friends and formal
I am really overwhelmed right now.
Last term, I was really busy with school and extraccurriculars, so i didnt get to spend much lunch time with my group. I was still close with them, and thought everything was fine, hanging out ater school etc. i made an effort this term to get some balance back and have msot lunchtimes free. what i didnt realise is my group has drifted part, and whilst i still have 'freinds' i dont really have a close group to be with anymore. As an extrovert, this makes me feel really lonely, as because i was busy, i deprioritised making more friends and was trying to focus on getting deeper relationships with a few (8-9). i still have all these, but its hard bc they arent together anymore so its really scary.
The other thing thats scary with this is that i go to an only girls school, but all my friends in their own different groups have been haning out with boys from the brother school after school. i was invited to a few, but was really tired and didnt think much of it, instead prioritising 'group hangouts' (but now we arent even a group anymore). The formal of that school is literally in three weeks and they have all gotten close with boys from different groups who have invited them to formal. now it is too late and i cant go with because i dont have a date, and all the boys my friends know are taken. i dont know where else to meet boys outside of friends, as all my extracurriculars are netball (a girls sport) or things run through school, and i dont have time for more or to get a job.
The problem is i literally know no boys who arent either really creepy and older or younger, or are already taken family friends.
I know i shouldn;t care, but i do!
I feel really lonely and left out as they are all planning outfits and arrangements for pres and afters, but there is literally nothing i can do.
Do you have any advice. To move groups completely would be really hard as the old group was literally all my best friends, and they still are, and want to include me, but its just hard and im really struggling.
has anyone else had something similar?
what did you do?
how do i get a date for three weeks?
what do i do for my formal at the end of next term (the latest one of all the schools), when all the boys and alll my besties are taken?
Comments
can you maybe ask your friends to go with you as a group thing instead of dates? Even just one friend
Hi @cats1234 , nice to hear from you!
I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling really overwhelmed, it sounds like you've got a lot on your plate at the moment. I definitely experienced something similar with my friends during high school - even though I still had close relationships with a lot of the girls in my old group, it felt really weird when my group started to drift apart. It can feel a bit strange when group dynamics shift, and when you start hanging out with people one-on-one instead of in a big group setting. Have you spoken to any of your friends about what's been going on? Are any of them finding the adjustment difficult too?
I can hear that you really want to get involved in your brother school's formal, and that not having a date means that you're feeling a bit left out of all the things that your friends are organising. Is there any way for you to attend without a date? As for your own formal, what options do you feel like you have? If there aren't any boys that you're particularly interested in taking, could you organise to go to your formal with a group of friends? It sounds like a lot of them have dates, but could a group of you meet up beforehand and all go together? Some of my friends had dates to our formal, and some of us didn't, so we all just went together as a big group of guys and girls. Does that sound like something that could work for you?
yeah it does. i don’t think there’s any way in can go but it’s ok. mine is still in ages so i think that sounds goo
i was just a little overwhelmed
Hi @cats1234 
I hope you're okay, its definitely a tough situation to be in, and I'm sorry to hear that you have not been feeling the best because of it. I would be overwhelmed in your situation too. Honestly for my formal, there was a good amount of people who didn't have dates, and a lot of my mates were happy to be there. I know there is a lot of pressure sometimes for these things, but I hope at the end of it all you are still able to enjoy your time.
I just wanted to check up and see how you were feeling.
