venting on 19/10/22
Um
I have a boyfriend who um has started emotionally abusing me and um well I don't really know what to do. His threatening me to expose some of my deepest, darkest secrets to my family, friends, and the police.
I feel very hurt and sad and depressed, and I've cried so freaking much, like everything hurts so much.
Also, he started doing this because well I...I wasn't the best girlfriend either. I um lied to him about a lot of stuff and now I think he's releasing his anger and hurt and feeling of betrayal at me. I made up a whole bunch of lies about myself and he believed them but one day ago I told him the whole truth.
I don't even know if I can send this email.
And...and...and he has the audacity to sleep peacefully as if nothing happened. I asked him if I could send it. And he didn't even reply. And also I don't know why his sleeping is making me more angry, frustrated, hurt, sad and depressed way more.
He said he's going to be controlling my every move and that means I....I can't do anything without asking him, and this fact it hurts so much and I just don't know what to do anymore.
I can't sleep anymore.
I can't eat anymore.
I can't have fun anymore.
My mind can't think straight anymore.
I feel sick.
if anyone can provide advice it would be much appreciated thanks 🙂
Comments
Hi @batoolxx_12 
I agree with the others that being emotionally abusive has no excuse. I'm really sorry that you're feeling so horrible. Do you have anyone professional you can speak to? Or anyone who can try to look after you at home and make sure you look after yourself by eating and sleeping?
It must be really exhausting to deal with all this and it's not ok. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect.
How have the last few days been?
Hey @batoolxx_12 
Sorry to hear that you're in such a difficult situation. It must be really emotionally exhausting for you. I also agree that there's no excuse for controlling and abusive behaviour in any relationship.
I understand you're saying that you haven't been the best girlfriend because you haven't been honest about some things, but that's no excuse either for your boyfriend's behaviour towards you. Also, it takes courage to admit faults of your own (even I have trouble doing that sometimes), so I want to acknowledge your bravery.
I hope the forums can be a place where you release your emotions and vent or ask for support, but I also hope you're able to get external support too.
What kinds of things do you like to do to help yourself feel better on days you're down? 💙
Hey @batoolxx_12
Thank you so much for reaching out to us and for sharing what you’re going through. I am so sorry to hear that you are experiencing this, it sounds like it has been such a difficult time for you and it takes a lot of bravery to talk about this.
Whilst you have said there is some distrust in the relationship, it doesn't make it ok for a partner to control you in such ways. I wanted to share some articles around unhealthy relationships and emotional abuse.
I also wanted to share a service with you called 1800Respect, they have some really great resources and you can reach out to them to speak to someone over the phone or through webchat if you ever wanted more support.
It’s great that you have been about to vent about what’s going on because it sounds like it has been very difficult for you. I was wondering if you have any other supports or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to about this. You don’t need to answer this on the post, but it is a good thing to start to consider.
I also wanted to let you know that we have sent you an email so please keep your eye out for that.
Remember that we are all here for you and that you aren’t alone!
