak to my parents but they basically told me I was making it up because they don’t really believe in mental health. my whole life I’ve been told I have anxiety or some form of ADHD or autism and that essentially I need help but my parents don’t believe me and I just don’t know what to do. after all of this, I found a new person that I developed a crush on and while it only lasted a week, it was the first time I have been happy in over a month. out of nowhere with no explanation she blocked me and I’m just starting to spiral again. I’m in my final week of exams and everything just getting too much and my mum is putting so much pressure on me that I don’t even want to come home. I’m an only child and my parents are very strict on me and I just want some free freedom and some time to myself, but I don’t get it. I don’t know what to do because I think I need help because I’m really struggling. i guess i just need advice, what do i do. i’ve tried talking to the school counsellor but one of the main reasons i’m struggling so much as well is due to my sexuality, which my mum also doesn’t believe. i’m not confident or open, and so i don’t know who i can tell the truth to.
Comments
Hey @Mulberry_Jaguar welcome to the forums 🙂 Thank you for sharing everything that's been going on for you recently. It can be really difficult to articulate things when so much is affecting your wellbeing and it's amazing to see your courage to do so in our community.
First off, I wanted to say I'm really sorry to hear what happened with your injury. I can imagine how devastating it would be to have to take time off dance and school when it's at such a crucial time for your competitions and exams. I can also see how hurtful it is when you just needed support from your friend and they came back and told you that you're a terrible person, and to be blocked by your crush. To have this happen while you are grieving and moving on from your love for your friend just makes it all incredibly difficult.
I wanted to commend your help-seeking skills as you have been able to connect with your school counsellor and friend. It's incredibly difficult when parents don't listen to us when we need support, so I was wondering how the school counsellor or any other friends have been helping you through this? Have you been able to find any strategies that help in those tough moments?
It also sounds like a difficult part of this situation is not being able to talk about your sexuality, as you have been going through a lot of emotional upheaval recently. I wanted to link you in with QLife, a service which allows you to talk to a peer about your sexuality, and ReachOut's PeerChat service which similarly allows you to speak to a peer worker 1-1 online. It might help you to have another outlet for discussing your sexuality, particularly in an anonymous setting.
You mentioned that exams are almost over, I was wondering if you have any plans for how to unwind a little bit and recover after this week? It's understandable that things are really difficult at this moment and you deserve to be supported ❤️ We're going to send you an email to check in, could you keep an eye out for that and respond when you get the chance?
