Hey @OneDayITellMyself
I like how you're able to pinpoint your specific emotions and thoughts around this. I used to feel this way too. I remember feeling like the only girl in school who someone didn't have a crush on. I was reserved around most and very academic too. You're definitely not alone, I'm sure this is more common than you think. And yeah - it can feel like a lonely experience. Everyone wants to feel desired and important and having someone like you can fulfil that need.
I think being female sometimes can be difficult because we're more likely to receive unwanted attention, which is what those girls may be referring to when they discuss their experiences of being 'checked out' or 'having to deal with a guy liking them.' I've received a lot of unwanted attention since beginning adulthood, and it definitely feels different (in a more negative way) as opposed to having a genuine connection with someone and someone genuinely liking and respecting you.
Is there perhaps someone you might have a crush on that you could get closer with? Someone you have sparkles in your eyes for? Maybe you could approach this situation in the reverse, getting close to someone?
