hey @yeah_it_tahtperson 🩷
I am sorry to hear you have been struggling with your friendships. I understand how it feels to worry about friendships and how these will look after high school. I definitely take a quality over quantity approach to friendships, and because of that I truly have only 2 close friends. For me, one is from high school, and one is from my third year at uni. I will admit it was hard to make friends at uni as I was mostly online (thanks covid!) but now there are many opportunities to make friends and when you meet like-minded people it feels very easy, so I wouldn't worry too much. I believe in you!
Sometimes it makes me sad that I don't have more friends, or that I don't see them every single day, but that also makes me spend more time with myself. Getting comfortable doing things on my own (going shopping, to the movies, out to eat) has made me worry less about friendships as I kind of feel like my own best friend above all else. I know that takes time and may be hard given the places around you are expensive, or you dislike them etc. but I think that is something that has truly helped me.
As much as it can be hard, I think that you questioning and 'cherry-picking' these friendships is a good thing and is often needed to grow and develop as a person! I think it will also help you surround yourself with people who make you feel great 🫶🏻
