hi @7pennies
i completely understand what you're talking about. or perhaps to an extent, since im a transguy and have no idea what its like to be a lesbian. im sure either way, we both have our ups and downs.
im the only queer person amongst my friend group of nine besides myself. it's always been like that and my other queer friends had either moved to other schools or are distant right now.
i also see the struggle in dating and social relationships. being trans, it's hard for me to decide whether i should stay comfortable with girls because id socially relate to them more or try my luck with guys since i kinda pass. the issue is, im awkward as hell and i don't know what guys like despite my interests being mostly gender neutral.
not only that, in the rare event of me having a crush on someone, i have no idea whether that person prefers men or women so it does conflict to my own self presentation and instinctive want to appeal to them... which i know is really unhealthy and am working on.
i didn't mean to yap so much about myself 💀 i js wanted to say that yeah its hard but honestly? you're not alone even though it kinda feels like it. it's easy to imagine having a queer irl and automatically clicking with them to experiences like these
