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Re: TW: Checking in

That is more than okay, I will leave it open for you @Bananatime04 Smiley Happy I am so proud of you for so bravely sharing what is going on for you right now. You mention being scared of living and having a lot of questions as to why you are here. Do you want to explain a little bit more about what makes you feel scared?

I need to log off for the night but please do something to relieve some of the tension and distress you have felt today. It could include chatting to a helpline or a distraction like listening to music, watching TikTok or playing with Eddie. Sometimes I spend an hour scrolling on TikTok without even knowing! We trust that you know what is most helpful for you. You are such a strong and resilient person Heart

Re: TW: Checking in

@xXLexi_Lou122Xx but I’ve done many sins.. I don’t wanna go to hell but I feel like I am if there is a hell 😓
I’m just scared
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Re: TW: Checking in

@Taylor-RO I’m scared of living because it’s so hard and I’m struggling so much that I don’t wanna see what my future holds but I’m even more scared of dying because I don’t know what happens after that if anything but it will happen eventually then I’ll be dead, in a coffin, on my own, I don’t wanna be alone.

I’m sorry I stayed up crying all night Smiley Sad
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Re: TW: Checking in

Hey @Bananatime04

 

It sounds like you've had a really tough night dealing with some really difficult thoughts. I thought I'd check in with how you're feeling at the moment, and whether you're safe?

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Re: TW: Checking in

@Andrea-RO Of course I’m safe.. I’ve been saying I’m scared to die so that means I’m not going to kill my self and I’ve been saying I feel bad for self harming as I found out it’s a sin so that means I’m not gonna self harm.. how else would I not be safe?

I’m listening to this song and.. I’m confused 😕 I’m not sure if I am allowed to post what it’s saying??
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Re: TW: Checking in

@Bananatime04

I understand that you are feeling frustrated at the moment, however, I can see that you've had a very difficult past week, and you've had a lot of tough thoughts. It's most important that we can ensure your safety while you are on the forums, so we can work towards a solution. 

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Re: TW: Checking in

I am safe though? I’m not frustrated, I’m sad.

I’m sorry
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Re: TW: Checking in

@Bananatime04  Are you religious? I don’t mean to pry I was just thinking if you are some people find being at spiritual places to be kind of calming/reassuring and maybe if you were able to you could go somewhere like that or maybe there is a spiritual item you could get to take with you? Sorry if this is not relevant to you if it isn’t you can just ignore it. I hope you feel better soon. 

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Re: TW: Checking in

@Eden1717 thank you but I’m really not sure.. I’ve gone to a catholic school since prep and I was catholic up until two years ago where I’ve began to question the meaning to life, whether there is an afterlife, a god, a purpose to anything. No one actually knows the real answer for sure so I don’t see a point in following a religion that may not even be true. I am just so lost, I’ve never felt this way before Smiley Sad
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Re: TW: Checking in

@Bananatime04  That is hard, having your whole belief system shaken up like that must be really unsettling and scary for you. It is normal to question these things and although it is super hard because we really can’t give any answer for sure either way I think sometimes it can be good to help you figure out what your core beliefs and values are when you have to completely re-think things. That being said I won’t deny it can be extremely painful and upsetting going through it.

 

I guess it is one of those thing we have to find a way to live with the anxiety it causes being so uncertain. For me when I get stressed out about this stuff I try and either focus on stuff that is right in front of me and not so abstract or I just remember that it is not something I can control and so worrying about it right now isn’t going to be productive, i guess I try and make sure that what I am doing is something I want to be doing then when I worry about it I don’t feel so much like I have wasted time or so much pressure. But I guess sometimes I also just let myself cry if I need to sometimes it is helpful to just let yourself feel things and sit and feel them for a bit. But idk what works for you everyone is different.