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Samm38
Frequent scribe

Blended Family trouble

Hey Everyone, It's nice to meet you all! I am coming here today as i have struggled with something for a really long time but felt it wasnt really the right thing to talk to anyone about as firstly, they would tell my family which is exactly the opposite of what i want going on, or they wouldnt give me helpful advice. Anyway, the basic context is, my parents got divorced for as long as i remember, we have court orders so i see my dad every second weekend and mainly live with my mum, her partner and my brother and stepsister. We have all gotten along great for years despite our differences and being a blended family, and for those who know, you know it isnt the easiest to live in a blended family. Basically, my stepsister lost her real mother due to cancer when she was young, leaving her with unresolved issues as she never really saw a counsoller. Me and my stepsister have always been close, we are both almost adults. when i say that i mean in a sibling way of love hate relationship. Although something had shifted in the past two years, my mum has not been understanding of my stepsister anymore and always throws digs at her, has goes at her because my sister might make the smallest of mistakes and my mum will put her down for it. my stepsister is very quiet alot of the time because she lost her mum and she has big mood swings although i feel like my mum does not understand this, i have tried to tell her exept she now says that cant always be the exuse, she says my stepsister is spoilt and essientally i feel like my mum does not like her. my mum never points out what me and my borther do wrong it is always her, and gosh i feel sorry for her, i wish i could hug her but i feel helpless. because of this my mum and stepdad gets in fights, i feel like everytime at the dinner table when we speak and sometimes actually laugh like a normal family, it always moves into my mum having a go at her and the table becomes awkard, almost ALL THE TIME. i heard my stepdad and my stepsister talk, she said she feels like my mum doesnt repect her, and my stepdad said that he didnt get with us to make her feel bad, if my mum doesnt respect my step sister, the relationship will end. you can imagine how i feel all the time. like my family will come down, i always feel a fight is at the front door, its horrible. i actually feel helpless. like dont get me wrong we have good times, but my mum has this new anger at my stepsister that just wont go away and i want to help i just dont know how. i love my mum and everyone so much so i have no one to turn to. my dad isnt the best option as we arent the cloest. i lliterally feel like i need to watch what i say so nothing turns into a fight. 

 

 

could someone please give me advice, im really struggling here and i need to know what to do. if this be coping strats to deal with fights or stress as i have a panic attack when people raise their voice or just what do i do cause i feel shit

bless anyone who red this tysm i apperiate it:) 

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