Hey @keroppi
When reading your post, I saw myself in it. I developed social anxiety when I was 11 and struggled with it until I was 20. I was too scared to get a job during high school because of my social anxiety and other commitments that took up time such as university keeping me busy. I'm 22 and have now never had a job. I've been applying for jobs but the job market is tough, people understand it's not always easy to find employment. My old psychologist didn't have a job until she was 24. A lot more people are in the same position as you than you realise. You are not a failure for not having worked, you are a human being who is going at life at their own pace. You're going to go to an employment service, you're trying and doing the best you can and even if you weren't going to go there there's no problem with that either. It's life at your own pace.
Have you tried volunteering work? It helped a lot with improving my social anxiety as well as seeing a psychologist. In my experience people are really nice and non judgemental as they're just happy you're helping out. It looks great on your resume, it's rewarding, it will make you step you out of your comfort zone and give you some insight into what working could be like. I highly recommend it and you can find opportunities on websites like seek volunteer.
You are spending your time improving your physical health and learning new stuff things, and those are great ways to grow and improve your mental health. You absolutely deserve food and gifts, your mind is lying to you. I'm 22 and haven't had a job, I realise circumstances have prevented me from getting a job, I am going through life at my own pace and a job doesn't define if someone is a failure or not. Take each day as it comes and remember you are not worthless whatsoever. Treat yourself with kindness 🙂
