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i dont have friends

When I was in high school I had friends, my bff was a guy and girl from my class, i had others too but this two were my closest one. Anyway, when we finish high school she decided not to talk to me anymore and she also spread rumors about me so no one could talk to me, ohh and did I mention she was my cousin, not close one but she was my cousin, and the reason why she did that is because her sister stole my boyfriend, and she didn't want her sister to have any fault. She says rumors like: I like to hang out with married mans, I like to hang out with a lot of guys etc so with one word she made me slut. And I didn't know what to do that time so I ended up alone for a long time until I went to university, but even now after 5 years no one from high school is talking to me. I feel bad cause I don't have a friend to hang out in my city or just for a cup of coffee. What should I do,,I'm so alone here.
Ow and for the guy I said he was my bff he also isn't talking to me but the reason is because he got engaged and now he is only talking to guys. Weird he?
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Re: i dont have friends

Hi @bella9378,

Welcome to Reachout. I'm sorry to hear that you lost two close friendships after high school. And that gossip led to your high school friends turning away from you. Unfortunately, when we make big life transitions like moving from high school to university, sometimes our friendships don't make that transition with us.

But you don't need to stay lonely! Do you do any activities where you get to meet new people? Or have you gotten to know any of your fellow students from university?

Here are some tips on how to make friends which might give you some ideas for meeting new people and making new friends:

How to make friends.

 

Good luck!
blithe

 

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Re: i dont have friends

Its tough when you lose contact with good friends. Sometimes you have to think of it as an opportunity to make new friends. I have found team sport to be a great way to make friends as well as keeping fit.
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Re: i dont have friends

Hey @bella9378, I'm really sorry to hear that you've lost two of your closest friends! I know that sometime's it is hard to take a positive from situations like this, but I think right now you have a great oppertunity to surround yourself with people who will treat you nicely and not spread mean rumours about you.

 

After I finished high school I stopped hanging out with a majority of people I went to school with, not because we didn't like each other or anything, just because we had different interests and wanted to do different things. One thing that really helped me through that time was my hobbies - I really like gaming. I found it a little bit hard to just go up and talk to people that I hardly knew, so instead I decided to join some online communities and forums. I met some really cool people that shared my interests and that I could talk to about my favourite video games and even play together with online.

 

Have you had a chance to talk to your male friend and tell him that it's hurting your feelings that he isn't talking to you? Sometimes people get so wrapped up in something that they don't realise the effect that they're having on other people meaning that they might need someone to speak up and let them know how they're feeling.

 

Best of luck! Don't forget there are lots of fun people on Reach Out to talk to about cool things too (:

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Re: i dont have friends

@bella9378 Sounds like its been tough for you, its pretty normal to feel lonely in your situation. Being lonely and having nobody to hang out with really does suck, been there. Sometimes people drift apart.

You can get out and make new friends. I hope it works out and you feel better. Is there anything you love doing? Maybe you could join something.

Hope it all works out and you feel better.
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Re: i dont have friends

Ok im sad i have lots of Hobbes but but When people here my acsent they switch of. Im pom just want to make some mates

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Re: i dont have friends

Hey @Mushman - sorry to hear you're having a hard time making friends over here. I think accents are really cool and I love chatting to people who come from different places. Perhaps your classmates will feel this way soon too. Have you read any of our fact sheets on meeting new people?

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Re: i dont have friends

Your not alone.
I have just joined this due to feeling lonely and never reachedout before.
I come from scotland and have no family here in Australia and been here 10 years now and have a few freinds but noone that takes real time out to visit me or go for a coffee with.
I have great kids and husband but miss having a best freind or a good freind.
I dont know why we have found it hard to make freinds here but im still hoping.
you are young and all I can say if the freinds you had up and left you then they dont deserve to have you as a freind.
You will meet new freinds as you go thru your life, some will go and real freinds will be there for life.....stay true to yourself x
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Re: i dont have friends

Hi @white-lilly,

Welcome to ReachOut. I'm glad you found us! You seem like you're a thoughtful and caring person, since the first time you posted here was to offer support to someone else - thank you for that. Smiley Happy

I hope you'll stick around and meet some people on ReachOut. You can introduce yourself over here if you like:

And if it helps, there's also a fact sheet with some tips on making friends. Smiley Happy Everyone deserves to have friends that take the time to spend time with them and check in to see how they're going - so I hope you keep looking til you have friends like that. Smiley Happy

 

Cheers!
blithe