Hey @c0ndensation,
Welcome to the Online Community! Thank you so much for sharing this with us, it takes a lot of courage and bravery to be so honest about this and you should be really proud of yourself for taking that step. It sounds like there has been a lot going on for you which we are sorry to hear but we are really glad that you have found us and have been able to reach out for some support.
I am sorry to hear about what you have experienced growing up with your parents, it is understandable how difficult and challenging this must have been for you and the comments from your Mum about you being like your Dad must be so hurtful.
From what you have shared, it sounds like you have a very bright future ahead and I can see how determined and resilient you already are. It is also very clear how much you love and care about your sister - and she is very lucky to have you. It sounds like you try really hard to help her with everything, and it is okay when you also need to take some time for yourself or when you have your own studies and commitments that you need to focus on. I know you mentioned that you are a straight A student and I want to acknowledge how much of an achievement this is, especially with so much else going on and having to support your sister. You should be really proud of yourself for this! It is important to remember that taking time out for yourself is okay and it does not make you are bad person at all. I can hear how hard you are trying to manage everything and it must be a lot.
I was wondering if you have any other support in your life or if you’ve ever spoken to anyone about what’s been going on for you before? Whether it be a family member, teacher, GP or mental health professional. If not, is this something that you would consider? You deserve all the support available to you and you don’t have to deal with any of this on your own. We have some resources here about seeking support and types of support available if you want to learn more about this.
I know you mentioned that when you have these arguments with your mum, it always ends in you having a panic attack which is so tough. Do you have any coping strategies or is there anything that helps you through your panic attacks? We have some resources here around coping that you may find helpful. I also wanted to share these articles with you that I thought you might find helpful to have a look through. This one is about what to do if home is no longer a safe place and this one here is about conflict at home.
We've also sent you an email to check in so please keep an eye out for that.
Looking forward to seeing you back online again.
