some random high school dude tried to approach me and it made me really uncomfortable
So I was inside a shopping mall standing infront of one of the asian bakeries looking at some food they got on display, and then I came across a group of high school guys (they look like year 7s??) that walk past, however one of them turned around and kinda looked at me for a few seconds or so and then he came up to me and complimented my phone case. As soon as he did that, I immediately started to walk away towards where he was at but to a completely different direction, and then thats when he and his mates immediately laughed and ran away. After that I've found somewhere else to sit for a bit and then I decided to go up the stairs and then stand at one of the areas whilst typing something on my phone. A minute after that, that same dude and his mates appeared and then he came up to me and was like "uh hey there". I immediately walked off again and then he and his friends immediately laughed and then ran away (they ran the other way) again.
I knew this was completely sus, but what was he trying to approach me for??? Was he trying to get me to do a survey for his high school, or trying to hit up on some girls??? So for me I'm small and look innocent but I'm actually an adult, so for a teen to hit up on an adult wouldn't be very ideal.
I'm now back home in my student accomodation. Like literally what on earth just happened, and why did he decide to target me???
Are they're all trying to spy on me and keeping track of where I go? Gosh I really hope not!!
I feel like people like him chooses to target the ones that look innocent and are of a certain race and that are alone, like in that case, I was (I'm always alone though but yeah)..
Comments
Hi there @Blueberries
What an odd interaction, that sounds really scary. It's been a few days now and I'm wondering how you're going?
Most high school kids are generally chill and keep to themselves these days, I'm wondering why these kids approached you. In my experience, sometimes it's just for a laugh, joke, or dare, especialy if they run away laughing afterwards (however that doesn't make it any more okay).
I hope you're taking care of yourself 💜
Hi @Green_Ghost
Right now I'm doing good and better than I did on that day. I've been working on my assignments and have submitted my image analysis assignment yesterday. Now time for the waiting game. I hope to at least get somewhere higher than 50%, as 50% is the minimum mark for a pass. I have a feeling I'm gonna get somewhere within the 50s or the 60s at the very least to be honest, as I'm not confident that I'm gonna get anywhere higher than that.
Yeah, the fact that teenagers do things just for the sake of attention or the lols is what irritates me about them. In fact, I even came across a reply that someone responded to on a reddit post - on the reply, the person mentioned that she was approached by 3 high school boys at a retail store, one of them asked her for her number and after she gave them her number, he then said "thanks" and then they all laughed out loud after the conversation ended whilst they all walked away.
I'm glad I chose to walk away as soon as possible as I don't wanna end up encountering a similar situation like that.
I also got in contact with my current psych's service to get them to cancel all of my upcoming sessions with my psychologist as I don't wish to continue it. I've come to the conclusion that seeking psychological/counselling therapy isn't really for me at the end of the day.
Hi there @Blueberries
Thank you for your update. I hope everything goes well with your assignment!
I'm also glad you chose to walk away as soon as possible, it doesn't sound like a pleasant situation to be in.
It sounds like you've also made the big decision to cancel therapy. Sometimes therapy isn't for us at certain times in our lives, or we don't gel with the psychologist we're seeing. I think it's also important to remember that there's so many different types of therapy available and this could be something worth considering in the future if you ever consider seeking counselling services again?
Best of luck 💜
@Green_Ghost @Yeah, the service where there’s a neurodivergent counsellor at that my peer worker recommended to me is my last resort. I haven’t contacted the service yet as I’m currently not ready to seek counselling over there (specifically with her) yet.
I’m excited to start studying the psych units (4 units in total - 2 from Sept till November, another 3 from December till February) in the next upcoming months after I complete this undergrad certificate of fine arts hopefully by the end of august. I’ve always been very interested in psychology in general due to personal experiences but also cause I’m always interested to know the causes behind certain behaviours and all. Then hopefully I can pick the bachelor in fine arts next year - particularly next March? (along with doing some other psych units as electives) IF I’m able to pass/complete the 4 psych units by next February.
@Blueberries it sounds like you have another option that your peer worker has recommended to you, that's excellent! It's totally okay to not feel ready to enter into another therapeutic relationship yet, definitely okay to take your time. It's so important to seek support when we're feeling ready rather than jumping into it, I feel that's when we can get the most out of the services available.
I'm wishing you so much luck with the units your excited to study. It's always so great getting excited about upcoming units!! I find that everyone who's interested in studying psychology always has personal experiences attached to it, it's so great that we can use this motivation from our own experiences to want to help others 💜
@Green_Ghost thank you!! I can imagine it being rewarding too, especially when we help others that go through the same or similar things as we do. ❤️
How have been doing today and within the past week btw? Hope you've been well 😊
I've been doing great thank you @Blueberries it's so nice of you to ask 🥰
Carrying on strong with my volunteering, been taking lots of time to myself and buying myself nice things (3 Juicy Couture bags 😂), did a one-way video interview for a potential peer support job (fingers crossed I get invited to an interview 🤞). Life's been good 😎
Hey again @Blueberries
That sounds like a scary situation, it's good that you stayed away from them and did not entertain them.
I totally get you when it comes to stranger interactions, I'm extremely jumpy and anxious all the time so I try to cut as much contact I have with people mostly because it places undue stress on me. You handled it very well, good on you!
Has this happened to you before or do you know them?
In any case, I suggest writing down what they looked like in a journal and perhaps the school uniform they were wearing. Just as a precautionary method if this occurs more than once and causes you more anxiety, you'll have written the details down for the relevant authorities in your area.
Stay safe and kind regards!
~ Stego
@Sky_Stegosaurus it has happened to me before but its usually the younger adults that do these kinds of approaches to other young people. its the tactic they all used to try and get someone to try and join their cult, and they mainly target the ones that are asian and are alone, which in this case i was, but i've always been alone whenever im out but yeah. but for a high school student to be doing this is very unusual and even more sus.. just hope that i wont need to encounter that teen again.
Hey @Blueberries
It sounds this experience has left you a bit frightened which is completely understandable. He could have approached you for a number of reasons like you say, so it’s hard to know what his intention was. I’m sorry you had to deal with this guy and his friends while in the shopping centre.
Although it may be scary or come across as a bit blunt or rude, I think in future you are completely within your right to create some boundaries and simply ask them to leave you alone. Or, if you ever feel in danger, alert someone like a security guard.
I can hear that it may have stressed you out a little, so I want to just remind you about the importance of self-care. It would be nice to do something for yourself as a way to reduce the yucky feeling that uncomfortable experiences can create for us. Do you have a go to self-care strategy to unwind? ❤️
sending love 🫶🏻
@LilacLeopard14 i’ve been listening to relaxing sounds of cat purring on YouTube as well as chatting to a peer worker and a clinician about this situation. Right now I’m watching another video on YouTube to distract myself a bit especially since I’m not able to get myself productive enough to be able to work on an assignment. I’ve also been getting IBS symptoms and that’s all due to the feelings I’ve got from that situation so I’m trying to take deep breaths here and there to calm my nervous system.
I really hate how there can be certain teens or anyone that would try to strike up a convo with a random stranger that is alone and that they think would be a good idea to approach with… I feel that they’re trying to get me to join a cult especially since the dude first used the “I like your ____” tactic. But it’s usually young adults that approach other young people with this type of thing, so for a teenage person that just came straight out of high school to do this is really unusual. Part of me feels that they were doing a truth or dare thing…
