Hey @Scaredandalone234346
I'm so sorry for what you are going through and hope you're doing okay. As a victim of sexual assualt I know how hard it is to admit it was not your fault, which may be why you're feeling ashamed and embarrased, but consent does not count when you are drunk and not in a right state of mind so know that it is not your fault.
Even if you did give consent while drunk it does not truly count as consent, you may have said yes but you were not in a right state of mind. I see you mentioned that you said you should go home and that this colleague kept pushing for you to stay out, this is also not right of him, consent does not count if you have to persuade and press someone to do something.
Please don't be afraid to get support during this time. Sexual assualt is serious and can often cause some long lasting affects on your emotional wellbeing and relationships. If you are comfortable discussing this with your boyfriend I would recommend it, otherwise friends, family or even everyone here on the forums is a great place to start. It's not a nice feeling to be alone when going through these feelings. There's also a website, https://www.nasasv.org.au/support-directory that has links and contacts to sexual assault services across Australia, they have some great services including both in person groups/counselling and online sessions/help lines that may be useful for you. Also if any issues arise at work do not be afraid to mention what has happened to a manager, they may be able to change shifts so you do not have to work with this person, or they may be able to escalate this situation and possibly fire the person as even though it was outside of work hours, he was not acting appropriately.
Make sure you take care of yourself through this difficult time, there is a thread here on self care that may help you come up with ideas, and please reach out to someone if you need help, this can be a difficult thing to go through alone ❤️
