i'd say ur reply is pretty accurate.
i def agree with point two about why i self sabotage. it's happened so many times that i've tried something and it failed to help. like different medications. seeing a psychologist. now i understand there were reasons this stuff hasn't helped yet, wrong diagnosis etc etc. but it doesn't give me much confidence. and trying and failing is worse than never trying. it makes me feel even more hopeless and helpless. my perspective is slowly changing as i realise i had the wrong diagnosis and wrong meds. but it's so hard.
it feels like i'm addicted to this and i don't know why.
also point one is pretty good. i find it hard to trust people and be vulnerable. i like to be strong.
thanks for ur email, i'm about to look at it
