Thanks for your reply @Philippa-RO
I'm pretty tired this morning. But I've also had a pretty busy week. Thankfully today will be a bit less busy, although I'm getting my first vaccine so hopefully not many side effects!
Yeah and feeling depressed, but not suicidal. So while this isn't nice, it's absolutely nothing compared to what I've been through. And when I do get an intrusive suicidal thoughts, I remind myself that I haven't come this far to only come this far.
Thankfully those thoughts from yesterday are much calmer so far.
I don't know if I'll be able to talk to my psychologist about this. I've told her lots of times before that nothing feels real. But I've never had a day like yesterday before, at least not that I can remember. Which kinda makes me embarrassed about bringing it up because maybe it's not a big issue. But at the same time yesterday was scary. But at the same time the fact that it's only happened once makes me think it's not that bigger deal or that there's a chance that it's not even real. But at the same time it was really upsetting and probably worth talking about.
See this infinite loop I get into lol.
Yeah I think this anxious stuff is a problem I've had for ages, but it was pushed out of the way for the last year or so by my bipolar disorder being so intense. But now that's starting to calm down and be bearable (which is amazing), other stuff is coming back (which is not amazing).
Every day is different, so see what today brings I guess!
