Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Self harming

I started self harming about 2 weeks ago. I started doing it because I was feeling bad about my body, but now I'm doing it to stop myself thinking and worrying too much, and it kinda feels like I'm getting addicted. I don't know what to do, and I need a way to hide it so my parents don't see. I don't do it a lot but they're taking a while to heal.

Re: Self harming

Hi @Mortimer


Welcome to RO. I have edited your post a little to fit within our community guidelines. These are in place to help keep out community safe Smiley Happy


It sounds like you are going through a difficult time at the moment. It is great you have takent the courage to reach out here.


Have you considered trying to do something else during the times you feel like self-harming? To prolong the craving, possibly long enough until it passes? We have a thread of 100001 coping strategies where you might find some ideas of something you could do. Or, is there anything you like to do which might distract you during those times?

|| Life runs in cycles, the wheel never stops turning, no matter how dark the night morning comes, no matter how cold the winter, spring comes. When you feel despair know that the wheel is turning, joy will come. ||

Re: Self harming

Sorry for accidentally breaching the guidelines, I swear I didn't mean too.

I had a look at some of the coping mechanisms, and they sound like good ideas, so I'll try to implement them. Funnily enough, typing this message is actually stopping me from self harming again, and last nights message stopped me from self harming, so this is helping in more ways than one.

Thanks for the great advice and support, and I hope this message fits the community guidelines.

From Mortimer

Re: Self harming

Hey @Mortimer, that's totally cool. I used to do it every now and again too!

It takes a lot to share what you have, I'd like to commend you on that, it's really brave. Especially if you haven't spoken about it before.
It makes me smile to see that these forums have helped you avoid self harming! You can always come here as a coping strategy or distraction Smiley Happy can you think of any activities or techniques that used to help when you felt frustrations or worry building up?
we are what we repeatedly do - aristotle

Re: Self harming

I know it's been a while since I last posted. I've been reading about how to stop self harming, but I don't want to stop. I'm doing it more frequently, and it feels good and no one knows about it, and I'm good at hiding it. I know I shouldn't but I like it.


Re: Self harming

That makes a lot of sense @Mortimer.


Sometimes it can be kind of scary to talk about the reasons we self harm - because pretty much everyone chooses to self harm because on some level, it works. It's meeting a need you have - it feels good, and it's helping you when you feel bad. A lot of the counsellors here where I work call it a 'maladaptive coping strategy' for that exact reason: it is something that is helping you cope. The problem is that at the same time, it's causing you some harm.


What do you think of that? Does self harm feel like it's working for you? Does it feel like anything else could work that well?


Re: Self harming

Hi @Mortimer, thanks for staying in touch with us!  It sounds like you're still functioning pretty well, so it's important that you take the time to really think about what youre choosing to do right now. 


Why you like to self-harm? How does it make you feel and what are some of the thoughts you have when you are doing it? What does it give you?  Who can you talk to about this?


I really encourage you to be brave and talk with someone about whats going on for you right now, and try and find alternative coping methods whilst youre still on top of things.  Self harm can make us feel better over the short term, but is dangerous and has some real long term consequences.


If you're struggling to think of other things to do next time you want to hurt yourself, we'd love it if you'd jump on here again and let us know whats up! (you could also talk to lifeline (13 11 14) or kids help line).


Let us know how youre going!

Re: Self harming