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The Dark Days Are Not Over

I have too many feelings right now. Sad, Overwhelmed, Lost, but at the same time I feel nothing, a cold emptiness. I dont even know why I feel this way. There are so many things. Then there is nothing. I cant pinpoint one thing from the other. How can you feel everything and nothing all at once?

I feel as if I'm split right down the middle. Two very different sides of me. So much to say now, so Unable to say it.

 

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Re: The Dark Days Are Not Over

Hey @endommage
I cant imagine how confused you feel right now and I have had moments where I feel emotional and all this just comes on me and all I want to do is cry. Has something happened for you to feel this way?

Maybe expressing how you feel on paper might help you work through these feelings or maybe you could do some self care, exercise, sleep (being exhausted sometimes makes me feel like this). What do you think you could do right now to feel a bit better?
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**Believe in the power of you because you are your own hero**
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Re: The Dark Days Are Not Over

Nothing happened. My day is just like yesterday. I've been triggered. Not to eat by friends unaware. Though I cant control, when I'm offered food. People keep saying you want this and I get frustrated because of course I do of course I want food. I want to eat until I'm 150% full because I love to binge. But I'm trying to stop. And this is upsetting me. Its not all about that though. There are many things. But like I said it feels like nothing at the same time. Because all of that seem insignificant to what I'm feeling.

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Re: The Dark Days Are Not Over

Hey @endommage - would the right word be that you feel numb? I do know how that feels, when you have so many emotions whirling around inside of you and yet you can't seem to process or focus on any of them. When you feel overwhelmed, it does help to do something soothing that feels good and stops your mind from circling around the same thoughts. You could try going for a bath, taking a walk or watching your favourite movie. Like Rue, I feel like this when I'm exhausted so getting some sleep might also help.

 

Do you currently have a counsellor that you can speak to about being triggered to binge? The Butterfly Foundation have a support line with ED counsellors that you can speak to (until 9pm tonight) - 1800 33 4673.

 

 

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Re: The Dark Days Are Not Over

hey @endommage 

 

Things sound really full on for you at the moment. I'm sorry that you're struggling the way you are. It can be so hard to describe the way we feel, particulalrly when those feelings are really overwhelming. And conflicting.

It really sounds like you could do with some support. Someone that might help you sort through your feelings and help you understand them a little better. Have you ever tried counselling?

There are some great options you could try. Do you find writing easier than talking? If so, KHL and LifeLine have webchat options. You can even write out what you want to say and then cut and paste it into the conversation.

If you're comfortable with talking, you could give their phone options a go.

You could also try Headspace which provides face to face support at their centres.

Does any of that sound appealing? Smiley Happy