How to deal with social anxiety?
I was invited out to a 21st tonight, its being held at a popular bar.
I haven't been out to such a social place like that in a awhile but i'm very much questioning about going tonight. I'm all sorts of nervous and fearful of not enjoying myself/being myself, my friends leaving me, some of the people going i haven't seen or spoken to since high school, i have trouble socializing, Some of the times i have been out i haven't had the best experience so i know that's contributing to my fears, my mind/nerves are going crazy but i want to give it a chance but then i really don't. Could use some advice on what to do? Whether to go or sit this one out.
Comments
Hey @Mila28 you never know this social event might turn out. You could find yourself having a decent time. It's good to mentally prepare for this sort of this if it makes you nervous. You don't have to be having a blast every minute you're there. Try seeing this is as an experiment in stretching your tolerance for social situations. Don't pressure yourself to have a great time. Stay tuned to your feelings and talk to a few people. The key here is self-compassion 🙂 Do let us know how this goes for you.
Thankyou all for your advice, appreciate it!
I did end up going after hours of debating with myself and surprisingly enjoyed myself. I tried hard to put aside my thoughts and just focus on enjoying the moment and relaxing even though there was a lot of people being around my friends made it more comfortable which helped me be quite social.
I don't regret going, i'm glad i toke that big leap and did it!
Guess its some good advice for anyone else dealing with social anxiety, you'll never know if you don't go.
The last time I went out to an out-place was a restaurant with some friends (most of which I hadn't seen since high school) and it was scary, but I managed alright as I stayed close to my friend that I was closest with and she provided me with, say a rock is the mess of socialness (if that makes any sense). Do any of your friends know how you feel about socialising?
If you can, a tip is to drive yourself there, that way if you feel stressed or overwhelmed, you can easily excuse yourself and leave.
I can't speak much for bars, at all really, as I have no experience in them, but I'm sure that you'll make the right choice for you. 🙂
Hey @Mila28, I reckon this question would be pretty relatable to a lot of people on RO! Hopefully you get a few responses to this.
I don't have too much advice for you, except just to say that even if you don't go it doesn't mean that you won't be able to go to any social event - bars are pretty complicated and intense environments socially, and it can be hard to navigate a space like a bar where there are so many people around.
That being said, there are resources on anxiety and social anxiety on RO that you could check out too.
Let us know how things go 
