Hey @inv1sible_0ne
Well, for one. Hello. I hope you are doing ok, mate. Life is often full of challenging moments and I hope this forum can help you through it. Just know a lot of people don't use labels as how can all of someone fit in a simple phrase, so don't worry about needing labels just now.
Tbh, why I replied initially was because I resonate so much with your circumstances. I am AFAB trying to figure out my gender identity (trans-masc non-binary for now) through this transition into adulthood. I feel pressured to conform to, not exactly gender stereotypes, but to be 'female' by my family even though it's often not intentional. Thus it's hard for me to experiment and learn about my identity, especially when I'm tied so much to my family, as I don't have any friends, really, and have never been in a relationship.
What is it that you have tried so far? Have you looked into any more masculine clothing or a change in haircut (even if it's just different rather than masculine)? The main thing I suggest is to try to find some time and ability to experiment with your looks and things. As there is only so much that you can read or learn, you need to feel what resonates with you.
I know my social anxiety makes me fixate on what's wrong with me and how people can perceive me but just know, that it is only worth it if you feel connected to yourself. Never hold yourself to someone else's standards or expectations, even if you want to maintain that relationship with them. How would they feel knowing you aren't happy with how are masking yourself for them?
I don't have much advice I'm afraid, so if you find any, let me know.
But just know that your post not only helps you but also others reading.
- Lee
P.S Sorry if this message seems incohesive. I didn't quite know what to say and kept changing it. 🙂 😁
