Hi Aera, it's nice to meet you!
Firstly, thank you for coming on here and sharing your story. I'm really sorry to hear that you've been going through such a challenging time. It definitely takes a lot of courage to talk about this, especially since you said you find it hard to open up.
I'm truly sorry to hear that you've been going through such a tough time, especially with the lingering impact of high school trauma. It's not uncommon for past experiences to have such an impact on our lives.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with you for wishing for a friend or wishing to feel happy again like when you were little. You're only human for wanting these things, and I can completely relate to the longing for the carefree happiness that comes with being a child.
Comparing your journey to others can be incredibly challenging, especially when it feels like you're not progressing in the same way. You just need to remember that everyone's on their own journeys and to be more patient with yourself as you're on your own path. However, I can imagine how hard it must be for you to see the people that hurt you in the past achieving those milestones.
I really commend you for taking the steps to help you improve things - taking medication, studying, working, and exercising - it just shows how capable and strong you are. Also knowing to take a break from uni for your mental health is really important. However, I can sense the frustration and feelings of being stuck that you're experiencing right now.
I'm curious about what might have triggered those thoughts about the past again, especially considering you thought you had moved past them. Feel free to share more if you're comfortable or anything you'd specifically like to talk about further.
Remember you're not alone with any of this and there's people to listen and support you as well <3.
@Aera_Dragon
