Hi there @Lilac24 ,
Thank you for sharing. Welcome to the forums. I'm sorry to hear how tough it is right now. It must be so difficult to sit with questioning whether you have made the right decision or not. It is understandable you feel hurt and torn right now.
What you are describing is not uncommon after a loss. This can be seen as a grief. That is, losing something that means a lot to you. There is no timeframe for how long the grieving cycle goes for. It's is important you have the right supports to help you live in the now and make helpful choices for your future.
Have you ever looked at any of Griefline's resources or contact them on 1300 845 745? This one may be of interest - Loss of a Relationship
Or perhaps for now, it's not about me 'throwing' resources at you - maybe for now you just need a listening ear? Please know you are not alone in this. ReachOut are here to see you through this difficult part of your journey.
