Advice please?
Hello, I’m a year 8 high school student, and recently I’ve been wanting to get into a popular friend group. I’m in the ‘weird kid’ group at the moment, unfortunately, but I am not disliked and have students from popular groups talk with me now and then. I want to find ways to be able to become more popular and gain more good friends and I need advice on that.
Comments
Hey @Kenzie
From my personal experiences in high school (but school in general). I have quickly learned of the importance of the utilization of the modern technology we have all been blessed with, especially at such a young age. Personally I'd probably try to talk to these people on social media if you are to anxious, I am also suggesting this is because talking to these people on social media will provide you with ample time to think about what you are saying and how to say it. (Best part is that you don't have to worry about reading body language.😀)
Even if you are seen as weird, this is definitely far from being a bad thing. If by any chance these people don't like you for you, ditch em! The fact that you seem to have developed a decently positive relationship with some of these popular students is already a great start. Besides, if worse comes to worst, who cares? Your in Year 8 and you have plenty of time ahead of you, realistically there is a good chance you could possible drift a part from most of the people you've met in high school.
So just remember to be yourself and to talk to them from time to time to keep them around you, but not to much to the point that it may come across as being clingy or annoying. You seem like a pretty nice person, and if by any chance anyone doesn't like you for you? Who cares, their opinions shouldn't mean anything to you. So try to pick your friends carefully.
hey kenzie, i'm a year 9 highschool student and this is my 3rd year. i've been in and out of the friend groups you so call "popular", the main thing every popular person wants is a true friend. if you eventually just start talking to them friends thru friends im sure you'll get to the path you want to. and trust me im in so called weird friend group too but just cause we look or act weird doesn't make us the specified weird group and that goes to you and your group too.
Hey @Kenzie
I've definitely felt like this before in high school and have been in your position in a sense. Is there any reason specifically for wanting to be more popular at school? How are you feeling now in your current friend group? Are there any specific reasons for wanting to move groups?
In regards to making more friends I would defintely try to communicate with them more and find ways to get closer. You could perhaps ask to sit with them at lunches and such from time to time? I know that for me when I was in high school, the group that I sat in at lunch became very close-knit because some of the best and funniest memories took place at lunch time and it was a bonding experience sitting together and eating. This could be a very good first step before branching out and, as previously suggested by another user, doing activities and social plans and such with them. Defintely also a good idea to try and find common interests with them, as these can lead to bonding experiences too.
Best of luck to you 🙂
Thank you so much! I'll be sure to try those things out.
In answer to your questions, the main reason is just to expand my social circle and avoid being one of those awkward kids who people dislike. And it's just difficult with my current friends as during breaks sometimes it isn't very enjoyable as they spend all their time in the library on devices, which leaves me to do nothing as I have no one else to hang out with.
Hey @Kenzie makes sense! It would not be enjoyable at all, I can totally see where you're coming from. In that case, it's defintely a good idea to find more friends you can do activities with during breaks 🙂
Hi @Kenzie ,
Thanks for reaching out for advice regarding a transition in your friendship group. I think a good place to start would be to know exactly what you are looking for in a friend (e.g., loyalty, honesty, humour, etc.,) and the reasons behind your desire to become part of the 'popular' group at school. Knowing this will help you best judge the type of people you want to surround yourself with. An important thing to remember is not to burn any bridges with the people you are currently hanging out with.
I would recommend engaging in more conversation and activities with the people you want to get closer with. This could be talking to them outside of class, asking about their interests or inquiring about social plans they may have to see if there is a potential you could join them. This will allow you to get to know them on a deeper level and start to branch out by being involved in activities with their friends too. Also, when people from the popular group do talk to you try and make the conversation a meaningful one and express interest in hanging out with them. I know it might seem daunting but unless you put yourself out there, it will be hard to extend your social network 😊
Thank you very much, I will 100% give that a go! And I apprieciate the advice and reminder not to burn any bridges with current friends, I'll ensure not to do that. 🙂
