I don't know how to take care of myself?
Hi, um first post here : ) stay safe everyone, don't feel pressured to read. I'm safe and okay < 3
I dunno if i should introduce myself but i'm louie! i have a couple chronic illness, but that's not what i'm talkin about now. I don't really know how to explain it, but i don't know how to take care of myself when things get hard. I love takin' care of my friends, family, plants, pets, anyone but myself, and it's second nature to me. When my boyfriend was around, he would make sure i'm okay, and help me push through the hard bits, now though, I've had to move away. I've struggled with anxiety and depression, not to mention gender dysphoria and type one diabetes. T1D forces me to take care of a lot of my physical health, because i don't want to burden others. But when it comes to, showering, eating, going out, ect. i can't bring myself to do anything. I feel like i can't tell my parents about it, my mum's an alcoholic and thus doesn't listen to me. And my step-dad doesn't deserve my problems, as well as his, my other half-siblings, and the death of my dad (his best friend). I just sorta don't know what to do, reaching out to my friends makes me feel like a burden, even if not, i want to be able to support myself, without burning out. I just don't know anymore. I feel like maybe i should talk to my therapist about it, but i've already got so much other nonsense going on. This sorta sounds like me just venting, but i'm so lost. I want to be okay! But i don't know how.
Comments
Hey @louie_al3x !
Thank you for your post, it's so good that you are reaching out and looking to take care of yourself. You definitely should bring it up with your therapist, they can really help you navigate everything you have going on. A good place to start with some self-care is just doing some light exercise, getting good sleep and even just stepping outside for a bit and getting some sunlight. Baby steps is key here. All the best to you 🙂
Thank you @Blueberry_Kudu !
I've found getting out and about does help a lot!! thank you for reminding me ❤️
Hey @louie_al3x
I can actually relate to not knowing how to take care of myself and yet taking care of everyone else around me. I also struggle with anxiety and depression.
I struggle just to do those basics of showering and making sure i eat enough and it's really difficult most of the time.
I think that you definitely should talk to your therapist about it if your comfortable. They'll be able to help you get there.
I just wanted to let you know that i relate to how your feeling - am here for the support and if you need to talk.
Hi! @ruby_t
Thank you so much, I've felt a little alone, so knowing someone else can relate is really helpful < 3
I'll try talking to my therapist about it! I'm here if you need to talk or want some support as well.
Thankyou @louie_al3x
How have you been going these past couple of days ?
Hi @ruby_t !!
I've been prettty good! Slowly getting better at doing little things for myself, how are you going?
That's really great to hear! Glad things are good for you.
I've been really struggling.. Trying to get out of old habits.
oh no, im always here if you need to talk!! dont hesitie to reach ouy ❤️
Hi @louie_al3x
A big welcome to the online community! We're really glad to have you here and to see you reaching out for some support ❤️
I can certainly understand why you might be feeling a bit lost at the moment, it sounds like you've got a lot on your plate. Plus dealing with a chronic illness can really make everything a lot harder. I know you mentioned that you didn't want to focus on that in this post, but we do have a great thread called the Chronic Illness Support Squad that you might like to check out 😊
You've mentioned that you've struggled with depression and anxiety, have you had any support from your GP with that at all? Both of these can make things that feel like basic self-care tasks feel like a marathon! So you're definitely not alone in finding showering, going out etc especially tough. We have this article that gives some self-help strategies, have a read through and let us know if you think any of them might be helpful for you.
I can definitely relate to wanting to be able to support yourself and not wanting to feel like a burden to others. But I think we all need to find a balance with those things. It's great to be able to rely on yourself when it's needed, but if we want to avoid burnout and work on progressing? We need support from others. A tough thing to feel comfortable with, I know. But if you're not quite at the point of wanting to ask friends for help, I think your suggestion of talking to your therapist is a really great first step. Have you got an appointment with them coming up?
You also mentioned experiencing gender dysphoria, is that something you'd like to chat more about? We have a wonderful trans, gender diverse and non-binary community here that I'm sure will be happy to support you 🥰
I'm going to send you an email as well, so look out for that in your inbox soon ❤️
Hi! I have had a lot of support from my gp, and everyone else in my life, which is why I'm a little frustated 😕 thank you for the links! i'll make sure to check em out, and bring up my feelings with my therapist, thank you again
Hey there @louie_al3x ,
It's great to hear you have so much support in place.
You mentioned this is why you are frustrated. Is it because you feeling you have support but you still find yourself where you are right now?
We're interested to hear more about this - if you feel like sharing of course.
Once again, good on you for reaching out!
hullo, @Chloe-RO
i'm frustratted because i have support, but still feel sad? if that makes sense! maybe i need more support, or a diffrent kind! i don't know 😅
Hi there @louie_al3x 👋
What you've said makes complete sense! It's confusing and disheartening when you have support but still feel sad. It sounds like you've got a lot on your plate at the moment, so it also makes sense that you're feeling down. Sadness is a normal and healthy reaction to hard times!
You mentioned that maybe you need more support or a different kind - which is such a great insight. Have you opened up about how you're feeling with any of your support people?
Also, I just want to remind you that we've sent you an email, so when you have spare time, please check it out 😌
hi!
I've organised to call my therapist soon, so i'm hoping to bring up how i've been feeling with her. The support from everyone here has really helped < 3
I'll have a look at my emails now 🙂
So glad to hear you have found the supports here helpful @louie_al3x .
We will wait to hear how the call with your therapist goes.
All the best.
